Fall of the sea god
by Theleafylord
Summary: Percy get screwed in any and every possible way by everyone he cares about. Warning gets Hazy.
1. 1039 Smoothed out Slappy Hours

**1039 Smoothed out Slappy Hours**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordan**

Hi! My name is Percy Jackson. For as long as I could remeber weird things have happened to me. That's cause I'm a half blood. That used to be the reason for all the crap in my life. It used to screw everything up. But now I've managed to screw things up all on my own. Immortal families are internally messy. But they also are kinds prone to acts of incest. Raping each other,sleeping with your daughter,fooling around with your cousin. That is all normal to them. Unfortently some of it became normal to me. For instance the whole Luke and Annabeth thing, was weird enough. The me and Thalia thing was even weirder. Back to my life!

"Thalia. Daughter of Zeus" said Thalia. Annabeth was kneeling next to us now. This was going to be difficult. How to you tell a girl that her best friend has betrayed her, all her friends are now seven years older and most of her favourite bands had broken up? "Uh, Thalia we have something to tell you" I began. "But first say hello to Annabeth" Annabeth turned to stare at me as Thalia's eyes widened. "Where is she?" asked Thalia leaning slightly forward. Annabeth seemed to freeze. "Right there" I said pointing at Annabeth. I thought Thalia would be shocked or maybe even a little fased. All she did was say "How long was I out?"

Before I could answer Chiron took Thalia out of my grasp. "My Dear, you need medical attention. I will also fill you in on everything that has happened." Chiron turned to look at me. "Percy, find a Sartyr and tell him to ready a calming tune. You have to go wake up everything and everybody. They may not be happy, but if Thalia's awake it means one thing. Zeus will be coming." And with that he galloped off. I quickly ran to Grover. Annabeth followed looking shocked. "Word up, Percy!" said Grover making a peace sign. "Grover can you make a calming tune?" I asked. "For Sure!" said Grover. "Here we go!" he said taking out his pipes. A hollow distorted tune filled the air. "Now come on we have to go find a Sartyr to play a calming tune" I said to Annabeth. Annabeth seemed to have calmed down enough to ask a question. "But Grover is already playing a calming tune." "Yeah but that's to wake everyone up."

The entire camp was awake and sitting around the campfire. Dionysos was briefing us. "Hello you arrogant brats!" he began. The campers cheered just to throw him off. "The great Lord Zeus wil be visiting us along with Athena and Ares. They will be here to discuss the fate of Thalia and Percy." He turned to fix me with his best stare. "That will be in one hour. However in three hours all the major gods will come here. They are here to discuss which of you is the child that would serve us best. If Percy is chosen they both live. However if Thalia is chosen Percy will be killed to ensure that she reaches 16 before him. And Percy, I'm so voting for Thalia." Dionysos drew in his breath. "Now when every god is here you will be forced to abonded the rags you call clothes for actaul Greek clothes." One of the Ares guys started moaning. "We're going to have to wear skirts again." "All your parents have send your clothes to your cabins. Except for the unclaimed losers in cabin elven. Because their Parent doesn't love them or even care that they exist" "Mister D Please" said Chiron. "Like it's my fault their a bunch of losers who nobody will ever love?Huh!" Normally those words would hurt but when your already thinking them they seemed to rip you apart. I could see several kids looking at Dionysos with pure hate. "Now all of you except for the afore mentioned losers in cabin elven, go get dressed. Shoo!Shoo!" As the campers walked away I saw something that I thought I would never see in Dionysos eyes. Fear.

I approached my cabin wearily. I had no doubt I would be forced to wear skirts and soft white shirts. I found a note on my door saying "Perseus, your clothes have been provided by me and your uncle Hades. He seemed to have taken an interest in you.

Ps. Don't worry. Hades is very punk rock." I walked in and stared at the clothes I was excpected to wear. Their was no skirt. Instead there was a pair of pitch plack pants with two pictures of Hades's symbol on them. A bronze helmet. The shoes were Nike's that had the words Hades written on them in Punk style. It was however the shirt that shocked me. It was a shimmering green, the excact coulour of my eyes with the slogon AC DC. Whoever insted of lightning bolts their were two trytants. I put my clothes on and smiled at the idea of Clarrise in a skirt.

Me and Annabeth met up halfway to the campfire. She like everyone else was staring at my clothes. I thought it was probably cause I was the only person not wearing a skirt. "Percy why in Zeus name are you wearing Hades's symbol?" "It's much more catchy than my Dad's." I said Sarcastically. Annabeth slowed down. All the circle were standing at a half ring. Most of their jaws were practically lying on the floor. When I saw why my jaw dropped too. Dionysos, freaky trail park reject, Dionysous was standing there. But he looked different. He looked excackly like those statues you see of the greek gods. The change was shocking. "Half Bloods" he called, voice loud and clear, unlike his usaul drawl. "My brothers and sisters approach.Don't look at me!" he yelled. The air shimmered and a man approached with a long red beard. He had muscles on his arms and thin wily legs. Heaphsteus had come.

The next one to come was Aphrodite came and placed herself on his arm. She was the very defintion of hot. She calmly placed herself on Heaphsteus's arm all the while glancing at Ares who came next. Hermes came next, looking extremelly jittery in formal robes. Athena followed looking gracefull in jeans and a t-shirt. Next came Artemis. She had long dark black hair and shimmering eyes. She was wearing army pants and a red t-shirt. She had a hunting rifle slung across her back and was chewing pink bubblegum. She calmly waited for Appolo to appear. He came in a shiny tuxedo with carefully combed hair. I was pretty sure he was gay. Demeter followed in battered jeans and a pink t-shirt. Next came my dad. He was wearing jeans and an haiwain t-shirt. He was smoking something I was pretty sure wasn't a siggarette. He smiled at me and walked off. Zeus followed in a black power suit. He took me by the shoulder and steered me of towards the campfire. Except that the campfire was now on top of a marble pedestal and their was a large marbe roofless courtroom, everything was normal.

Each god seemed to sit instantly. Their was however an open chair. The chair that was left of Zeus. Hades's chair. Zeus stood. "As you all know my daughter has returned to the living realm. As you all know the prophecy dictates that one them wil safe or destroy us all. Now we have to chose. Both of them are trustworthy so all that is left is to decide which of them to trust with our lives.We know both of them are powerfull heroes." Zeus shot an angry look at Posedion as he said that part. I looked at Thalia who had come to sit down next to me. She was wearing a long white dress with a black shirt that said Skywack. This shirt had lightining bolts however. "And now lets hear the cases. Afterwards we will vote who is most worthy."

My dad stepped up. He stared at Zeus. "Percy should be chosen for this. He is a proven warrior and has also shown he would never betray us. Thalia hasn't the fighting expirence he has. He is also a friend of the cyclopses. They have already promised me if a war with Kronos comes they wil fight under my banner. And Percy will be the one to weild it." Posedion sat. I had hoped he would make a longer speech but he didn't. Zeus stood up next. "Thalia is far better suited for this task than Perseus. She lacks expirence but can easily attain it. She also if any would care to remeber, went down fighting. She won't stop fighting for us no matter what. She is also far more powerfull than Perseus in the sense that Poseidon is the only god who can claim to train him. Tradisionally all children of Zeus will be trained by me, Athena and Artemis, while the children of Poseidon are trained by him,Ares and Apollo. Ares and Apollo for some reason despises the boy and refuse to train. Poseidon will need help to train Percy up to stantard in this short time. Thalia had more time and teachers. She may be weaker now but she will eventually be a far more powerfull warrior that Perseus." Zeus sat. "If any has any objections please voice them or shut up forever,and because we're gods, we mean litterally forever." said Dionysos. No one spoke. Partly cause Zeus's argument rested on training and he was right. My dad would need help, but Zeus had probably made sure nobody would help him. Zeus was beginning to smile when a darkness gripped my hear. I felt cold. So cold. I knew what it meant. Hades had shown up.

Hades had struck me as the most godlike god, and even in the clothes he was wearing he appeared to be immortal. He wore picthblack jeans and a macthing t-shirt that was just like mine except it had lightining bolts. His hair glistened with green highlights. "Yes, I have one. For the matter of Percy's training. He will also be trained by me." I felt hope in my chest until he siad. " I will summon the most deadly monsters that their are to battle him" Suddenly I wasn't so sure he was here to help me. "Believe me, that way he would get the maximum amount of training." All the gods stared at Hades. Annabeths eyes lit up as she suddenly realised why I was wearing Hades symbol. "Let the voting begin" said Zeus gravely.

My head shot up. "Okay eveybody. For evey meter of the fire that is blue, Perseus has been voted for, for every yellow meter it's means a vote for Thalia." Weird system. However the fire flared up high and was blinding. "Hell Yeah" I yelled and sat. There was much more blue fire than yellow fire. Dionysos stood. "Very well, the bastard lives."

**The story is something I wanted to write for a long time but I couldn't find an place to post it. Tell me if it's any good. Title will be explained in the next chapter.**


	2. I get partially digested

**I get partially digested**

**Disclaimer: Percy belongs to Rick Riordian. Percy's training scenes are loosely based on situations in Empire Earth, Zeus and Age of Mythology. It will also indrotuce new monsters.**

When half bloods train, they train against each other or against wooden dummies. I was not training against any form of the living. I was fighting against the dead. Hades's brilliant plan was to let me train in the underworld. That way I had 1039 hours before the summer ended. Made sense but unfortunetly this meant I was in Hades's realm. And in his realm the dead walked, monsters roamed free and screams of the damned could always be heard. All of them answered to one Lord. Lord Hades. And as such I had limitless enemies. Back to my life!

I was standing in the underworld. It was actually beautifull, with lush fields and incredible plants. The gardens of Persperphone. Less sightly was the skeleton army Hades had gathered. " Now Perseus I need you to pay attention. You are in my realm and you cannot die. You will now be facing a small army of skeletons" said Hades. He snapped his fingers and they attacked. I defeated them easily and Hades smiled encourgingly. "Lord Hades I have a question" I said. "How can the skeletons see without eyes?" Hades looked starteled for a second. "How can you walk around without a brain? Some things none of us can answer." Ok, that wasn't excackly satisfying. "Now Perseus your skills are on a competent level. It's time to meet your trainers." I stared and saw a man aproach. A man with white hair and storm gray eyes. "Greetings Percy. I am known as Perseus too , seeing as that is my name." Finally it made sense. It was more than the time difference. Hades could summon any hero he wanted to train me.

I soon had a large collection of hero's to train me. Perseus and Achilles came. Stangely he didn't look like he did in Troy. My next trainers were famous : Napoleon who was a son of Hades. General S. Patton who was a son of Zeus and Horatio Nelson who was also a son of Posedion. He had my eyes and basic build. He and Perseus came to me first. "Perseus and Achilles's wil instruct you in the art of swordfighting." said Horatio. "Patton and Napoleon will teach you the art of conqeust." said Perseus. "And I shall teach you to fully grasp your powers."

Achille's and Perseus got the first turn. They demonstrated moves and had me copy them. I was able to hold my own against Perseus but I suppose he wasn't really trying. Achilles was unreal. He moved with speed and grace unlike anything I had ever seen. He calmly showed me different styles of fighting and how I should try to fight Luke. "Boy " he began in a gruff voice. "We watched your last match with him and he wiped the floor with you. Even with a shield he wil probably be victorious. The only time you could match him was when you used your powers over water. So the latter part of your training will be partaken close to the river styx." Okay I get to douse my enemies with polluted water. "Percy do not be dishearted" said Perseus in his calm voice. "I have decided you are most suited for the two swords technique. I used sword and sickle , but to each is own." Now resume your training with Napoleon and Patason.

War training was .. .odd. I suspect it was because my one teacher tried to teach me morals while my other teacher tried to explain that sacrifices must be made so that goals could be achieved. Of course their methods of warfare was somewhat strange. I knew I would be fighting with monsters but apparently these guys had always been fighting that way. Cher Ami the famous pigeon was acautally a monsorous griffin that was used as a messanger. The griffin did indeed deliver the message but had first attempted to rip as many soldiers to shreds as he could. As for Napoleon, he liked to use Hellhounds as horses. The destruction they caused was legendary. However at the battle of waterloo a brave attack by some British children of Athena managed to kill them before they could reach the battlegrounds. "Now Percy It's important you understand one thing: All monsters will try to rip you to shreds. The monsters gladly fought for us since we gave them the only thing they wanted. Slaughter. And Kronos is offering them far more than you. The only beasts that you can get to stand with you so far are the Cyclopses, Centaurs and the Mayneds." "What are Mayneds?" I asked. Patton sighed. "Boy ,the Mayneds are the women of the cult of Dionysos. They are always drunk and nowhere near as pleasent." He snorted slightly. Dionysos was not the most pleasent god or person. The only way they could be less pleasent was if they were insane. Patton seemed to read my mind. "Don't worry Percy the Mayneds aren't insane. They are just permanently drunk and fond of ripping people to shreds with their bare hands." Great. I had no reason to worry.

Napoleon and Patton then sat down. "Percy a hero is not just a great fighter. He knows when to make his move and are prone to horrible deaths. Napoleon for instance lost the battle of water loo due to a violent diahrea attack." Said Pattason. "It was the children of Demeter. They did something with my food" growled Napoleon. "Yes in any case you must learn the arts of dimoplicy, reasoning and betrayal. Diplomicy will teach you how to get the warriors you need, reasoning will allow you to keep them. We won't teach you too much about dimoplicy since there is only one group of monsters who would consider joining you. The Mayneds." said Pattason. "The secret is simple" said Napoleon. "Give them what they want or say you will. Remember Percy , you put a monster on a field and you gain a expandble troop. Put a want to fight in their non- existent-hearts and you win a warrior." said Napoleon. "The Myneds only want one thing: Wine. Give it to them and they will fight for you." sai Pattoson. "Now go to Horatio. You will find his lesson interesting."

It was funny in the underworld. You couldn't get hungry, tired or feel any sort of pain. Hades had done something so that I was like the other dead. However when he wanted to, Hades can restore live and stop death. That's why the fields of punisment is so bad. You starve but not to death. You can take unsurpassable agony and not pass out. In short Hades cursed the people the way the people in Pirates of the Carribean were cursed. That's why it's never wise to cross Hades. And that's why Zeus turned Thalia into a pine tree. When a hero dies who crossed Hades his parent usally turns him into something to keep them from the Underworld. As I approached Hopratio I suddenly shuddered. I didn't want to know what Luke's punishment would be.

I was kind of excited to meet Lord Nelson. He died defying Hades but My dad got him a place worthy of a hero. "Hello Percy." He said Softly. "And before you jump to conclusios I only kissed one man" He was now nervously stroking his clothes. "See I wanted to go like a Hero and the line Kiss me Hardy is now quite famous and" I cut him off. "Now it was definitly the way I would have wanted to go. Kissed by my best friend. Of course my best friend is a hot blond girl." Horatio bowed. "You have the trademark sarcasam. You are a true son of Posideon." Oh damn. " Anyway Percy what is your father the god of?" "My father is the god of the sea , earthquakes and horses." Horatio nodded his head. "And your powers are?" "Uh... I can control the sea and talk to horses?" Horatio smiled again. "Honestly how they expected you to know this. You have two thirds of your major powers. Can you guess what the third is?" I suddenly got excited. "I can cause earthquakes?" "Quite correct Perseus." Said Horation. "Weak ones but they will throw your enemy off balance." "But how do I do it?" "The same thing as with the sea. You will the ground to shake. Why did you think your friend Annabeth accused the sons of Poseidon to rip buildings down?" He asked. "Wait how to you now that?" "We've been watching you Percy, not when you shower or anything but we have been watching you." said Horatio. After a long time of causing minor earthquakes he spoke again. "Now your training with me is complete. You must now defeat Perseus and Achille's to progress." Defeat two hero's who wiped the floor with me. It seemed unfair but I could now make the floor move.

Achilles stood ready at the bank of the river Styx with a short sword and shield. Perseus sword was longer and he also had a sickle. And Hades. Hades was standing there with a very long silver sword. He took a long, carefull look at me and the sword shrunk to a better lengh. "Perseus has informed me you are to train with two swords. Well, this will be your other sword. It is known as the blade of death, or Timmy." "You called the sword of death Timmy?" I asked. "Yes, but that is not important. The sword is made of a combination of silver and celestial Bronze." said Hades. "Wait , you mean this sword is like backbiter? Deadly to mortals and immortals?" I asked. "No, Percy this sword will go right through mortals." I relaxed slightly. "Unfortently if they try to touch the sword they will die." "Why the hell do you need a sword that can do that?" I asked. "Well, it's great for empting seats in the movie theater, getting rid of annoying relatives, doing your laundry...But enough. Take the sword and begin your training.

I put the silver sword in my right hand and Riptide in my left. Fighting with two swords gave you far less power but excellent defence. Achille's ran towards me swinging the sword in a half circle. I called a wave from the river Styx and pushed him back. I then shook the ground making it impossible for him to get up. I ran forwards, jumped and knocked his shield away with Riptide. I used Timmy to block his short sword and placed Riptide on his neck. Perseus was more difficult but he couldn't really defend his left side with his sickle. I actually pushed him into the river in the end. Hades smiled. "And now Perseus, face the strongest hellhound ever. The father of all other Hellhounds. Meet Levtrinna!" Suddenly a giant hellhound the size of a two story house came and swallowed me whole. Really. "Hades are sure that was completely neccesery?" asked Perseus. "Is it neccesery that I wear the souls of people as clothes?" asked Hades. "I honestly don't know" said Perseus. "Well I do it anywhy due to my commitment to my job and the faint, but highly enjoyable tickling sensation it gives."

I didn't hear anything of that since I was inside a monsters stomache. Why the hell did I have to get attacked by something this big? The could have at least warned me. "Percy this plays a great role in what is to come" said someone. "Wait where are you?" I asked. "On the floor" came the answer. I felt around on the floor and found something that really wanted to make me vomit. "Hello Percy. My name is Jeff and I'm here to help you." said the head. A severed human head. "Why the hell am I touching you?" I asked him. "That is not important. Perseus you were being watched by Zeus. He doesn't think you are worthy so he will try everything possible to kill you. He is watching , always. However he can not see inside a monster and as such Hades slashed my head off and threw it in this beasts stomache so that I can explain a few things to you. We have litttle time. First , Zeus had already started training Thalia. He will, If we are correct try to kill you when you are at school. He will send monsters to pose as teachers in your school. He will also try to shoot lightning at you, so stay inside during thunderstorms. If worst comes to worst he will try to stick nails in your eyes." "Right. So what do you want me to do?" I asked. "Befriend Thalia. He won't send to many monsters to kill you if there is a chance she will be hurt. Hades has suggested that you become more than friends" said Jeff. "Uh... my I ask why?" "Simple. A hero is a god's last resort. He will eventually send her to kill you. We will prefer to avoid that kind of thing. "Question. Isn't that incest?" "Well Yeah, but things are different in immortal families. It's not like I asked you to go out with Michael Jackson or anything." said Jeff. "I'm not related to Michael Jackson!" I yelled. "Now that's even beter!" said Jeff. "Of course with your dark hair and gorgeous eyes he will probably..." "Let me get this straight. A corpseless head is flirting with me?" I asked. "You say that like it's a bad thing" said Jeff, licking his lips. "Ah , I'm beginning to feel really hot" I breathed. "I knew you were into me" said Jeff. "No you moron , I'm mean my legs feel like they're on fire!" I said. "Uh, that will be the stomach acids begining to digest you" said Jeff ,looking dissapointed. "You will have to go. Cut your way out through the soft underbelly. Zeus is probably getting suspicious." I started killing the hellhound softly with my sword. "Right. Thanks for the info. I'm now ready for my heady adventuring." I jumped out before Jeff let out a groan.

After that I learned how to focus my powers with Horatio, various tactical skills from Patton and Napoleon and continued sparring and doing fisical excercises with Achilles's and Perseus. "Your training for this summer is now complete." said Hades. My tutors bowed slightly. "These hero's have agreed that we stand a chance in this fight" Perseus came forward. "You will be a great hero , Percy. And hopefully you will live happily. Remember to go by what you believe in not what others do. This is your quest. Your life. Go make us proud." I waved back to them as Hades led me back to the surface world.

When I stepped into the boundries of camp half blood Annabeth came and hugged me. "Are you okay? Do you even know how long you've been gone?" She always rushed her words when she was nervous. "I'm fine. Don't worry." Annabeth put her head on my shoulder while Thalia watched us both. "Percy this is the last day of camp. We are going to eat and then leave." Annabeth smiled weakly at me. "Well lets go. I'll tell you what happened.

Lunch was fun. All the other campers seemed shocked by my appearence and I had no idea why. Of course I was used to the whole "Gah! You're incredibly ugly!" treatment. "Annabeth do I look different?" I asked. Annabeth blushed slightly and Thalia answered. "You look good. Really good. What did you do in the underworld?" Annabeth laughed slightly. "Percy you look different. It's kinda hard to explain. You just...do" "Must be all the dead. Of course it did wonders for my complextion" I said. "So what excackly did you do?" asked Annabeth. I briefly explained all the the things I did. Annabeth and Thalia seemed shocked when I mentioned I was eaten by a gaint hellhound. I didn't tell them about Jeff. I did however try to subtely achieve my goals. I smiled at Thalia. "Thalia, were you and Luke more than friends?" Thalia stiffend slightly at the mentioning of Luke's name but seemed otherwise fine. "No. Just good friends. Why do you want to know?" Okay, this could go better. "I have achieved great things" I said in my most serious voice. "And now I'm busy with my evil plan to get you to fall for me!" Thalia laughed and Annabeth suddenly stared at me. "So that's your best pick up line?" asked Thatlia. "No actually , my best pick up line is , you're like a spanner, because when I think of you my nuts go tight." Thalia started laughing again while Annabeth looked more worried. I smiled happily. I didn't mind my mission. I kinda liked Thalia.

Shortly afterwards we left and went to our homes. My mom was her usual worried self. Note. Never tell your mom you spend over 1000 hours training with the dead and massive monsters. They tend to fuss a little. She also found me a new school. It was a school for the crimminally insane a.k.a me. The next day I went to my new school. St.Jimmy's school for insane people. Not very subtle.

I was sitting in attendance, waiting patiently for the signs of the evil teachers who are out for my blood. They will probably be like Ms. Dodds I reasoned. Unfortently I was wrong. "Hello class" said a perky woman in her late twenties. "I'm Ms. Harper, but you can call me Ms. Harpy." she said smiling and fixing me with an ice cold glare. Great. An evil monster who wants to eat me disguised as an ultra nice woman. "Ah! She touching my special area!" Yelled a boy in the back row. What the hell did I get myself into?

**The goal of war is not to die for your country. It's to make the other bastard die for his-General S. Patton**


	3. My teacher tries to eat me

**My teacher tries to eat me and calls it art**

**Disclaimer:Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordian.**

St. Jimmy's was an interresting school. I was there for a week before the accusations started. The whole he torched a school, started a new cult and tried to feed his old class to a shark thing. Even though I was proven to be not guilty the repeated incidents were making people believe I was very good at weaseling out of trouble. Ms. Harpy was nice to everyone except me so she was definitly my evil monster foe. So far she's tried to poison me, electorcute me and make me read Hamlet. Of course, fighting to the death with your teacher tends to get you in trouble. Back to my life!

I was sitting in art class next to a guy who probably hasn't brushed his teeth since 1993 while Ms.Harpy lectured us. We were supposed to draw a picture together. Thankfully the guy left to go work with someone else. That left me with Alex. Now Alex was the other "Crimannaly insane" kid in my class. He wore red and black and had short black hair. He looked normal enough unless you saw his left arm. It had a long scar on it. He was caught attacking random things in air and several old ladies. We started drawing together. "So how about them local sport teams?" I asked trying to make small talk.

"Shut up" he breathed. I wasn't really worried. He had a weird girlish-build. Unfortently Ms. Harper heard us. More unfortenetly while everybody talked , I was the only one who got punished for it. "Percy, come see me after class" she said sweetly. "You beter bring it on" I whispered. "I have Riptide and Timmy with me!" Incedently Timmy could be shrunk to any size but it had limits to how big it could get. We completed our painting of the sea. Well, I did the sea. He draw a lot of death an destruction on the shore line.

"Percy your behaviour is creating problems for the other learners" she said sweetly, eyeing me like I was a naughty five year old. "You will be punished" she whispered and my hand flew to Timmy. When there were no regular mortals in the class I could see Ms. Harpy a bit more clearly. And right now her hand changed to a long blue talon. "Lord Zeus has given me permission to" she cut off and stared. Alex was staring at Ms Harpy like he could see her talons too. But the mist returns with mortals. Alex was here but that mist wasn't so that means...Alex is a half blood too. "Not this again! Why won't you, you things leave me alone?" Alex was panicking. He ran off before either me or Ms. Harpy could speak. "We will continue our discussion later" said Ms. Harpy. "Yes Ms." I replied before running off after Alex.

Every school I've been at I have been bullied by random people. At this school things were different. I was considered the scariest kid in school. However Alex was not. Some kids were messing with him. They asked him something and I only managed to hear his answer. "Hmmm. Let me decide. No I'm pretty sure you can't do that with a melon. They were moving closer when I showed up. Timmy was knife size so this wasn't a problem.They ran as soon as they saw me change me pen into a sword and back again. Alex however didn't. "Alex , about what happened in class" I began. "Are you one of them?" he demanded. "One of those monsters? The gaint dogs? lizard people? Demon grannies?" "Those weren't old ladies you attacked." I said. He stood still. "And their were things in the air. Only you could see them" I guessed. He was going a little bit pale. "Alex you aren't insane. You are a half blood." "What do you mean?" he asked. "I mean one of your parents is an immortal god or goddess." Alex stepped back. "I live with my mom in the Bronx." We were walking side by side like friends. "I'll explain everything to you at your home" I said. "Oh Damn." he said. "I sms'd my mom and told her our art teacher tried to eat you."

Alex's mom was almost excackly like mine. She didn't care that her boy was a danger to himself or others, she just wanted him safe and happy. "Mom Percy has got something he wants to tell us" said Alex. "What is it honey?" she asked cheerily. I could tell easily Alex was embarressed. At school he avoided any type of emotion. "Ms , Uh , Alex's mom there is something you should know about Alex. You should sit down." His mom sat,. the smile never vanishing. "Alex isin't normal. He like me is a half blood. And by that I mean he is the son of a god. I know he doesn't look divine like me but he still is." A silence fell. "Right." I said. "What can you tell me of his father?" I asked. His mom smiled as she remembered. "He was gorgeous just like my little boy. He had the same black hair and incredible muscels. He wore red and black. Everything he wore was either red or black." This really wasn't good. I did not see that coming. "Wait" she said. "Why did your art teacher try to eat you?" Oh Damn. "Well , I am delicious ,ha ha" I replied with a soft laugh. They both stared. "Fine it was an art project." Alex snorted. "What was it called? Surrender to my tender claws and be digested?" "Claws?" gasped Alex's mom. "Oh. Forgot to mention. Our art teacher is actually an evil harpy who wants to eat both of us." I said. How's that for an ice breaker? The rest of the evening resumed with me teaching them about monsters and trying to figure out what happened in the alley. If Alex could waste that many monsters without training he would probably be really powerfull.

I was leaving when Alex called me. "Percy have you figured out who my dad is?" "You are the son of Ares , the god of war." I said and left.

Me and Alex were okay after that and trained together constantly. I also managed to get him his own sword. Ms. Harpy had continued her efforts to cause my demise. So far someone replaced my chemistry set with different chemicals , meaning that if I followed the directions I would create a bomb that would blow me and several other people to bits. But using a heroic strategy of incompetence I only made an anditote to Aids. She was now also trying to kill Alex. One day we decided to swhich seats. He sat on the seat that I usally sat on and sat on a needle with a note attached that said "Welcome to the wonderfull world of Aids". Thankfully we had the anditote and Alex was saved. We were confident. There was only one day of school left. There was no way I wouldn't mess this up.

Me and Alex entered the school in slow motion letting our jackets flow back into the winds. Ms. Harpy was standing at the end of the hall. Staring at us. Not the "No! My teacher is in love with me!" stare. It was the "No!My teacher is going to rip out my heart and used my blood to cover up schoolgrounds graffitty" stare. "You know Alex, I've never managed to complete school without being accused of doing something I didn't do. Well this time I'm going to do it!" I yelled and drew out Timmy and Riptide. I ran through the halls swinging my swords. "Gahh! It's Samury Jack!" yelled one kid. "It's Jack Sparrow!" yelled another. "No you fools! It's Vannila Ice in a desperate bid to get his career back on track!" While the kids argued Ms. Harpy let out a terrible screech. Her face turned blue. Wings sprouted out of her back. Her feet turned into talons and her hands into claws. Her clothes suddenly fell away. I suddenly stopped just for a few seconds. So a Harpy _does_ have the same body as a regular woman. Except it matches the color of the plumage of her wings.With another screech Ms.Harpy launched herself at me, claws streched. I shook my head a little and lashed out with Timmy. She pulled back slightly. "They are kung fu fighting!" yelled one of the kids. "Hey that is were I saw the leprechaun!" yelled another kid. She kept pulling back whenever I slashed or jabbed. I ducked , letting her fly over me when she tried to attack. She was now high in the air trying to fly over me again. I held Timmy up high. She laughed knowing that wasn't long enough to get her. Yet. The last thing she saw was the point of the blade going right through her.

I looked around the school. Our principle was staring at me. "Percy you just killed our art and english teacher." He whispered. "It wasn't me! It was Vanilla Ice!" I yelled hoping some of the other kids would back me up. "Percy I saw you stabbing her to death with a broom handle. And you know what this means." I sighed. Now I was going to be arrested for murdering my teacher. "We have to thank you boy. Although you will have to pay for the hole in the roof." I stared at him What the hell was wrong with him? Suddenly several members of swat ran into the building from stragetic points of entery. "Good job mister Jackson" said one of the Swat members. You have managed to eliminate a dangerous threat to socitey." "What?" This was getting unreal. "Well Mister Percy , after finding out that she didn't know the week before last was her birthday I started making enquires about our so called teacher." said our principle. "It turns out her allegged family has never heard of her. We have searched our entire govermental base and found no record of anyone matching her description and basic statistics , except for a Ms. Pj Mcklaren!" The swat guy took over. "Ms. Mcklaren was a dangerous murder. We could never find her and believed her to have gotten plastic surgery to alter her appearence. We have done a comprrasion check and the there was a 97 match. She was altered enough for it to change the rating." All the adult were smiling at me. "For ridding us of this danger to all children, everywhere we thank you." said the swat general and they left. "Mister Percy , I'm glad to announce you are a hero! As such , I'm evacuting school early! Also , we can't be here while the CIA inspect the murder scene." All the kids stared at him. "Now kids evacute means you can leave! Scram!" All the kids cheered and ran away.

"Percy that was awesome!" yelled Alex. "You totaly killed her!" "Yeah. But now it is time for us to go back to camp half blood." I smiled. "This is the first year I'm going to camp without being in the paper and called a lunatic." Alex looked uncomfortable. "Don't worry you are coming too." Alex looked even more uncomfortable. "Percy we should watch out. I've been having this weird feeling that something has been watching us all week and..." He never finished his sentance. Standing in front of us was a massive man made out of bronze. "I'm a Talos!" yelled teh bronze man. "And you Perseus Jackson, shall die!"

**Author's Note: Alex had noticed that a strange presence was watching him and had not informed the police. If he had we would have sent someone and this whole uncomfortable situation could have been avoided. So if you are being stalked by a gaint man made out of bronze , be sure to inform your local police. Thank you.**


	4. The Goggles do nothing

**The Goggles Do Nothing**

**Disclaimer: Percy belongs to Rick Riordian.**

Massive meant of abnormally large size. This bronze monster was as high my appartment building. Alex had turned completely white. He had two sets of goggles in his pocket for some reason. Then it hit me. There was also some lotions and bottles and potoins. Ever since learning he was a half blood Alex had been stocking up on things to help him survive. The goggles were supposed to let you see through heat waves and smoke. But what good would that do? My question was answered in the most dramatic and expensive way possible. Talos fired a coloum of flame at us.

"Jump!" I yelled and went sideways. Alex dodged the flame but the street didn't. The tar was melting. "What is that?" yelled a man who was staring. At the road. The mist was distorting their view and screwing mine up. One minute Talos looked like a bronze man , the next he looked like , a bronze building? Man the mist was not helping. People were confused. It's not every day a gaint bronze building starts firing bolts of flame. Occasionaly I could see some sort of cannon on the building that changed back into Talos's sword. I took out Timmy and Riptide. I saw Alex readying his own sword. Only Alex looked like he was readying a M16. I had one choice. Running at full speed I slashed Talos through the ankles. Deep cuts formed and healed. Regeneration and fire blasting abilities. Add that to about fifty feet of bronze muscle. What did Napoleon and Patton tell me about Talos?

_Percy there are several monsters against which there are no defence. The monsters from the darkest corners of Tartarus. And of course there is Talos. Talos is the greatest automation ever crafted. He was made by Heaphsteus to carry out the will of the smith god. Talos is not a monster. He can be remade but does not go to Tartarus. Only one hero has ever succeded in defeating him , and that was through sheer dumb luck. To destroy Talos you must remove the single screw at the back of his neck. The screw controls the flow of his life blood..._

Now the sheer luck part made sense. To get up there would be near impossible. I don't know if I would've thought up a strategy on my own because the next moment Talos sword connected with me. Luckily it was the blunt part , unluckily the sheer force flung me into a fruit stall , which had been long abbondend. I felt like I was about to black out , but something kept me from doing that. A force like Hades's gripped my heart and wouldn't let go. I was forced to watch my friend die horribly.

It was perfectly logical to assume that Alex would be destroyed by Talos but Alex clearly wasn't thinking logically. He was standing right in front of Talos, the melting tar burning him and smiling at the massive monster as if was all beneath him.Wait a minute. The tar was burning him but I could see no sign of pain. Talos had noticed too. He swung his sword down hard. I wanted to scream, just to get Alex to snap out of it and run. But he just calmly drew out a different sword than the one he usally uses. A sword radiating black light. The swords struck and sprang apart. Alex's goggles were melting slowly , doing nothing other that proving Alex was somehow fire resistent. "I have a _gift_ for you!" he yelled and lifted up his right hand. Flames sprouted from his hands and started melting Talos. He was trying to swing his sword but couldn't. Alex smile grew manical. "Eat flaming death!" Alex yelled and proceded to jump over fifty feet in the air and slash through Talos's neck. The small screw as smashed and Talos was undone. But what the hell was Alex? The force released me and I plunged back into the welcoming darkness.

An hour later I came too in my mom's apartment. She was going nuts and Alex was sitting on the chair grinning lazily at me. Of course. He didn't know that I saw him. "Hey Man" I said coughing slightly. Alex grinned even more. "Never thought we were getting out of that one" he said laughing. "How did we get out of that one?" I asked. "Got lucky" he said. "Threw my sword after dancing around on the tar a bit. Clipped the smarmy bastard of a gaint bronze man right on the life preserving screw. The mist made it difficult though." Of course the mist would have affected the way Alex took down Talos.

"Percy!" yelled my mom and pulled me into a hug. She seemed to be muttering to herself. "It's for the best...for the best" "Mum what are you talking about?" I asked. "Percy get in the car I'll explain as we go"

"Percy if Zeus is sending monsters after you It will be for the best if you go to camp half blood." My mom was definitly not in her happy spot. Alex was looking nauseated. "Does your mom know there is such a thing as speeding laws?" asked Alex. "Percy I don't want to but I have to" I understood perfectly. My mom always hated the day I left her. We reached camp half blood in incredible time. "I gotta go do something" said Alex as he left. He was clutching his stomache and heading for a couple of trees. My mom grabbed my hands as I began to walk away. "Percy promise me you won't go another one of your reckless adventures" she said. "Mom , I won't go unless there is a very good reason or if I'm extremmely bored" I said. My mom started straightening my shirt. "I understand Percy. You are truly like your dad. He just wouldn't stand still." She looked deep into my eyes. "Read your father's history Percy" she said. "Poseidon watches over you and all he cares about , but will stop at nothing to get what he wants." My mom looked like she wanted to say more but she turned and left. "Bye Mom" I whispered faintly.

Me and Alex started walking towards the big house. Alex was taking everything and didn't seem quite able to open his mouth. We heard voices when we approached the big house. "Chiron you are to watch my camp and ensure no one has more than the nessecary amount of fun" said Mr D. He was walking around in what I could only assume was his good clothes. A tight white skirt and a sparkiling blue shirt with the tradional sandals. "Mr.D were are you heading?" asked Chiron putting away his playing cards. " Due to my oustanding performance of convincing Heaphsteus to send Talos after Peter." "Percy" interjected Chiron. "Whatever. Any case I have been given one night to date wood nymphs and drink wine once more. It will be glorious. However" his gaze turned to scary god mode and Chiron took a step back. "If I come back and the camp is in good condition I will rape you for confining me to this place. If the camp is in bad condition I will rape you for not correctly gaurding my precious camp. So either way you are going to get" Chiron suddenly saw me. "Percy!" he said happily. "Peter!" said Mr.D with distaste."Perseus!"yelles a deep voice in the corner. It was some sort of sentry that flew away. Mr.D started to boil with rage. "You survived! How could you! You're killing me over here!" yelled Mr.D "Thank every deity known and unknown" said Chiron with feeling. "You saved me from a terrible fate boy." he sighed. "Dammit!" yelled Mr.D. "I never get to have any fun! Why didn't you die you stupid mortal!" Chiron had already started to lead both me and Alex out of the room.

Chiron gave both me and Alex a once over. He was trying to figure out if we were okay. "How did you survive the encounter with Talos?" he asked. "We uh , got lucky" I said smiling. Alex was looking at Chiron with a look beyond hatred. I had no idea why , seeing as he never met Chrion before. "Do you know you die on Age of Mythology?" asked Alex. Chrion smiled. "A most amusing game that. But yes , I would gladly sacrifice myself to ensure my father does not return to power" Alex look of rage met Chiron's sad look. "Percy I'm afraid I have some bad news for you." Oh crap. 'What is it?" I asked. "Thalia and Annabeth have been kidnapped." said Chiron.

**Sorry if the chapter was a bit short. School has restarted and it will take me longer to update. Thanks to all my reviewers!**


	5. Kerplunk!

**Kerplunk!**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordian**

It's odd when someone you really cared about is in danger. You immediately want to go and help them , or in my case sent whatever had kidnapped them straight to Tartarus. Adrenalin went through my body , my hand instinctively reached for Riptide. I wasn't aware of it , but the I was making the ground shake. In the myths you always hear about Poseidon's rage. The kind of power that made me defeat the minotaur and beat the Cyclops. I would find who kidnapped Annabeth and make them pay. Back to my Life!

Chiron's words seemed to hang in the air. Alex was trying to maintain his balance. Chiron's eyes were full of sorrow. He looked up. "Percy I do not wish you to do anything rash , I want you do continue your..." "Rash?" I yelled. "My best friend has been kidnapped! I'm not going to just go sit around waiting for some" "Percy" Chiron cut in. "Even if I wanted to I couldn't let you go on this quest." Chiron was holding me by the shoulders. It was actually weird how strong he was. "Dionysos has reinforced the borders with a new power. Without his permission there is now way you will be able to leave." Oh ,that pissed me off. "Like Mr.D could stop me" I yelled. "Riptide can harm gods , I will slash the Jerry Springer reject into swift oblivion if he tries" I yelled. "Come on Alex we have to go. Now." I took riptide and walked towards the borders. Only to be stopped by a large amount of monsters. "Dibs on the liver!" yelled on Harpy. Of course when a son of Poseidon has tapped into his rage , you _really_ shouldn't mess with him.

The harpy who wanted my liver flew straight towards me. In one swift movement I stuck Riptide through her chest. "Stop Percy you are killing the kitchen staff!" yelled Chiron. Big deal. I needed to vent my anger. It took me one swift leap to get to the other harpies. I simply struck them down before they could react. However the others raised claws and Talons to try and defend themselves. "Percy you fool!" Yelled Chiron. "They are probably going to form a union now!" Suddenly I started to choke. I fell to the ground and saw that Dionysous had called a strawberry vine to choke me. The harpies tried to come forward but Alex had raised Timmy to them.

"Stop the fighting!" Yelled Chiron. The vine released me and returned to normal size. The harpies backed off and Alex lowered Timmy. Dionysos came and stood next to us. "Peter you must try to understand my overwhelming sympathy for you" said Dionysos. The harpies backed off. " As much as I care for your happiness, I care for your welfare more and I'm afraid I must confine you to camp Half blood." Dionysos said this in his usual sarcastic voice. "If you could die you would be so dead right now" I growled raising Riptide and getting to my feet. He smiled thinly. "Peter you are moron so I will drawl this slowly" said Dionysos. " If you try to attack me I will rip your very mind apart. I did the same to George Bush and he became president. In retrospect that was a mistake. Anyway you aren't thinking logically. If you try to get out you will be attacked by several of Heaptheus's nastiest metal monsters. And your little Ares buddy won't be so lucky with them" he said. Lucky? It must have been the mist that made it look like Alex was the human torch. Or Half Blood torch. Or whatever. "And even if you managed to get out, which you won't , how are you going to find them? You have no idea where to begin , or even any form of motive. And besides , ever single Olympian is searching for the daughter of Zeus. We will find her first." For a long time me and Alex just sat there. It was weird but Alex never got bored. He just looked around him and smiled.

The rest of the cabins showed up pretty soon. The news of the kidnapping spread quickly. Three days. Hades had sent me a message that he and Poseidon are tracking everywhere in the world to try and find Annabeth and Thalia. My dad had a loose theory and it would take him three days to confirm it. It was the beginning of the first banquet and time to see if Alex was a son of Ares. "Why are so worried?" he asked. "Even when I am claimed we can still be friends. Poseidon and Ares are allies , aren't they?" I shuddered slightly. "Uh , Alex, Ares , all his children and even his pet boar wants me dead" I said. "And when a guy has a pet boar" "Named Lemming" interjected Alex. "Named Lemming" I sighed "Trained to kill you on sight , you know he really doesn't like you." Alex looked up. He was always uncomfortable during emotional moments. Or something. "I don't care if Ares hates you. I don't."

I went and sat at my usual place while Alex was being judged by Mr.D. "So Adrian" "Alex" interjected Chiron. "Whatever. Have you been claimed yet?" asked Dionysos. Alex didn't answer. He didn't need to. A boar's head impaled on a spear with gleaming red light appeared in the sky. "Welcome , Alex , son of the God of the tornado and of the uncontrollable urges and hatred we all feel. Welcome son of the war god." Alex numbly went to sit with the other Ares kids. He just didn't fit in. His hands were shaking in anger. This was getting stranger and stranger. After the meal Mr.D. decided to give us his usual "welcome" back speech. "Welcome back" he cheered. "I see that , despite the best efforts of the monsters I sent , you are still all alive. Well , good on you! There will unfortunately be now chariot races in the first two weeks. On a lighter note , I am very pleased to announce that two campers , better known as Annabeth and Thalia, have been kidnapped and possibly murdered. I would like you all to follow their example. Thank you!" A shocked silence followed. Sure we knew he wanted us dead , but he was never so damn direct about it. The meal was completed quickly and I entered a troubled sleep. I kept dreaming of Annabeth and Alex. Annabeth was screaming for me to save her and Alex was saying "What do you mean you forgot the chicken nuggets?" while repeatedly blasting fruit stalls. I ate way to many cheese sandwiches.

The next day I went to get breakfast. I noticed that Alex was sitting alone at the end of the Ares table. I mean with the smell , that was understandable but he also had a black eye. However several of the Ares kids had burn marks and bruises. Nice. Me and Alex trained sword fighting together and even scaled a rock wall. It was annoying with the other Ares's spawn there but I managed to almost enjoy myself. Clarrisse was much nicer to me and that helped. She was also prone to batting her eyebrows , which personally gave me dry heaves. Other that that it was an okay day. Of course the next day we had capture the flag.

Normally I team up with Athena and Hermes , but Alex got me into his team. On our side was everybody but Athena , Hermes and Apollo's children. "Ready?" asked Alex , calmly wrapping his hand in thin bandages. "Are you kidding? This is what I live for" I said. He took out his long sword and I drew Timmy and Riptide. "Any strategy?" I asked. "Not much. See an enemy, bash his head in and steal his shoes. Also you may want to try and get the flag." said Alex. Right. Not much. Everyone started running towards the border except for a few weird guards. "Here we go!" yelled Alex and started sprinting. We ran for about ten minutes until we came towards four Apollo archers. All four of them had their arrows pointed at us. "Take us to your flag you scuzbag!" said the cocky guy from the chariot races. "Scuzbag? Is that even a word?" asked Alex. Unfortunately the cocky guy lost his balance before he could answer. Those damn earthquakes were picking up again. Alex laughed and slashes their bows. "Now you take us to you flag" he said with a smirk on his face and a sword on the other guy's chest. We probably would have captured the flag. But two of the three furies grabbed us and flew off.

We flew for about ten hours. I had now idea where we were. I guessed somewhere around Florida. I chocked somewhat as the shriveled face of Mrs. Dodds appeared before me. "Hush Perseus" she said. Alex was desperately trying to kill the other Kindly one but he wasn't succeeding . "Alex calm down. They may be a pair of shriveled demon grannies, but that's okay. Sure it's a little 1983 but for monsters it works." "We are not here to tell hear your opinion of us" said Mrs. Dodds. "We have taken you do the place your friends are being kept, and have brought supplies for your stay with us." "Annabeth is here?" I breathed. I was ready. "But where is uh, here?" I asked. "This was once a swamp in which great monsters lived. They are still here but now it has changed into the home of just about every monster in the world. The greatest monster home ever! My boy , You are at Disney Land!" said Mrs Dodds.

**Thanks to all my rewievers! I've been trying a new style of writing ,please tell me which one you prefer! I have also started using a spell checker! "M to the EOW" says the Rapper cat.**


	6. Lords of monsterville

**Lords of monsterville**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain.**

Disney Land. The greatest monster home ever. It was started by the most famous son of Apollo. Walt Disney. When he build the park he enlisted the children of Heaphsteus to build the rides and the children of Hades to get the metals required. The scent of so many half bloods attracted large amounts of monsters so the children of Zeus, Athena and Ares were needed to defend the place. That attracted even more monsters so the children of Poseidon used the swamps to build incredible defenses around the place. Thousands flocked to Disney Land so the children of Hermes came to steal things and pick pocket people.Now almost every half blood comes to work in Disney Land in the summer. Back to my Life!

"We are at Disney Land?" I asked. This was getting to weird. "Yes, here are a few things your dads sent. Now, we only know they are here. We know nothing else. Good Luck!" said Mrs. Dodd's and flew away. "Wait!" I yelled. "No time honey, Robbie Williams's new music video is on!" Yelled the other furies. "So even evil demon grannies listen to him?" asked Alex. "Guess so. Lets see what our dads sent.

Ares sent Alex a watch, a stabbing spear, some new clothes and three hundred bucks. My dad sent me some new clothes, a cell phone, jelly beans and two envelopes. The first one contained some cash and a warning not to open the other one before Alex. We quickly went over and paid for two tickets. For the first time , I was in Disney Land. Now normal people see a giant amusement park. Me and Alex saw so much mist and monsters that we trip and fell into several people. "This is hopeless. There is no way we will find them." said Alex. So far we had been trapped several times in various places. "Put your hands under the table and spread your legs. Your ass is mine..." said a voice behind us. A definitely male voice. A voice that sounded like an old smoker. I turned and bowed to the smith god. Alex reluctantly did the same.

"First off , don't bow and scrape to me. And call me Vulcan." said Heaphsteus. Weird. I had always pictured him as an angry short tempered guy, but he was really laid back. He wore jeans and a pink T-shirt behind his tight leather apron. His flaming red hair was pulled back into a ponytail. "Right" I said. "Lord Vulcan" "Just Vulcan Percy." "Okay Vulcan. Can you help us? We are searching for two other half bloods. A daughter of Zeus and a daughter of Athena." Heaphsteus gestured for us to follow. "Kid, if they are here there is only one place they can be. I haven't checked but hey, what you gonna do?" He didn't seem to care that neither me or Alex were really listening. "Sorry about sending out Talos. But Dionysus, made me an offer I couldn't refuse. For a personal McDonald's, I said no. For five tons of gold, I said no. But an entire apartment building filled with Sprite, just how could I say no?" "I have no idea. My life certainly isn't worth that much" I said sarcastically. "Don't worry about the damage done to Talos" he went on unhindered. "I am repairing him. In a week he will be back to killing all who the people who give me Sprite say should be killed by him!" "You have an incredible way with words" said Alex also sarcastically. "Will you believe you are the only sober person who ever told me that? I mean I know my wife has been cheating on me for the past two thousand years, but I can't be that uninteresting, I mean" "Make it stop, Make it go away" I moaned. "Vulcan listen closely." said Alex. Heaphsteus turned to face him. "Please in the name of all that is good and holy ,shut up!" said Alex. "Where was I? All right , I mean it must be her, not me and sure I did force her to marry me but" Okay this had gone on long enough. "I know the guy was thrown out of Olympus by his mom but I didn't think he would be this annoying" whispered Alex. "Did you say some thing about my mom?" asked Heaphsteus, eyes murderous. Never look into a god's eyes. You will see terrible things. I saw people burning to death, metal masks molding on to their faces and chocking them to death, volcano's killing thousands. I know it's unwise to insult a god but I had enough. "Vulcan listen closely." I cupped my hands to my mouth and yelled as hard as I could. "I said , **your mom is a man!"**

Now that was officially the stupidest thing I have ever done. Not only did Heaphsteus call fire down upon me and Alex, I also insulted the wife of Zeus. Never anger a god of fire. "Your insolence will be ended" yelled Heaphsteus. He no longer looked so calm. His body was cloaked in flames, his hair stood wildly and lava danced around him. In his hands he held a double headed hammer. "Over there" muttered Alex. He pointed to a hole in the wall. "It leads to a labyrinth. Annabeth and Thalia are kept there." "Well I guess this is it" I said. I grabbed Riptide and moved forward towards Heaphsteus. "Percy I am sorry" said Alex. Suddenly I felt like a very big , very angry hellhound had rammed me. I flew towards the hole and landed a safe distance away. Alex drew his black blade. Heaphsteus laughed. He raised his hammer and brought it down hard. I mean I could feel the air splitting under the hammer. However Alex blocked the hammer with his sword. "I think it's time you realize something" said Alex coldly. And I mean coldly. His eyes turned red with fire and long cracks appeared on his arm. Heaphsteus seemed unbothered however and blasted some more flames at him. The fire didn't even burn Alex's clothing. " You wield the fire, I _am_ the fire!" The black blade burned white hot and with one slash the Hammer broke. With the next Heaphsteus retreated. Not even a god could stand up to whatever Alex was.

Alex changed and suddenly looked like he normally did when he came back. He looked completely unfazed. "Now that was intense" he said. "Got lucky again. What did you see in the mist?" he asked. Not this was going to far. The mist may distort my few a little, but twice in the same way? Something was wrong here. I guess my expression showed on my face, cause Alex then said "Come on. We have to go get your friends" He had me there. Nothing was stopping me from seeing Annabeth again. Even if it meant trusting flame boy.

When you think labyrinth (Why you would think it I have no idea) you think scary walls with low ,dripping torches. This was nothing like that. It had artfully painted walls, soft carpets and electric lights in the ceiling. Why would anyone waste money on such a place? Simple. It was half blood heaven. After walking for two hours we came upon a bar obviously meant for half bloods and immortals. "Nice" said Alex, looking around happily. "They have nectar! Yo , barkeep! Give me a standard nectar and keep them coming." I punched Alex on the shoulder. "We are not supposed to be drinking nectar in this bar! We should be roughing up the patrons until we find out what they know!" I said. Alex calmly sipped his fourth nectar. And the barkeep gave him another one. Two reasons why Alex shouldn't be able to enjoy his drinks. One, more than two cups of nectar and a half blood starts to get a free cremation. Four and there won't even be any ashes. However Alex was calmly drinking hot liquid death like it was Diet Coke with Lemon. Two, the barkeeper was so uglier than Mrs. Dodd's. No, that is an understatement. He looked like the result, of what happens when a man loves a rabbit way, _way_ too much. "Right!" said Alex and proceeded to punch the barkeep in the face. "Tell me where the half blood are being kept!" "Security!" yelled the barkeep. We were then grabbed by two massive trolls. The nectar had a bad effect on Alex, because he didn't seem quite capable of controlling his strength. Together we were dragged off.

Alex took a while to get out of his groggy state. We were dragged of to cold cells that were dripping. A harpy came to talk to us. "Perseus Jackson and Alexis Hemmingfeild?" asked the harpy. "That's us" I said. "Right. You are here by charged , with insulting Hera, assaulting Heaphsteus and leaving camp half blood without permission. We also have reason to believe that you are a frequent jay walker. For this, you must die!" "For what? Jay walking?" asked Alex. "No ,for your crimes against the reigning gods! Honestly, I am so going to enjoy eating you" "You are going to eat us?" I gasped. "Not you too! With all you half bloods it is the same. No, I don't want to be eaten, I want an open casket" she whined. "Okay then. Where are we?" I asked. This was going to be a long day. "You are at the remains of Atlantis."

Atlantis. Why couldn't I remember anything about Atlantis? Alex had stood up. The nectar had worn off then. "You know what this means?" he asked. "We can sell my entire life story to a novelist?" Alex sighed. "No. This means your two friends must be here. Atlantis is the perfect place." "Why?" I asked. "Because Atlantis has a library that is impenetrable. It's doors are god proof. They are made by adamantine. Only a mortal can open them." "Right" I said. "How to we get out?" "I have no idea" said Alex. Annabeth was here. All that was standing between us was some stupid cell door. The guards had left our weapons with us. I carefully drew Timmy.. "You know, the bars in this cell are made of an adamantine mix. There is no way you are shattering them." I swung with all the strength my rage gave me. See, Zeus, with his fancy lightning and other power was the most powerful god, but physically, Poseidon was strongest. When I swung , the bars held. The ground it was cemented in didn't. The completely undamaged cell door hit the wall with a loud bang.

"That was impressive." said Alex a minute later. "Whatever. Where is the library?" Alex looked around and found a sign. "I have no idea" he said looking at the sign. "What do you mean?" I asked. "The sign says the library is that way" I said. The sign said that, with a coral arrow to point in the direction. "You serious" he asked. "It all looks like squibbels to me" "No it is clearly defined letters" I said tiring of his game. "It's not even playing up with my dyslexia." Alex looked at me with wide eyes. "Percy only you can read this" he said. "Like I said before whatever. Lets go." Some claim adamantine doors are near impossible to open. I was ready to bash it in when Alex suggested using the handle. We went in calmly.

The first thing I saw was hundreds of bookshelves. Annabeth was reading one of the books looking a little thinner that usual. "Hello Wise girl" I said smiling down at her. Annabeth immediately jumped up and hugged me. Only this time she held on. Alex looked away and saw Thalia. "You okay?" he asked. "I'm fine" she said. "Annabeth let go of seaweed brain. We have to tell him, remember?" she said. Annabeth had tears in her eyes when she looked up. "Percy, this is a , a " "A trap" finished Thalia. "Me and Annabeth figured it all out. They brought us here to get you to come here. At first they wanted to capture you but something kept them away. They even sent some minor gods but they could even get close." "But why do they want to capture me?" I asked. I reluctantly let go of Annabeth. "Because of this. They said only you will be able to read it." She pointed to a tablet with some writing on it. "Two questions" I said. "One, why didn't you just open the door and leave, two why am I the only one who can read this stuff?" "One answer" said Thalia. "You are the son of Poseidon. This is Atlantis. The weird fishy language you speak is used here. This entire fortress was build for the children of Poseidon under his orders. It obeys your whims. No one else's" said Thalia. "Right" I said and walked off towards the tablet. Here is more or less what stood there.

_The world was divided in three after the fall of the titans. Hades , became the dark lord, ruler of the dead. Zeus, the ruler of all, king of the sky. And our lord Poseidon watches over the sea. However Poseidon wishes to have all , and If the beast awakens all may come to him. The slayer of gods and titans, the ancient warrior known as Okeanos ,Kronos's own brother. This , for lack of a better word Titan, is known as the doom of all. The destruction he wrecked caused his own father, Oranos to imprison him forever. He was cast back, in adamantine chains, which none save a half blood could break. However the beast would be indebted to the warrior and his father if he is freed and a prophecy will be made. At the age of sixteen a son of Poseidon will use his last breath to either free Okeanos or slay Kronos forever. How he will do this remains a mystery. However we have no way of predicting what the prophecy will dictate or how they will see it. So our doom is-_

I remember what Annabeth said about the future and how I would try to change it. I was not going to allow that to happen. However I couldn't read further because I was interrupted. By Luke, Ares and Heaphsteus who looked kinda bruised. Ares smirked. "You should have known Perseus, a god proof door only works when it is closed."

**Reviewing is optional but recommended. As for flames, they make me burn like when I pee.**


	7. Fire Water Burn

**Fire Water Burn**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordian**

Have you ever felt trapped? I don't mean a couple of guys have ganged up on you and you know your arms will get cramps if you beat them all up. No , I mean you are trapped by a guy you know will beat you , and two immortal gods, one with a massive hammer who you just insulted, assaulted and is now surrounded by automations. For those who don't know, automations are men made of metal. And the other immortal has two very violent boars and a very, _very_ long sword. That kind of trapped. Back to my life!

"Oh no" said Annabeth who had turned very pale. "We..." "No. Let me be the one to say it." I cut in. "Shit!" "As much as we care about your troubles" began Luke. "We really must be going. So why don't you tell us where Okeanos is and how to free him, and we'll kill you quickly. Otherwise I could get messy. And painful." Thalia drew her sword. "Ahhh! My hand!" she screamed. "Hello, god of fire" said Heapsteus. "You might as well give up. You can't even hold your weapons." For the third time I watched Alex draw his black blade. "You really could have phrased that better" he said. "You! I have no idea what you did but you won't be so lucky this time!" Why was I the only one who could see Alex like he is when he fights? Only Ares seemed to be able to do that too. The fire in his eyes went out. He actually seemed to tremble. "It can't be. You, you can't be here!" he roared. Rage was replacing fear but he still looked ready to piss himself. "Well, I am here but soon, you won't be." Alex then jumped and delivered a flying kick to Heapsteus, who flew back and hit a pillar. It's times like these you should be worried. Your normal friend can apparently beat up gods like they are boy band members. And not the "good" ones but the others. Ares was panicking. He snapped his fingers and a boar appeared. The boar ran of towards Alex. "A pet pig? How original! Say hello to Eddie!" Alex snapped his own fingers and a Raven with a flaming beak appeared and stuck his beak into the boars neck. Now my friend has god powers. How to I explain that to his mom? Something like, sorry Mrs, but your son is quite possibly the most destructive force to ever walk the earth. Is that fresh pie I smell? Any way, Alex wasn't done...

Ever seen the Matrix? Well Alex did something like that next. Luke was punched back into a wall while Ares was slashing everything that moved with his swords. Alex swung on his own sword and did that weird pole thing , knocking back both the Automations and the other two battle boars. Ares stood defiantly. "You may think you have won, but I can run! Really fast!" He then grabbed Luke and fled. Alex then sheathed his swords. "Immortals. They just don't make them like they used to" said Alex. I stepped forward. "I think I speak for all of us when I say , who or what the hell are you?" Alex smiled thinly. "I think it's time you know who you are talking too. I am Prometheus, the titan to who you owe all civilization. I'm still trying to get a patent." Annabeth was first to speak. "You are Prometheus? But aren't you supposed to be chained to a cliff while an eagle eats your liver?" Alex , or Prometheus, smiled even thinner. "I used to be. It's thanks to Luke that I'm out. He weakened the gods enough for Hades to be able to free me." Thalia spoke next. "But what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be helping Kronos? No offence." For the safety of the authors fingers I'm just going to call him Alex. Alex answered coolly. "Listen mortal, I was chained to a rock for over twenty thousand years while an eagle eats my constantly regenerating liver. But that is not what pissed me off. When we came to America I asked for a view of the statue of liberty. What to I get? A view of the city! And the smog. It is like taking five packs a day! I have my health to think about you know!" "Uh., you are not really answering my question" said Thalia. Alex sighed. "The point I'm trying to make is, that I went through all that crap to ensure civilization started. I'm no going to let Kronos rip it apart!" For the first time, I spoke. "But why follow me around?" "Because I'm the only one who sees the big picture. Sure Hades does, but he won't tell anyone. He is going to try and solve the threat of Kronos by himself." "And what is the big picture?" asked Annabeth. "Mortals. No sense of perspective" said Alex. "Think about this. Together Zeus, Hades and Poseidon are so powerful that the ripped the titans to shreds, reunited all the creatures the titans scattered and even saved humanity from them. Your friend Luke is only planning on bringing one titan back. Why to you think this is a threat if the big three, together can rip him to shreds?" We all looked at him blankly. "It means that the big three are no longer united."

Okay that is officially not good. But what felt worse was the feeling of betrayal. This is what my mother meant. Hades was never the traitor. He did his own thing, and while he constantly complained, he liked it. Zeus ,being the king of just about everything had nothing to gain by freeing Kronos. Only my father had anything to gain. "So what? What are you going to do?" I asked angrily. "Percy you don't have to feel too bad. Zeus has not been the best ruler" At this, Thalia's expression darkened. "Don't you remember? When Olympus was divided between those who favor Zeus and Poseidon , Poseidon had more support. There are far more traitor gods than you can guess." "How many?" asked Annabeth. "So far on Poseidon's side there is Ares, Heapsteus, Aphrodite, Apollo and Demeter. On Zeus's side we have Hera, Artemis, Hermes, Dionysos and Athena. And then there's me and Hades. We are lurking behind the scenes trying to find a side. And rest assured the side we pick, will win" Alex finished this confidently, as if he talked about wars that could rip apart mankind as we know it everyday. "Wait" said Thalia. "So Percy's father is responsible for all this?" I turned to face her. "Who my father fights for this matter. I fight for me and my friends." Alex cleared his throat. "Percy I think you should finish reading your little tablet." I reluctantly continued my vivid reading of the doom of us all.

_-Our doom is right beneath us. That is the reason the library is impenetrable, not the knowledge it contains. Behind the forth bookshelf lies the passage. Under no circumstances are any to pass through it. The last four hundred went. Only seven returned, myself being one of them. The beast is beyond anything I have ever seen. It's seems to consist entirely of dead grey skin with it's bright blue eyes. It has now mercy, nor the capacity to even understand what the term means. After it realized we wouldn't free it, it yelled. The sheer force of the sound crushed bones and ended lives. From his mouth came a tongue, covered in mold to eagerly scoop up the bodies it felled. It seemed to use his very voice crush his prey, rather than chewing it. Under no conditions should the beast ever be freed. According to our reports it took the combined efforts of Oranos, Kronos and Prometheus to chain the beast. And they had to resort to trickery. Let the beast rot. Never stir it. Never even go do it, for it shall claim you for itself._

_-Agrripe, Priest of Hades._

"Done?" asked Alex. I nodded numbly. It now made sense. The only reason there is even a passage, is because Poseidon wanted one. "Then let the fall of the sea god begin..."

**This will be the shortest chapter in the story. Thanks to Ivy Darklight, Tigster 5 and Becky for reviewing!**


	8. Roundhouse kick to the face

**Roundhouse kick to the face...Of reality**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain.**

You know what I hate? The obvious. In every game, book, anything Poseidon always was the traitor. The sea god always took extreme vengeance on those who betrayed them. Now I've lost the only god who ever protected me and my new cell phone. I also have over six gods who want me dead. Not a good week. And now suddenly my only friend for the past year turns out to be the fifth most powerful being in existence. I had nothing to lose, and even less to gain. Knowing your fate always means wanting to change it. I did not know my fate but I wasn't going to live longer than sixteen years. Back to my life!

"You know, when you think about it, this plot doesn't make any real sense" said Annabeth. We all turned to look at her. In life and death situations, she is the only person I know who will criticize the gods trying to kill her. " They could have just gotten any son of Poseidon to free Okeanos and destroy the gods years ago. Why wait until Poseidon wasn't allowed to have any more children?" Alex stepped up again. "Because of the defenses on the passageway. Poseidon build a passage to lead there but, the entrance to Okeanos's prison is protected by the most powerful Titans. Kronos , ensured the wrath of the earth will kill all those who enter. Gaia placed lightning rods in front of the main doors. And Oranos did the unthinkable." "What did he do? Make the door not exist? Then again, if they wanted to keep him there for all eternity, why do they even need a door?" asked Annabeth. It was then I realized I hated logic. "Yes. At the moment the door doesn't exist. Oranos, being the titan of time , made the door exist only exist once every four thousand years. I'm afraid Percy," He turned to me. "I'm afraid your father planned your birth to perfectly fit Oranos's final defence. Check the date on the plague."

_This account, while it's content is questionable, is the only explanation we have ever had as to why there is a passage there. Some sons of Poseidon brave the dangers of the passage only to find no entrance what so ever. It is believed that the chamber could only be accessed on a specific date, but no prove has ever been collected. For those who wish to brave the dangers and attempt to discover the truth, the date of Agrripe's expedition was September 15 , year 18795._

_Tobago- Priest of Poseidon._

"Yes, the day is my birthday" I said. It was weird, but my anger was sort of numb. I really did not want to know what would happen when I snap. " Uh, Alex?" began Annabeth hesitantly. "Yes?" he asked. "Uh, I just want to know what hero did Hades use to free you?" She probably didn't really trust Hades yet. As for Thalia, thunder blossomed in her eyes whenever Hades was mentioned. Alex however , finally seemed to be happy again. "His last surviving and greatest ever son. Chuck Norris!" Oh great. Well, at least I know why Alex makes so many Chuck Norris jokes. "Chuck Norris went to camp half blood?" asked Thalia looking mildly interested. Oh crap. Another thing I hate: When I make lightning fast connections. "Uh guys" I began. "If Heapsteus is a traitor and his metal monsters are guarding the camp.." "This time I'll say it" said Annabeth. "Shit!"

Alex's eyes went wide and he grabbed his friends. Yes, literally. He grabbed Annabeth and Thalia in on hand and me in the other. He gave a great jump into the hallway and pointed up. A hole appeared and he jumped through it, taking us with him. The hole closed up behind us too. I guess being the supreme leader of all buildings allows him to do such things. "Annabeth do you and Thalia have your weapons?" I asked. "No, they took my my knife and Thalia's sword. One guard also tried to take my number" said Annabeth. Alex then dropped me , quickly handed his normal sword to Annabeth and caught me again. I calmly handed Timmy to Thalia. While Timmy might be a better sword , I liked Riptide. It was the sword my father gave me , and the sword that would end Kronos.

For the second time , I returned to camp half blood and it was under attackby Heapsteus's metal monsters. This is what makes you wonder why Zeus allows all this crap to happen. "Oh crap, it seems Talos is back" Alex said thinly. While most of the monsters had trouble getting through the campers lines of defense Talos simply walked through. You can't really blame the campers for running away "Ready Percy?" asked Alex. "Ready for what?" I asked. "Guess not" said Alex and through me the length of a football field and onto Talos shoulder. Okay , I'm fifty feet in the air and I have no time to admire the view. Also , Talos could jump. Really far. I plunged Riptide into his shoulder and held on. The second we were back on the ground I ran towards his neck and started hacking. "Die mortal!" yelled the automation and swung one giant hand on to his shoulder. I was knocked back but managed to stick Riptide in his shoulder blade. This time I had a little time to admire the view. Most of the campers were wounded and one guy looked pretty much dead. Alex was blasting metal monsters away but he was stopped. By Apollo. Things were not good. Time to finish up bronze guy.

Ever played prince of Persia? While that's kind of how this trick worked. I used one had to hold on to Riptide and then ran across the shoulder blade, removing Riptide from Talos. I had one chance , and I was taking it. I threw Riptide straight into Talos's waiting neck. Of course that meant losing my grip on Talos. And that meant falling fifty feet. I also seemed to begetting an answer to the eternal question: What falls faster? A giant bronze man or a half blood? Answer: Me. I fell for a while and then fell through my cabin roof and unto my bed. Of course Talos crushed the other half of my cabin but I had other things to worry about. I ran back towards the battle.

Things were not going to well. Annabeth and Thalia were finishing one last bronze boar while Alex was taking on three gods at once. Apollo , Demeter and Ares were all attacking the last titan. "Where is Mr.D?" I yelled at Annabeth. "Alex can't do this by himself!" Thalia drove Timmy through the boars neck. "Mr.D is down. He kept these three out of camp half blood for as long as he could , but they wounded him badly." Okay that made no sense. " Why would Mr.D risk himself for us?" I asked. "Percy use your seaweed brain. Every half blood who Kronos gets gives him another body part back. If Mr.D let all these campers get captured..." "Fine! What do we do now?" I asked. It was Thalia who answered. She was looking angrily at all three of the gods who had assembled. "They are gods Percy. We fight for them , but we can't fight against them." That wasn't going to stop me from trying.

To say Alex was outnumbered was right. To say he was overpowered wasn't. He seemed to be holding his own. He delivered a roundhouse kick to Ares's face. Demeter shot a blue bolt at him but he swallowed it up in a black bolt of his own. The real problem was Apollo. He kept firing death arrows at Alex making it difficult for Alex do move. Alex's black blade was fired up. Ares kept trying to keep him busy long enough for Demeter or Apollo to get a shot in but he wasn't having much luck. My problem was this: A god can kill a half blood simply by pointing at him. " Annabeth , what is Alex's symbol of power?" I asked. I read , as hard as that is to believe , somewhere that a god gained maximum power while fighting with his symbol. That's why Zeus was so angry when his Master Bolt was stolen. Annabeth thought for a while. "Percy his symbol is a flaming spear. It has something to do with him bringing fire to civilization" Right. I know Clarrisse has a spear. It's mugging time.

Clarrisse was one of the more powerful half bloods. She usually led the campers in battles. However she never liked me, nor have I ever liked her. So I doubt she would've gotten me a "Kudos" award for saving the camp. "Hey seaweed brain" she called. "You were late" I didn't have a good answer for that. I calmly kicked her in the shin. "Percy why did you kick me in the shin you coward?" she yelled and twirled her spear. "Sorry!" I said and drove Riptide's hilt into her mid section. "Percy I'm going to kill you , get Hades to send you back , rip out your internal organs and then do a little happy dance while you bleed to death!" Thankfully she did what I thought she would. In her anger she dropped her spear and prepared to pummel me with he fists. I grabbed her spear and whacked her feet out from under her with it. I now had a spear. All I needed was a way to set it on fire. Then I remembered Alex was the lord of fire. "Alex" I yelled. "Catch!" Alex turned and jumped in the air , blocking projectiles with one hand while holding the other hand ready to catch the spear. I threw the spear and then it hit me, I can't aim. The spear swerved out. "Hit a tree! Hit a spot close to Alex! Hit Thalia!" I yelled at the spear. "Hey! said Thalia. The spear however had found it's mark Or something very close to it. "Oops! Sorry Grover!"

Alex quickly plucked the spear out of Grover's body. Thankfully it appeared to only be a flesh wound. "It's over!" yelled Alex. The point of the spear caught fire. He had his black blade in one hand and the spear in the other. Ares was already planning on running. Demeter was first to fall. Alex threw the spear straight at her. She seemed to turn the spear back into a plant when she realized something else. Alex had used the distraction to get close to her. And not in a good way. With one slash she was down. Ares had ran away and Apollo was all alone. He plucked four golden arrows at once but it wasn't enough. Alex raised his hand. A black ball of light flew out and hit Apollo in the chest. "You will not win titan!" yelled Apollo. "We will chain you to that rock again! You will not succeed. In the end we will win. _That_ is the future, I promise you!" I averted my eyes as Apollo reverted to his true form. Gold light appeared and the sun god left. Annabeth lightly poked me in the shoulder. "Come on, we have to go see Mr.D."

Mr.D had looked better. He was sweating and Chiron was attending to him.Alex came back into the big house in human form and took a seat at the card table. "Right , we now have six. Anyone up for a game of spades?" he asked before sitting down in his chair. "Hello Prometheus. I bid five" said Mr.D not really looking at Alex."I put seven" said Alex. Alex took up his hand and put down the three of harts. "I think you can see the situation has changed" said Alex. Mr.D put down a jack and won the trick. "Yes, the gods are now in open war. We cannot win this way. Indecently , you cannot win Spades that way either" said Mr.D putting down the king of hearts. Alex fiddled with his cards a little. None of us had even tried interrupting. "Maybe , maybe not. My way means sacrificing the weakest so the strongest can come" He put down the two of spades, and won that trick. Mr.D looked up. "If you mean decreasing the power of the gods so the titans you trust can return, you are insane. Zeus will never allow it." Alex placed the queen of diamonds on the table. "The gods are in open revolt. I don't see how decreasing their powers to allow others , who will be loyal , to return can be bad." Mr.D placed the King of Diamonds on the table. " The gods can never trust the titans. Your punishment was unfair. In the end your gift turned out to be , a gift to all. We should have freed you then , but Zeus thought it safer that you remain chained up. Chuck Norris did well against the guardians huh , _Alex_?" Dionysius spat out Alex's chosen name and put down the king of spades. I don't think either of them were concentrating on the game anymore. "Yes he did. But you must remember there is one titan who can unite all." Alex put down the ace of Spades. "And he is coming back" Mr.D put the cards away. "Listen Prometheus we all know Kronos is coming back." For the first time since I knew him , Alex's smile looked evil. "Oh but I'm not talking about Kronos..."

**I've been taking a lot of time trying to find the grammatical errors , so if you find any can you please tell me what they are? It would be really appreciated. Thanks for all the reviews! **


	9. Mother Nature and Father Time

**Mother Nature and Father Time**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain. Note: Due to a review I changed the way the story in written. Please tell me which one is preferable.**

Nature at war with itself. The war had officially began. The sky was again fighting the sea. But this time , things were different. Last time , it was between the two brothers. This time, everybody is in the fight. The Ares and Apollo kids were beating up everyone who tried to support Zeus. That didn't really bother me. What did bother me was that I was seen as their leader. Again I was getting blamed for something I didn't do. Back to my life!

Mr. D looked mildly surprised. " You are going to bring Oranos back right?"

Now a bit of history: Oranos is the father of all gods and titans. He was also really evil. And a terrible dancer.

"Yes" said Alex. "He is the only option left. You require power , he has it. And he will never side with Kronos so we don't have to worry about betrayal"

"Uh ,excuse me but why won't he side with Kronos?" asked Annabeth.

Mr. D answered. " Girl , Kronos chopped his father into hundreds of pieces, and let them bleed until dry in the forest of the dryads. He then threw the pieces in the see for sharks to eat." Woah. The greek gods sure had nice ways to kill their parents.

"Okay" said Annabeth. "But even if Oranos helps us , won't he turn on us the second Kronos is defeated?"

"Yes he will. But Oranos knows that on his own he won't be a match for the might of me, Zeus and Hades"

Annabeth nodded , but I knew she was still thinking fast. I had come to my own conclusion. Alex intended to take my Dad's throne for himself

"Your plan may work" said Dionysus. "But you forget one thing. One , Zeus won't allow it. Two, you have absolutely no chance of surviving the forests."

"The forests may have changed" said Alex.

"Whatever" said Mr. D. "Give me three days. I'll need help defending the camp until then. Another thing" said Dionysus and fixed Alex with his best stare. I didn't even want to know what Alex saw in Dionysus's eyes.

"Proving you can kill humans like that doesn't scare me" said Alex quietly.

" I don't care if it doesn't scare you. I don't care if nothing scares you. I want you to remember, you can't defy everyone. You can't defeat everything. Prometheus , you have to remember , we are immortal , but we can be destroyed."

I had no idea what he meant by that. Alex just grinned cockily. It hit me then that this was Prometheus, the one from the myths. The one who was considered to be completely insane. The one who flew to the sun. The one who saved humanity four times from the wrath of the titans. I know he was always that ,but it's weird thinking of your gym partner that way.

" Alex , why do you care so much about humanity?" asked Annabeth. Then it hit me. The thing that made Alex so much different that the other Greek gods. He lived more like a human than a god. He hanged out in malls, listened to punk rock and playing computer games. He was entirely un godlike.

"I always assumed it was just stupidity" said Mr. D.

Alex smiled sadly. 'No, it's kind of long story. See , back in the time of Oranos, humans were entertainment or food to the titans. Often both. Then the unthinkable happened. Oranos , the legendry father of all gods , fell in love with a mortal woman. He was the first titan to fall in love with with a mortal. The woman gave birth to twins. Two boys. One named Thryanes, the other Prometheus. Now you know sometimes mortals gave birth to pure gods? That's what happened to me. But not to my brother. I became the third most powerful titan and he was the first half blood. He protected the early human settlements from monsters and was lauded like a hero. I later went to visit him. He was a lot like your friend Luke. He asked Me what the titans were doing to help anyone but themselves, if Oranos ever bothered to acknowledge he had a half blood son. I told him I would kill him then and there if he did not shut up. He didn't. I blew up the entire village. But he still had time for some last words. You are now worthy of the name Titan. After that I wanted nothing more to do with the titans. I knew my brother was right. Then Kronos came to me and told me he thinks Oranos should be overthrown. I helped him. But Kronos was even worse than Oranos. So I also helped Zeus get rid of Kronos."

A look of understanding past Thalia's face. "You aren't just bringing Oranos back to get rid of Kronos. You also want to avenge yourself on him." said Thalia. Alex nodded.

"Like I said. Stupidity." said Mr. D.

I guess I learned a lot from that conversation. Thalia was still angry at her Dad and Hades. It was one of those reverse sitations. I was the son of Poseidon and I was standing by Zeus. Thalia was his daughter and she hated him. We started walking off towards the camp's dining area. The satyrs had told us Mr D had a special announcement to make.

Alex was sitting at my table as usual. Thalia also came over. She always ate way to little. And Alex. He probably tries to eat everything that doesn't move. Me and Thalia were arguing about what the greatest rock song ever was when Mister D interrupted.

"I still say it's wait and bleed" said Thalia.

"Hush now my children" said Mr. D. "The time for speech making is nigh. So shut up. As some of you may have noticed , especially the losers who were grievously injured , camp half blood was attack earlier by three gods who wished to burn the camp to the ground and kill all those who resist. And while I normally support such behavior I can't stand for it at the present. It has been decided that all the children of the traitors gods are to be eaten by hellhounds."

Well, that caused a bit of a stir. Clarrisse, who normally would be making obscene hand gestures looked scared and reached for something under her camo jacket.

"Just Kidding" said Mr. D.

Clarrisse's hand came back up. I saw a flash of something silvery. If she is a traitor what would she have done? What can she do?

"As there is no prove you are as traitorous as the scum you call your parents , you must live. Furthermore , due to the strength of the new attackers we will be imposing new security. For the next three days Prometheus will be guarding the camp with me. Don't worry kids he has very bad judgment. You can see that due to the fact he chose to guard this camp and he is sitting with Peter. Also , after the three days we will have a new guardian none other than-

Dionysus was cut off. Once more I felt the aching coldness. The hopelessness and fear that comes with the lord of the dead. Hades walked up to Dionysus's table. Chiron bowed respectfully while the satyrs tried to stop their hands from shaking. Hades was probably the most feared god. He looked scary at the moment. His long black hair was flowing over his black t-shirt that had the Slipnot slogan in blue letters. He looked a lot more like Thalia's father than Zeus did. Of course that might just be the taste in music.

"Right. And now Lord Hades has a few words for you" said Mr. D

Hades smiled widely. "Hello young heroes. You may be asking yourselves why I was chosen to be in charge of your safety. But , who better to keep you alive than the lord of the dead? And while I offer handsome rewards for your souls remember this. If you are dead you can't join Kronos. That is the kind of decisive action that kept on my throne all these years. Any questions?" Even Annabeth looked a bit thrown off. However a girl in Aphrtodite's cabin raised her hand.

"Mr . Hades are you aware that rock sucks?" she asked. "R en B is so much better." She was obviously not the brightest knife in the murder victim. Insulting Hades's music choice's.

Hades looked up. Golden fire appeared in his eyes along with other visions. The girl was already terriefied. "Foolish Mortal!" yelled Hades. "No one says R en B on! Rock lives!"

"Hell yeah!" said Thalia, jumping up from her seat. "Hades favors rock!"

"Rock on!" yelled Hades making the classic finger symbol. He then suddenly realized what he was doing. "Uhm, yes. Any other questions?" No one had any more questions. I went of to my cabin for the night.

The next morning was pretty weird. Hades kept summoning more and more of his monsters to guard the camp.

"Good Morning" said Annabth sleepily.

"Good morning to you to" I answered. "Quick question. Is Hades trying to get the monsters who really want to kill us , to protect us?"

Annabeth rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Hades suggested it and Dionysus supported it. That along with the traitor gods turned the vote to allow it."

Alex and Thalia had also gotten up. "Well, I see Hades knows of the attack. So you guys should too" said Alex. "On the last day , before Hades reinforces the borders,the traitor gods will make one final strike. So far we know everyone but Poseidon will be there. So get ready." Three days. And my father was to scared to even show up. "However they don't know Hades is here" said Alex. "It will be over all to quickly."

The next three days were just about like any other days in camp half blood. I trained with Annabeth and Thalia while Alex did "god" work. That's what he called it when he and Dionysus played card games. The had finished with Spades , and went on to Yu-Gi-Oh. Then Magic the gathering. You had to wonder where Mr. D got all those cards. Alex woke as for the next attack on camp half blood.

We were all kitted out in old Greek armor. Annabeth had a blue plume on top of her helmet to represent Athena. Thalia had a white one for Zeus. I was wearing a black and red one. It represented Alex. Mr. D came walking out in his muscled up form. He had a silver disc in the one hand. Alex came in his black jeans and red t-shirt. He had his black blade in one hand and a flaming spear in the other hand. Hades came next. He wore flowing black robes and a black silk vest. Silver armor plates were arranged across his chest. He also carried a long scythe. I guess this was how the "Grim Reaper" thing started. "And now" said Alex "It's time to kick some immortal ass"

Demeter came first. She stood at the edge of the camp , her shield raised protectively. Apollo took up a firing position on a nearby hill. Aphrodite, Ares and Heaphsteus were at the other edge of the camp. It was on. Dionysus made the first move. He threw the silver disc straight at Ares ,who caught it. But that meant his hands were full and he couldn't stop the other disc. Hades had disappeared. He had changed into darkness. Alex then ran straight at Demeter. With one fluid motion he brought down on her. She simply pulled her shield up. It knocked Alex high into the air and also into the firing line of Apollo , who shot four arrows at him. Hades struck then. And I mean struck. With one slash both Heaphsteus and Aphrodite were down. He then shot a column of golden fire at Apollo. Apollo blocked it but let his guard down. Hades disappeared again. Alex didn't actually have to worry. Dionysus brought two of the arrows down with his discs. Alex then came down hard on Demeter who threw him off. She however , forgot about Dionysus who nailed her. Apollo ran. Hades then appeared next to us.

"Now my warriors" he said addressing us. "You have to go. Alex is waiting. Remember Percy, the forests of the dryads are about us safe as a boy band fan at an Iron Maiden concert. Don't worry. Me and D will be fine. Bye!" Hades really wasn't one for goodbyes. He simply picked us up and threw us to Alex , who started flying towards the fabled forest of the dryads.

We arrived three hours later. Alex took us to the entrance where we were greeted. By a dryad. Now a dryad is a monstrous beast with goat legs and a demonic torso. But this one was in a white suit. With a pink shirt underneath.

"Welcome to the forests of the dryads" said the demon goat , who I guess was the greeter. Hmm. Weird. They usually put attractive people at these sort of positions. Although his suit was _very_ nice I, wait. What am I thinking? "Our attractions are the Mares of Diomedes and the grove where Oranos bled to death..."


	10. Inevitable return of the great Jeff!

**Inevitable return of the great Jeff!**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordian. Also, I kinda made up Prometheus's history. **

The forests of the dryads. The very place where Oranos bled to death. It was also the location of every immortal feast. It would be a "touristy" location if not for the demons, harpies and of course, the centaurs. They tend to be a mood killer. What's more these were the forests that supplied Luke with his warriors. So they all had to die. Back to my Life!

"We also have a four star restaurant , but that was discrimination. Just because we eat all our meat raw he subtracted half a star. He then subtracted the other half when we ate him." continued the Dryad. "And you ladies are in luck" he said pointing to Thalia and Annabeth. "Adonis is here. It's Aphrodite's turn and she took him here."

"Uh , Alex , isn't Adonis dead" I asked.

"Yeah, technically" said Alex. "But he made a deal with Aphrodite. Half the year he is alive, the other half he is dead and with Hades's wife , Persephone or something."

"Wait , the guy is fooling around with two gods's wives? I asked. Normally I would have applauded this kind of thing but at the moment it seemed unfair.

"Yep. Been going on for about two thousand years." said Alex. "I guess you hate him already?" he asked. "Oh No" he suddenly breathed. "There he is" said Alex pointing towards a tall guy.

Annabeth just couldn't stop staring at the guy. I don't know why , but I suddenly felt insanely jealous of the guy. I wanted to rip his carefully gelled hair and beat him to death with it. Looks wise, this guy was like a cross between Johnny Depp and Brad Pit. He was wearing white pants with a sky blue shirt. It was easy to see I wasn't the only guy who wanted to rip his carefully manicured nails out of his fingers and stick them in his eyes. Thalia appeared to be the only girl who wasn't interested in him.

"Yes ladies and gentlemen , oh who am I kidding" he said in his level , soft voice. "Only ladies. The gentlemen are obviously having vivid fantasies about causing bodily harm to my person. There is a down side to being the best looking person in these forests"

"Curse you for raising the bar for the rest of us!" yelled Alex. The dryad didn't even look slightly troubled. I guess he was used to this sort of thing. Or maybe it was the demon face. It's kinda hard to read and so easy to get lost in those soft red eyes , oh crap. Here I go again.

"Yes, Adonis generally has this kind of effect on males" said the dryad. "However , fighting is not permitted. If you do we will kill you. Now ,we also have the obvious problem. You do not seem to be on the list."

"List? What List?" asked Alex.

"The list of accepted visitors" explained the dryad. "Due to some unnecessary roughness in the past we must now do background checks on people before they can be allowed entry." Unnecessary roughness? What kind of roughness would a demon consider unnecessary? "It was some half blood known as Luke. He sailed here in a ship. Awful business that. We lost several of our best tourist attractions."

Luke came here? Well , considering my luck , Luke will probably ambush us while we walk through the forests. "I don't get it" said Annabeth. "We are in the middle of America. How did he sail here?" Some fine logic there. Mighty fine logic.

The dryad pursed his lips , which afforded us a wonderful view of two nine inch long fangs. "Well , there is a river that runs through the forest. The river , if I remember correctly is actually the remains of Oranos's blood. The water does taste lovely however"

"Right" said Alex. "I'm known as Prometheus and I want in"

The dryad paled. Which is hard when your face is red. " My Lord , while I surely wish to allow you entrance ,our company policy clearly states a three week waiting period is required." Wow. He just refused a very angry titan entrance. That's slightly more impressive that the Balrog thing with Gandalf. Or maybe the demon was simply very stupid. "You see my lord , I have been trying really hard to raise my performance rating to excellent and"

Alex cut him off. Unfortunately, not literally. "Look here. You let us in there or I blow you up. Just tell your boss to go complain to me if he objects. And also tell him, he better pray to the god of his choice that he will no longer be quite so flammable." The dryad let us in.

"The forests of the dryads" said Alex ,spreading his arms wide. "Home of evil dryads , sort-of-okay centaurs and annoying harpies. We will bring Oranos back here , but first" Alex suddenly ran towards Adonis and punched him in the face. "Right. Now , lets go"

Alex calmly led us through the demon filled forests. The forests , were eary at best. Except for the path we walked on everything was entirely overgrown. The leaves had an unnatural sheen. Or maybe I was wrong. Maybe we had made nature loose that sheen. Maybe these forests were the only ones that were still natural. Natural? There was something wrong here. None of the plants had any dead leaves. And not a single leaf came across the path. Everything was perfectly controlled. Almost as if...

Unfortunately my thoughts were interrupted there. By a squirrel carrying carrying a severed human head. The head had flaming red hair and a golden earring. He also looked strangely familiar. "Uh hello Jeff" I said Nervously.

"Hello Percy" answered Jeff. "As you can see I am astride a squirrel. The reason will dazzle you. See , the forests are neutral grounds so no god may use his powers to gaze upon the forests. So they employ spies to do the watching for them. This squirrel is Zeus's spy."

"So basically you are using Zeus spy to talk to the person Zeus is spying on" I asked. Thankfully Thalia and Annabeth hadn't noticed me talking to a severed head.

"No offence but it's the only way to get ahead" said Jeff. "Just kidding. I had planned for you to rip the squirrels tongue out so that he won't talk." The squirrel ,fearing for his tounge, ran away and dropped Jeff on the path. Note: It probably was one of the squirrels of the Oracle of Delphi , who could talk. They could also see the future.

I took off my sock and used it to pick Jeff up. "So what do you want to talk about?"

"I'm here to give you a status report" said Jeff. "The Princess Andromeda is currently waiting for you at the river of time. . They have a virtually unbeatable army and Kronos is almost completely regenerated. They also don't know you are here. They think this is the only place they can be safe. You are to go in there , kill everyone of them and send Kronos back to Hades. He now had enough of a body for Hades's punishments to be ... creative. But don't worry. The dead will accompany you"

"Let me get this straight" I said. "You want me to crush a practically unbeatable army"

"Right" said Jeff.

"Deal with the dead you send along"

"Right." said Jeff.

"And destroy a titan who can kill me by merely breathing?"

"Right" said Jeff.

"All right. Me and Alex will go and do that" I said.

"You know Percy, you really haven't been very, perceptive of all this" said Jeff treating me to his sinister smile. "You haven't even began to think who the true betrayer is. You fight following others belief. But what do you believe?" Maybe Jeff had something there but I would never know. Because something shot a crossbow bold and it knocked Jeff off my shoulder. Luke. He had one sword around Annabeth's neck.

"Come on Percy , you didn't think it would be this easy did you?" asked Luke with his jaunty smile. Except it now looked evil. He was wearing the exact same clothes as Adonis.

"Oh, somebody can't think up his own style" I said.

"I hate that bastard!" yelled Luke. "He is unbearable! Whenever I see him I want to rip off his head and make him eat it!"

"Relax man. I hate him too." I said. Even though we were mortal enemies , we both hate Adonis. Which shows... something.

"Where was I?" wondered Luke aloud. "Oh right. Percy try anything and Annabeth loses her head. In the really bad way" Gah! How many "head" jokes am I going to have to take? "Now Percy" said Luke, and a weird lizard man pushed me between the shoulder blades. "Follow"

Luke's warriors weren't what you would call fun lovers. The jostled me and Thalia the whole time. They even subdued Alex but no one really tried to bother him. The Princess Andromeda stood before us in the twilight.

Luke led us unto his ship. The people still seemed to be in their weird hypnotized state. Some kids were playing in the pool while the adults sunbathed. Luke eyed them wearily. "Right everyone. It's curfew!" Everybody stood up and left. Night was falling on the ship. "So everyone is here. How wonderful." said Luke rubbing his hands together. He shot one of his "charming" smiled at Thalia. "Well Thalia, I trust Percy and Annabeth have been filling your head with all sorts of lies. While I may be a traitorous bastard I'm not the one who is kowtowing to the gods here. I'm not the one simply watching as they destroy the world. I'm the only one here who wants it to change. The one that wants to help. The west is rotten to the core. The gods are at its core. And the core is the part you throw away." Luke finished his speech.

Thalia didn't even answer. She was looking at Luke with a look beyond hatred. Alex filled the silence. "What do you want?" he asked. "You don't capture a titan and his merry band of half bloods just to admit you're a scheming bastard"

Luke smiled. "Percy is going to tell us how to free Lord _Okeanos. _You are going to use your power to finish Kronos's regeneration. You will take us to your tomb and bring him back. Thalia has the option of joining us or dying. Annabeth will be our handy hostage."

said Thalia.

Alex smiled thinly. "You're planning has one fatal flaw." said Alex. "We are on water" Ah. I doubt Luke really forgot about it , but I'm not sure if he knew that I spent 1039 smoothed out underworld hours training. The ship started to move uncontrollably as I increased the speed of the waves. The guards and Luke struggled to regain their footing and for a second me, Annabeth and Thalia were safe. That was Alex needed. With three flaming blasts the guys who were holding swords to us were flame grilled. Alex then tried something else. Unfortunately Luke seemed to suspect something like this would happen. Also he didn't seem to acknowledge just how powerful Alex was. So all hell broke loose.

I don't really know what happened to Alex and Annabeth then. All I knew was me and Thalia were thrown to the other side of the boat. Luckily an inflatable boat was there to break Thalia's fall and a hypnotized person was there to break mine. Thalia stood up shakily. "That asshole!" she yelled. Ohhhh! She looked really angry now. "I can't believe he would do that!"

"Calm down" I said irritably. "We are on a cruise ship filled with monsters. We also have a titan to kill. So your old friend has switched sides. Big deal! My own father betrayed me , remember?" I know I sounded mean but I couldn't help it. Thalia looked at me. He eyes made her look hurt and angry at the same time.

"Percy don't act like you have anything to be sad about" she said looking me straight in the eye. "Luke was my friend. My best friend. We did everything together. Your so called father hasn't spent a single day with you. He only bothered claiming you so you could be his stupid weapon." Sure I was hurt by that, but I was used to that. I was even more used to hiding it.

"Come on. We have a Titan to kill." I said ,walking towards Luke's stateroom. For some reason Thalia followed me without making a comment.

My dream seemed to be coming true. No, I don't means it's my dream to walk around a ship with Thalia, I'm talking about the dream I had a long time ago on the sea of monsters. I didn't need to ask for directions. Hades had sent his shades to help me. They guided me towards the drawing room. Sure , they were dead spirits but they were also pretty good conversationalists. "Lord Perseus" whispered one shade. "Several guards are in the next corridor. Should we go around them?"

"No problem" I said drawing Riptide. "We will go right through them." The guards were more of those freaky lizard men. Thalia took silver chains and put them on her wrists. Of course. The shield. Too bad she wouldn't have the time to use it. I caused a wave to gently rock the Princess Andromeda. The next one caused the room to shake worse than comic book guy when he is dancing. The one lizard fell and impaled the lizard guy in front of him.

"You team killing loser!" yelled the other lizard as his friend bled to death. I didn't even bother to break my stride as I drove Riptide though the other lizard guy. The other lizard made the smart choice and ran.

"Here we are" I said, opening the doors to the ballroom. This time I was treated to a grand view of the forests of the dryads. The shades around me went nuts. "_Beware, Traps. Trickery._" they whispered. Kronos''s sarcophagus glowed with an almost unnatural light. I uncapped riptide, and tried to move. But I couldn't. Some force was holding me back. It gripped my heart and stopped me completely. Like a really bad asthma attack.

"Well ,Seaweed Brain?" asked Thalia who was now standing right next to me. "Well, are we going to stop him or not?" I still couldn't move. "Fine. Leave it to me and Aegis." She tapped her wrists and the shield formed. The shield with medusa's head for an imprint. The shades fled before her shield. Thalia started to walk towards the sarcophagus.

"No!" I tried to warn her, but it was like one of those nightmares where your words get lost in your throat. Thalia pushed open.

"No! It can't be!" yelled Thalia. Kronos started laughing really loudly and evilly. Why do villains always do that? "No!" yelled Thalia again as golden light engulfed her.

I remember thinking that Thalia probably was doomed. But it didn't happen like that. What did happen was that Alex blasted a hole through the stateroom's wall and yanked Thaila out of the light. For the first time I could see what Thalia saw. And it was not pretty. Kronos had started to reform. Started. Not finished. He had both his arms and legs, sure. But he only had half his face and a large chunk was missing from his chest. He spoke in ancient Greek. "Well ,brother" he said addressing Alex. "It's been a long time"

"Not long enough" said Alex. "It was what, 30 000 years?"

"Yes" answered Kronos. "Thirty thousand years chained to a rock and having your liver eaten. Yes ,you must have been having a blast. You really should've sided with me."

"Yes. Chained to a rock as opposed to being chopped into a few hundred pieces and left to rot." said Alex. "There are things worth sacrificing for. I have lost way to much time, but at least I still have my power. The very thing you crave."

Kronos smiled as much as you could smile with only half your head left. "Tell , me _brother _if I'm so weak would I be able to do this?" Kronos raised one clawed hand and golden light shot flew gently from it. The light gently enclosed Alex. When the light disappeared Alex was laying on the floor. He wasn't moving. Luke chose that moment to come out of his hiding place. He kicked my legs out from under me and smiled coldly at Thalia.

"Now do you see what you are up against? You have no chance" he said with a new, cocky grin. Luke really should pay more attention to girls. Because he didn't seem to notice Annabeth sneaking towards Kronos's open casket. He did however place a really nice boot on my neck. Annabeth then did something I wouldn't have thought of. She threw her bronze knife at Kronos. And it was not pretty. To justify: he would now have to make due with one forth of a smile.

"You!" yelled Luke at Annabeth. "My spy informs me you think you know everything. Well, don't you know you were supposed to die?" Luke raised Backbiter to Annabeth.He also snapped his fingers and two men came and grabbed Thalia. He also took his foot off my neck. "I should have done this when you sent me that badly written valentine!" said Luke as he stepped closer.

"You jerk! It took my two hours to write that!" answered Annabeth , looking hurt.

Luke looked really angry now. "Annabeth you are dyslexic. The word sandy doesn't have a l in it- Unfortunately Luke was stopped. I put him in an incredible amount of pain. See, Riptide and Timmy were out of reaching distance so I gave him a swift tug of the gonads.

"Percy you scuzbag! I'm going to- The next tug wasn't exactly swift. It was in slow motion. Add another power to my list of superpowers: The only male who could see that and not flinch. He was somewhat in pain so I grabbed Riptide and bashed his head in with it. The two guards eyed me wearily. Fortunately they were morons. See , to fight me they let go of Thalia. Thalia then had an excellent opportunity to backstab them. She took it.

The shades led us out of the ship quickly and easily. They warned us if any guards were in the corridors and we avoided them easily. The only problem was Alex. He was knocked out, but not exactly light. We were soon outside at the river of time. Alex opened his eyes for a few seconds. "Water." he said. "Water!" I scooped up some water into my hand and then into his mouth. Alex stood up, like nothing had happened. He then took two vials and filled them up with water. "Come on. There isn't much time left." He then started leading us back into the forests. After a few minutes of ill fated conversation we arrived.

The tomb of Oranos. It was a lot like the ancient Greek architecture. I get see Annabeth looking around as if searching for tips. There were three statues around the central coffin. One of Kronos, one of Zeus and one of Oranos. Alex looked around. "This place was built a lifetime ago. It was built by the giants to try and get Oranos to help them. Unfortunately , Ares and Poseidon discovered it and stopped them from using it. However, they did not destroy the resurrection device. Alex took the two vials and poured them into a small hole. The effect was, shocking. Me, Alex, Annabeth and Thalia were all thrown back into the trees.

I stood up shakily and stared at the figure that stood in the center of the monument. Oranos was in perfect condition , but then again he had a lot more time than Kronos to regenerate. All he need was some of his life blood. And the river off time was created by his life blood. He was an impressive figure. He was wearing blue-gray robes with a staff in one hand and a sword in the other. His eyes were pitch black and he had steel gray hair. I didn't know what else to do. I bowed before the first titan. Annabeth and Thalia were still knocked out. Alex then bowed before him too. They're eyes, firey red and pitch black, met. "Hello Father" said Alex in ancient Greek. Oranos placed his sword on Alex'

s neck.

**This is my longest ever chapter. This will also be the last update for three weeks. My exams have started and I won't have time to update until they are over. Thanks for all the rewievs! **


	11. Thunderstruck

**Thunderstruck**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain**

So, to summarize, I had raised an evil Titan, defeated an evil Titan and had fallen in love with a dryad. Or maybe that last one was a bit iffy. Anyway, the afore mentioned evil Titan now had a sword placed against my friends neck. Worse still, I couldn't help but feel that I'm missing something. Some piece of this whole thing doesn't click. Somehow Kronos is once again manipulating me. Or then again, maybe he isn't . Back to my life!

Oranos looked into his son's eyes. "For a time I wondered who would be the one to bring me back. I didn't really I except you, the one who sent me here."

Alex didn't pale, or back down. He just raised his head, seemingly oblivious to the sword that was digging into his neck. Hell,( Or Tarturas) he was tough. " Technically" began Alex "I wasn't the one who sent you here. I didn't even lay a hand on you. Or a sword for that matter."

Oranos smiled, but didn't take the sword off Alex's neck. "Yes ,you didn't actually harm me. All you did was obliterate all my warriors so that they couldn't help me against Kronos's army" said Oranos.

Alex knocked the sword off his neck and stood up. "We can argue about how exactly I caused your fall later. The thing is, I brought you back." said Alex.

Oranos folded his arms across his chest and stood back. He raised himself slightly from the ground, thin trails of black light running off his body unto the forest floor. His nails turned and shot out gold light and he threw both his arms back. Spielberg would've been jealous. The entire forest seemed to truly come alive. In a few seconds the entire tomb was overgrown by wild growth. Plants overcame every thing. Annabeth looked slightly pained and Alex looked slightly amused.

"You know, these days we don't bother with those effects" said Alex dryly.

Oranos looked up. "The gods mustn't know the method of my return. I suspect I have a sizeable amount of gods against me right?" asked Oranos.

Almost bestial. "Yeah, there are plenty of them. The ones you have to worry about most are called Zeus and Kronos." It was weird that Alex didn't immediately name my dad. I was getting the idea that he felt this was a touchy subject to me.

Oranos looked thoughtful for a moment, looked at me, and then back at Alex who gave him a slight nod. "Of course. Zeus will want to sent me straight back to the hellish place Kronos sent me too." What kind of place would a Titan consider hellish? I'm thinking, a perpetual Avril Lavigne concert. With Mr. Rogers on the bass.

"Well, yeah" said Alex. "He'll probably want to organize a council meeting right?" asked Alex.

"Yes, definitely" said Oranos. "Well, gather your merry band of half bloods. Except for the blue eyed girl. She doesn't look too merry. Anyways, we have to go prepare for the meeting."

Alex nodded and put me and Annabeth on his shoulders. Oranos put Thalia on his shoulder. Both Thalia and Annabeth looked a bit too shocked to say anything. But Thalia still managed it.

"Oranos, am I right when I say if your face is seen on Olympus the gods loose they're ability to keep the other Titans in Erubus?" asked Thalia. Ohh, that might be a problem.

"Yes" said Oranos. "In fact if any Titan puts a foot on Olympos they loose a great deal of they're power. You see, Olympus is seen as the gods home. Nature itself has accepted that fact. So if a titan places his foot Olympus, nature itself becomes confused and recognizes the titans also as gods. So then the gods, in essence loose no power, but the titans regain, to a certain measure, they're powers. With they're power back they will be able, with luck to ensure a means of escape from Tarturus or Erebus, as you call it" Did he actually listen to what he was saying? Beethoven is deaf and even wouldn't be able to listen to that for more than seven seconds. Not in fact listening, but more like washing the words over his like music, but being unable to actually hear what is being said, he, that is to say Beethoven, would, 0h crap now I'm starting too.

"So this is where Hephsteus gets it from" said Alex, shaking his head. "Come on, lets go to my base.

"You have a base?" I asked. This was starting to get more like a RPG game than real life.

"Yeah" said Alex, grinning,. "I always went there after school. Oh and, the woman you thought was my mom was actually a stray dog I found in Cleveland."

Alex and Oranos continued flying eventually landing us at Alex's house. He led us past the décor, which when free from mist proved to only be sandpaper. Weird. Anyway Alex then took us into his base. Or his basement. It also seemed to be paradise. There was a lounge with a TV and a couple of game stations, the walls were decorated with black and white posters. There was even a cooler with nectar and coke next to the computer and the sounds of _My chemical romance_ filled the air. Alex, you just gotta love him.

"Right, this is the base" said Alex. "We probably won't be here long. I just have to check my e-mail" he said switching on his Pc. Annabeth looked scared and uncomfortable in the base. Thalia was looking through Alex's cd's. She still couldn't stop talking about the fact that just about every band she liked had over 3 new cd's out. Oranos was hovering behind Alex as he started to check his e-mail.

"Can you see if my e-mail has come through?" asked Oranos.

"I don't think so" said Alex. "I mean you were dead long before I invented fire, never mind when Hermes invented the internet. Who's going to send you a message?"

"You'll be surprised" said Oranos. "There you go" he said after running his hand over the keyboard. "Now lets see if what's in my inbox"

"Dear god" said Alex, and I think he was referring to Hermes. "You have over a billion messages!" Woah! It seems the god of time has never heard of spam filtering.

"I may already be a winner, advertisements for deodorant and encyclopedia and Paris Hilton's cell phone number? How did I get this crap?" asked Oranos.

"I have no idea" said Alex. "However, lets check my mail" said Alex and typed a few things. "Hmm. Well I have the location of the gods council. We are expected so it's not going to be on Olympus."

"Then where is it going to be?" asked Oranos.

Alex grinned. " At the McDonalds at maple street." he said.

Two hours, three cabs and four fashion crises later we were in the McDonalds. To say fashion crisis was an understatement. It took us forever to get Oranos to take off his robes and when he did, he did it right in front of us. Without warning. I almost went blind but I survived by covering my eyes with old pizza slices. We then went through a suit, which he blasted into oblivion. I got some basic scaring but I'm still okay. We then went for jeans and a t-shirt but he hated that two. Tracksuit? No. In the end we had to let him go in his blue gray robes and a sweater. We calmly entered the McDonalds.

Where to begin. All the god's were arranged around some tables with a couple of open spots for us. At the head of the table sat Zeus, Poseidon and Hades. Zeus had a pin striped suit with a large tomato sauce stain on it on. Poseidon was wearing white pants with a mint green shirt that said "Kiss me I'm the sea god". Not exactly discreet. Hades had chosen a simple outfit. He wore jeans with a dark blue button down shirt and his hair was dyed lime green. Just your normal family gathering. With gods. And titans.

"Oh, so we are all here now" said Zeus and swept his hands over his children and brothers.

"We've already ordered so you may place your orders now" said Hermes, who was wearing a tracksuit with a sky blue shirt. His curly black hair was hidden under a pink baseball cap.

We sat and placed our orders. "I'll have a big mac" said Thalia.

"Super sized chicken nuggets" said Alex.

"I'll have four quarter pounder meals, seven chicken fold over meals, nineteen bic mac meals and a fillet of fish. With diet cokes. I have to watch my figure" said Oranos. Yep, he was an American god alright, but then again he hadn't eaten in a couple of thousand years.

"Yes" said Zeus. "Now gentlemen, let the meeting begin. You may produce your spies" said Zeus. Zeus had his squirrel, Hades had Jeff and Poseidon had an elk. Ares and Apollo also had spies but they weren't impressive. A magpie and a pig.

"I will never understand why you use that corpse less head" said Poseidon looking at Jeff.

"Named Jeff" interjected Hades. Ah ha! Good to see someone who's on the ball.

"I don't care what his name is!" said Poseidon angrily. "He had no legs! Or arms! He can't be a spy! For the love of god, he is spineless!" yelled Poseidon. Hmmm. I'm not sure but I think my dad was referring Aphrodite there. Cause she is really hot.

"This may sound strange but the only way to get ahead is to get a head!" said Hades and started laughing.

"Very good master" said Jeff, chuckling. "But mind you don't get a big head" he added.

"I don't need to get a big head" said Hades. "You're doing just fine!"

"Oh dear god" said Poseidon, and I think he was referring to himself there. "How may head jokes to these guys have?" he asked, burying his in his hands.

"Are you okay?" asked Jeff. "Because you look like you have a head ache. "Of course, when I have a head ache, I just ache!"

"If these trivialities do not end right no I will thunder strike everyone of you" said Zeus. Ohh, he looked stressed. Obviously he didn't get all of the jokes.

"Oh come on guys" said Hades and picked Jeff up. "Look! He's smiling at you" he said to Poseidon. "But hey, I can't say if he likes you in _that_ way"

Poseidon was about to avenge himself when a Annabeth brought our order. Unfortunately she was followed by an angry looking manager. "Mister Smith" she said addressing Zeus. "You promised the elk and the squirrel would be the worst. But a severed human head. No way can that be allowed in the restaurant. The health inspector will surely close us down if he hears about this" she said. Her badge read Jude but I wasn't going to call her that.

"Oh great" Said Jeff sarcastically. "This crap again. First I can't go on carnaville rides. Or the bathroom. Then the movie theater assistant refuses to believe I'm older that eighteen. I am three hundred fricking years old. I should be allowed to watch whatever I want and"

"Sir" said the manager addressing Hades. "Please stop the ventriloquism. It really looks as if the head is talking" Ah. She obviously didn't believe in Jeff. The poor guy.

Hades however looked fired up. He was the skulking lord of the dead, evil, cynical and hard rocking. But no one messed with his guys. No one, except Hades himself. You could see that by the way he removed Jeff's head from his body. He made one clean slice with a sword. One lovingly clean slice in a room with newspapers on the floor.

"Lady" said the lord of the dead, and he looked like it. His hair reverted to black, all light seemed to flee from the room and everyone felt fear beyond anything grip there hearts. Ohhh, Oranos has some competition. "If you so much as try to remove Jeff, my family friendly head spy, I will turn your entire staff into rats and call the health inspector so that they will close you down. I will then turn your arms and legs into cheese and let the rats eat them. Afterwards I shall put you in a dance club and leave you there until the second hand smoke kills you. Do I make myself clear?" asked Hades.

You may think it's crazy, but the manager believed him and ran off. Then again, it's almost impossible to look into Hades's eyes and not believe he can do anything. Anyway, Zeus had, had enough. "This meeting shall now come to order!" he yelled, causing thunder to cover the walls. Some couples were thunderstruck, but I was okay. That was all that really mattered.

Poseidon looked up. "Finally" he said angrily. "Elk, tell them what you told me" said Poseidon, gesturing at the Elk.

The Elk stood up and bowed before Lord Zeus. "Suck up!" yelled Jeff.

"Hades, you will control your head or lose it" said Poseidon irritably.

"Hey! That was actually mildly amusing!" said Hades.

"Oh for the love of god" said Poseidon, and this time I think he was referring to Zeus. But Zeus was to busy eating to help. "Elk, just deliver the damn report" he said angrily.

"Yes my lord" said the Elk, bowing his head. When he did that, I could see through the mist and saw some weird silver horns and flashing red eyes. Freaky. I did not want to know what the "Elk" really was.

"I have, as my orders say, been watching the Princess Andromeda. The situation those not look good. All monsters swarm to the place for the chance to rip the hated half bloods to shreds. I am not sure of the cause , but some sort of enormous power hangs over the ship. It is great, perhaps too great to be stopped. It proved it's strength when Lord Prometheus tried to destroy the ship. It stopped him quickly and effectively." finished the Elk. Alex nodded. He obviously knew something was weird about that ship.

"Mr. Elk " began Zeus. "If we were to attack the ship, what is the most likely result of the attack?

"My lord, my answer is doubtful. The power they have should be sufficient to stop any attack we can launch, save if the entire big three would make one final charge together. Otherwise, it is hopeless. Of course, if the power can be used offensively, there is a large chance that any attack will fail." said the Elk.

Zeus stroked his beard, deep in thought. "What is exactly is the nature of this power, as you call it. You haven't been very specific on how it works." said Zeus.

"My Lord, the power seems to work exactly like the power of Kronos, only it's wielded by the half blood Luke. My lord it would seem, this power is actually Kronos who has somehow manifested himself in side of the half blood." Said the elk. "What's worse it seems to contain not only the power of the titan lord, but also of several other gods. It is like when he merged his powers with the other Titans to remove Lord Oranos from his throne."

"Can this power be used to destroy us?" asked Zeus, his face expressionless.

"No my lord. We have concluded that Luke can only use it on the ship, and even then, only when close to Kronos's sarcophagus . My lord, he is lacking a body, and having taken Luke's mind for his own , is capable of granting him the power of the Titan lord. However, when Kronos returns he will definitely retake his power and leave Luke to rot."

Oh, so maybe isn't as bad he seems. Maybe after harboring a slight grudge against the gods, Kronos entered his dreams and turned it into full fledged hatred. Or maybe he's just a bastard. Yep, I'm sticking with that explanation.

Zeus looked up. "My dear half bloods" he said addressing me, Thalia and Annabeth. "it seems that you would have to infiltrate the ship and destroy either Luke, or the sarcophagus. That should place a dent in his regeneration plans and also ensure Luke doesn't continue using Kronos's power. You'll actually be doing the lad a favour" said Zeus, looking at Annabeth. " In the end ,using Kronos's power would put an incredible strain on his body, killing him slowly. Now mister Elk would that be all?" asked Zeus.

"Yes my lord" said the Elk and returned to his position next to Poseidon.

"Hades what is your and Jeff's reports?" asked Zeus.

"Get them Jeff" said Hades, tiredly, dipping his chips in Ketchup. He didn't really participate in meetings. He just listened, and when he was alone, decided what he was going to do. The lord of the dead worked alone. Except for his one side kick, Jeff! Awesome!

"Well, my lords and Poseidon" said Jeff, looking around the tables at the gods and goddesses. "It would seem that the all half bloods outside of the strongholds in Disney land and half blood hill are either being wiped out or are joining Luke. So far we've lost over forty half bloods. Twenty three joined Luke, fourteen were murdered by him and three died in a situation involving an egg timer, an atomic bomb and a paint roller."

Zeus looked up, his eyes grave. "Jeff I don't want you to paint a good picture here. On the subject of half bloods , how may of the ones outside the camp half blood and Disney land are going to survive?" asked Zeus.

Jeff smiled a sad version of his cocky smile. "My lord, if things continue like this only the ones who agree to serve Luke are going to survive. However most of the half bloods have relocated to the Disney Land strongholds. It looks grim" concluded Jeff.

"Indeed it does" said Zeus. "Artemis and Hades I want you to help with the defense of Disney Land. Ensure you can be there in the blink of an eye to protect those half bloods there" said Zeus. "And now, for my own report. Nederhosen, you may begin" said Zeus and the squirrel jumped onto the table.

"Mighty Lords and ladies" began the squirrel. "I bring fair news. The forges have had a massive yield this year. We have enough weapons to blow the Titans straight back to Tartuarus should the need arise" said the squirrel joyfully. There was some clapping at this, and Ares and Apollo exchanged knowing glances. Zeus was to busy spying on me to get Nederhosen to gather any real information.

"Now Ares and Apollo, do you have anything to report on the Cyclopes and the lizard warriors?" asked Zeus.

"No, my Lord they are both being unusually still. " said Ares. Obviously a lie. There were more lizards people on Luke's ship then I had leg hairs.And my legs were really hairy.

"Right then, let us proceed to the less pleasant part of this experience. And I don't mean the bill. I mean Oranos over there" said Zeus.

Oranos smiled stiffly. "I'm sorry gentlemen but I'm only here to kill Kronos. After that, I don't really know what I would do. Maybe haunt some people, start a fast food restaurant chain, whatever. I only want to be able to do to my son as he did to me" finished Oranos.

There was a weird kind of silence in the room. Every knew it made sense, but no one was really sure weather or not they could trust him. Hades spoke up. "I may not know about love" he said leaning into a more comfortable position, "but I know about hating. And this guy really hates his son. We don't have to worry about him betraying us until Kronos is dead" finished Hades.

You could see Hades left Oranos a hint in his word choices. Until Kronos is "Dead". Meaning the second he Kronos is dead, Zeus will turn on him. And Oranos will probably be ready, and that will start another war. I had no idea how, but I knew Hades didn't have time for that kind of crap. He would plot and ensure that Oranos fails in his plans. That was a warning in more than one way.

"Right" said Zeus standing up. "Well, Thalia and Percy,you have your orders." Said Lord Zeus and made to leave.

"Oh no, you bastard!" yelled Hades."You're paying this time!'

**Okay this was an early update. See, I was stuck in a car for twelve hours and had time to right down this chapter. I also only have a week of exams left so the updates will return to weekly next week, Wednesday. -Thanks to Dartboy and Becky for rewieving! Also thaks to Durza II. I'm glad you like the story so much.**


	12. Rock out to Old School

**Rock out to Old School**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain**

I'm getting sick of this. The betrayal, constant fighting and the cheese burgers. I think I'm becoming bored with them. I was reunited with my father, the all-powerful Poseidon. And he acted like I didn't even exist. He looked worried, and it looked liked it hurt him not to meet my eyes. These plots were running deeper. It seemed to be Kronos's doing, the deception upon deception. But this was different. Zeus was acting recklessly, but still ceaselessly. Hades had readied himself and made the alliances he thought was necessary. His and Zeus's armies were ready. My father was the real mystery. His move was yet to be made. The unpredictable sea god. Every god was ready. And in the end there wasn't a god left to trust. Back to my life!

Zeus turned and deftly went to pay Jude. Alex stood up along with Oranos. Mr. D also came closer. He looked a lot better than he usually did. He could make himself look incredible, but he chose not to. Or maybe he just wanted his form to match his personality. I never asked him. Maybe he was just one of those look like no one is watching types.

"Well guys, while you guys risk your lives trying to take down Luke, me and Oranos have to go and spend some time with Hades" said Alex. "Fill Oranos in on every thing that happened in the last one hundred thousand years."

"That may take some time" I said.

"It may" said Alex, eyes flashing dangerously. "But it's our sworn duty as the lords of fire of time and fire respectively, as the warrior who are , even now striving to save humanity. As titans. And besides, you're going back to camp so we have time to kill."

"And where better to kill it than the land of the dead" said Oranos. "But seriously. The time difference between the dead and the living was created by me. I can control it exactly like I please. That's why I always got time" Okay it's official. The next person to make a joke like that will be skewered upon their own spine. Ha! Ha! Who's the king of violent imagery?

Mr.D stepped over to us. "Hello kids" said Mr. D, looking kind and pleasant. "You may note I seem kind and pleasant." Spooky! That was right on! "Well, you are wrong. I'm my usual bitter misery loving self. Isn't that a hoot?" asked Mr.D

"Not really" said Annabeth. Weird. She probably wasn't into the vibe of enjoying other's misery.

"You may be right!" said Mr. D "But there's a small problem with your theory. You are wrong. Anyways, I'm here to take you back to Camp Half Blood for mission prep."

"I would say we are leaving you in good hands but we aren't." said Alex. "Look" he said, pointing at Mr.D's hands. "Probably never even heard of moisturizers"

"Complaints of the state of my hands notwithstanding, they're coming with me" said Mr. D "Come on kids. To my SUV."

"No way" said Thalia, crossing her hands across her chest. "No way am I driving in that Ozone destroying machine." Thalia was an environmentalist? I must say, I did not see that coming. Actually I can't actually say, because these are my sarcastic inner driven thoughts and, Ah. You probably know what I mean.

Mr. D sighed and Alex cringed while Oranos looked merely curious.

"I'm sorry but global warming doesn't really exist" said Alex. "You see, after one of D's parties Helios, the sun god got drunk. Unfortunately he went a little crazy with the whole, giving light to the planet thing. He burned right through the ozone layer and would've destroyed the entire earth if not for Apollo. He sobered Helios up. Used something called milk. No idea what that is . Unluckily for us Helios wasn't entirely focused afterwards and wound up blowing up the Hindenburg."

"So basically global warming is a lie?" asked Thalia, looking dumbstruck. One of these days I'm going to have to get Alex to tell me history from the god's point of view. It should be funny.

"Yeah" said Alex. "We screwed up pretty badly. But one day we'll make things right. Well, gotta go" said Alex and he and Oranos left. I'm pretty sure Alex was telling the truth. He would try to make things right.

Mr. D SUV wasn't really comfortable. We were all forced to sit in the back seat and Annabeth was squashing me into the car door. Leave it to the god of wine to actually reengineer his car just so that we would be extremely uncomfortable.

Annabeth looked at me. "Percy, I have a question" she said. "If you like a girl, how would you let her know?"

Ohhhh, this called for a smoothness beyond gravy. I crossed my legs and put my hands on my knees. Which felt weird in the jeans I was wearing. Now gents, listen closely. Or read closely. Or whatever. "Annabeth, prepared to be shocked by the sheer smoothness in my actions." I began. "Yawn" I said and put my arm around Annabeth. Note: I didn't actually yawn. I just said Yawn. As an actual word.

"Right" said Annabeth blushing slightly but still grinning.

"When you two are done flirting can you please stop breathing? All this air is bad for my complexion" said Mr. D.

"Oh shut up D" said Thalia irritably. I didn't actually attempt to remove my arm, but I did lower my level of smoothness. Annabeth didn't really seem to mind. Damn. I thought the smoothness was a nice touch. "Your name is too Hip Hop for me D" said Thalia. "Speaking of which can you put some music on?" asked Thalia hopefully.

"Sure" said Mr. D and smiled. Oh No. Someone is about to become extremely miserable then. "Here's some old school for you" said Dionysus and placed a cd in his Cd player. Oh No. Me and Annabeth might survive but Thalia was doomed. The dreaded music of-

"No!" yelled Thalia. "Not Duran Duran!"

"You know, being nice is really hard work" said Mr. D conversationally. "I went to Hades and asked what music you liked. He said Heavy Metal. But unfortunately I didn't have time to go browsing. So I just grabbed the album he said he would play if you ever came to the fields of the punishments."

"Percy" said Thalia weakly. "I don't think I'm going to make it . You can have my Cd's. And Annabeth can have my.."

"Okay , if it'll stop your whining I will change the band" said Mr. D. Thalia sat up, looking beter. Color returned to the world. Somewhere, somewhere close, Smells like teen spirit was playing. The world was at peace. "You'll enjoy this! The Bee Gee's!" said Mr. D. Thalia fell back. The world returned to darkness. Somewhere, somewhere close,

the Bee Gee's were playing. Oh Crap. It was coming from the speakers! No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We arrived at camp, hollowed and defeated. Mr .D came and addressed us joyfully. "Kids, Kids. I feel like were family now. You're annoying and I hate you but I can't kill you. Just like the family. Now you had well planned , well written objectives, but I lost them. So I'm afraid all I can offer you is this Duran Duran cd."

"Please tell me you are kidding" said Annabeth. I like that girl. So much faith.

"Of course I'm kidding" said Mr. D . "I also have this nifty Bee Gee's cd for you"

"Can you at least tell us what exactly we are supposed to do?" I asked. Of course, you may be asking why I'm trying to get information that good lead to my death. Of course what I can do, is tell them I defeated the titans, hope nothing happens for three years and then backstab the gods. Subtle, yet refined.

Mr. D smiled. "All right, here's your objectives. You have to infiltrate the Princess Andromeda , avoid the hordes of monsters, hypnotized mortals, traitorous half bloods and the mortal with the power that is three times greater than Zeus's. Then all you have to do is destroy the sarcophagus's main red jewel. Or just trash the whole thing. But make sure that jewel is smashed. And make sure none of it comes on you." he said.

"Why can't any of the jewel pieces come on me?" I asked. I wasn't really worried about the afore mentioned hordes of monsters. If I was right, there would be nothing to avoid.

"Because mortal" said Mr. D. "That jewel is actually an diamond in which Luke and Kronos's blood are mixed. It is the way Kronos is giving his power to Luke. But more importantly, while Kronos was laying in Tartarus he could've gotten any sort of disease. If the blood touches you, you could get Aids or something. On second thought, make sure the blood touches you" said Mr. D.

"Right" said Thalia irritably. "When to we go?" she asked. Ah. Someone wants some vengeance. I don't know why, but I have a sudden craving for popcorn. Weird.

"Now" said Mr. D "Here's what you need. The blueprints to the Princess Andromeda, a long sword for Annabeth, seeing as she carelessly lost her knife and a chair, in case you get tired and need to sit down."

"Please" I said. "In the name of all gods, titans and monsters even the one I don't like, tell me your joking." I know the guy was disturbed but this is ridiculous.

"You are right." said Mr. D. "Were the hell are we going to get the blueprints of the ship? Yeesh!" You think things can't get worse, but they can.

That was officially the second worse mission prep in my life. The last one which was before my so called "greatest" quest was far worse. But that's life. One minute you are a hero, the next you are some lame side kick called Ron. Yup, it sucks. Anyways, we calmly walked through the dunes towards the lake. I started walking into the water, which was kinda difficult.

"Percy ,take the damn chair of your back" said Thalia. Fine. But it did seem like a practical idea at the time.

"Percy I have a question" said Annabeth. "If your father can't help you, who are you going to be praying to?"

That made sense. Fortunately my dad wasn't the only one with sea power. "Lord Hades, hear my call. " I began. There was blind faith, and there was hoping. I had no idea what Hades would send, or if he would even send anything.

Annabeth's eyes were wide. "Percy you know that only the dead obey Hades, right?" she asked. Damn logic.

"One day I would find the god of logic, I would find out what he has against me, and then I would choke him with his overly long hair." I said.

" Logically that plan would require the god to have long hair." said Annabeth. Okay, that god is doomed. I don't care if he can't die, I'll kill him until he does die from it. Unluckily for me, we were interrupted. A long, old and very dead looking raft popped out of the water.

"Hello" said a dead skeleton who was standing on the raft. "May I say sir and madam look lovely?" he asked.

Oh crap. As I later found out, Charon had decided to branch out. He started a multi level business which involved transporting mortals and gods around. If you were stuck in the recording room without American Express you could work it off in his business.

"Right" I said. "Me and the madam, as well as Thalia need to get to the Princess Andromeda. What do you charge for that kind of thing?" I asked.

"Two drachmas" said the skeleton without a pause.

Right. Next time I was praying to a god which sent free transportation. "I'm afraid all I have is this chair" I said, beckoning the nice chair.

"I said Drachmas not a chair" said the skeleton angrily. This was going to require stealth. The guy had a pouch of Drachmas on his belt. So I did what any sensible person would do. I punched his head of his body and quickly removed two drachmas from the pouch.

"Why does everyone keep doing that?" yelled the skeleton.

"You have a very punchable face" I said handing him the two drachmas.

"Right" said the skeleton. "Now kids, close your eyes and kiss yourselves goodbye. I was a taxi driver in my life and this raft has no limits." Why couldn't the god of logic help me now?

We sped along the ocean reaching speeds of up to seven hundred knots per hour. Ah. I have more knowledge on the sea than anyone else. Too bad I don't know what the hell a knot is. We slowed down. Thalia and Annabeth looked seasick. Well, it was about to get a lot worse. The Princess Andromeda was standing before us. Believe me when I say you never want to attract the wrath of the sea god when you are on a boat. Cause he can do so much more than I'm about to do. I lifted my hand calmly and twisted. I could almost feel the waves moving through me, ready to obey my, oh so stylish will.

"You should have accepted the chair" I said coldly and used the waves the hurl the raft on top of the ship. Thalia looked down at her hands. The chains started to expand, and she drew her own rather thin blade. Annabeth lifted her own sword. I guess her mom sent her the sword. It looked like it was designed just for her.

"You know I'm going to have to charge you extra for this" said the skeleton angrily. Foolish exmortal! Not even the dead are safe from Timmy! Oh. I suddenly realized how lame that sounded. I'm going to have to re name that sword.

I drew Riptide and Timmy. "I'm sorry skeleton guy but you have to die. Again." I said and slashed him with Timmy. Yup. That sounds really bad.

"So Sea Weed brain how are you going to get these guys to look the other way?" asked Annabeth.

"I'm going to get creative" I said. I stood at the front of the ship, ripping off _Titanic._ It's times like these I really glad I don't get sea sick. The sea started churning beneath the ship, causing it to slow down. I literally reversed the current. Soon they would be forced to turn and. Hmm. That was quick. See, If the current reverses unto itself it would form a "freak wave" If they are turning I can smash the entire side of the ship in. By the way, those sea documentaries are wrong. Freak waves are not formed by the rapid absorption of energy through waves fusing them together and forming a new super wave. No. Super waves are formed by either me or my dad being pissed. In the sense of being drunk or very angry.

"Percy, what the hell are you doing?" yelled Thalia. Surprisingly not many people are used to or enjoy watching a thirty foot tall wall of water bash into a ship. Especially if they're on the ship. By the time I was down, I got shouted at four times and slapped twice.

"If you are so smart who are we going to get off the ship before it sinks?" demanded Annabeth. Hmm. She sounded angry. Must be the sea sickness.

"I created a whirlpool. See, this way the water enters the ship, gets sucked out and then reabsorbed back into the current. The current then goes into the whirlpool and repeats the process" I explained.

"Do you have any idea what you've just said?" asked Annabeth.

"No, but that didn't stop me from saying it" I said.

"Whatever guys" said Thalia. "In case you haven't noticed we're on a quest here". Hey! We were having a moment there. Bad Thalia! No XP points for you!

"Right!" I said. "To Luke's chamber of evil!" We ran towards Luke's room. For some reason no one stopped us. Maybe we thought we would get away. Maybe we thought they were all looking the other way. Either way, we did not notice him following us.

We ran into Luke's stateroom, ready to destroy a defenseless sarcophagus. The sarcophagus still glowed but it now longer shined. Almost as if it's power was. First logic. Now more lightning fast connections. It's obvious that the day before tomorrow isn't my day. "Hello Luke" I said turning around slowly.

Luke has looked better. Letting a titans power flow through your body is obviously not good for your complexion. "Luke are you wearing make up?" I asked. To sum up Luke's appearance at this time. His sandy hair had turned a weird tobacco ash color. His face had a couple of more scars. There was also long, deep and black grooves in his arms. Like cuts that had been half healed and then re opened. But the worst was this. Using Kronos's power had killed something deep inside of Luke. His fashion sense. He was wearing black jeans with an unbuttoned plaid shirt over a white vest. Thalia summed it up.

"What happened to you Luke?" asked Thalia. "You look like you escaped from 1995 Dawson's Creek."

Luke smiled evilly. "Thalai, you have no idea what happened. I now control enough power to remove the gods from their throne. When I've been granted immortality I will be able to alter my appearance at will" Luke calmly walked around the room. He had no guards. Nor do I think he needed any.

"Can't you see this is killing you?" asked Annabeth. Her voice cracked slightly. "He is just using you!"

Luke's answering smile was even wider. "You really have no idea?" He said looking at us as if waiting for us to say Ha! We do know! "Oh. I thought that even Percy would've figured it out by now! But no. Kronos was right. Percy you are really disappointing me here. But enough of this unpleasantness. We must, talk" said Luke and snapped his fingers. Servants came in with several plates of food. "Don't worry Percy. I fixed the boat. You have nothing to worry about." Except Luke's ability to cook. Could be dangerous.

"Do really think we're dumb enough to eat that?" asked Thalia. She had a point there. That he would poison us is unlikely. If he wanted to he could rip us apart by simply snapping his fingers. Besides, it wasn't Luke's style. What we were worried about was that he would throw some sort of mind controlling potion or other drugs. Maybe even MSG.

Luke blew some grey hair out of his eyes. "You will eat or you will die. I'm not planning on forcing you to join me. When you do, it will be willingly. I'm not here to kill or negotiate. I'm only here to explain the facts to you. Maybe you don't really know. So far only Hades and Alex know for sure. And no other god will believe them."

Annabeth sat on a chair and picked up a piece of garlic bread. "And what is it don't we know?" she asked. Me and Thalia were still standing. Eating Luke's cooking would be inhuman. And while I'm a half blood, I can still die.

Luke smiled for a moment, as if in thought. Or maybe he was receiving orders from Kronos. "The sea god's corruption runs far deeper than you will ever know. He sure waited long enough. It's all in good time. Unfortunately, you will have to suffice with this. Percy, tell me where we are." said Luke.

"Somewhere in the ocean" I said. "Heading towards New York." The first guess was spot on .With the whole, we are on the ocean thing. The second one required my powers.

"Percy you must feel free to eat" said Luke and tapped insistently on the table. "Things can get worse for you if you don't"

I can't sit down" I said. "I lost my chair."

"I tire of your game" said Luke. "See, I have something called ultimate power. And I will now use it." He raised his hand. I was lifted off the ground, choking slightly.. Wait! Why does this seem familiar? Oh shit, he was using the force! Oh, wait. He had Kronos's power. Right. For a second there I was worried. Now all that was left was to succumb to the mind numbing pain. Ow!

"Killing you Percy, will be such a waste. However, if you don't eat I will torture you for the next two years." He flicked his hand. A cupboard full of torture devices opened. Maces, cleavers, pikes, small natives of an island nation, pepper, nothing too shocking was inside the cupboard.

I fell on my feet and took a seat next to Annabeth. She looked really shocked. Thalia still stood by impassively.

"I'm doing my best to be a gracious host here. Thalia, you may take a seat." said Luke. Thalia sat down but she didn't eat anything. Which wasn't a good move. Evil Luke may have been but he was also an awesome cook. Or maybe he just ordered the food from the kitchen.

"Thalia, I'm still trying to understand you here. When we were on the run together you hated your Father. You wanted to kill him. A foolish notion but something you wanted to do. Why are you siding with him now?" asked Luke. Another proof of Kronos's possession of Luke. The overly long words he used.

"Think of it logically" said Thalia. No! For the love all things, No! "You plan to destroy civilization. If civilization is destroyed, what the hell am I going to do for fun? There will be no rock music, no computers, movies, malls or people with actual intelligence. What the hell am I going to do? " she asked.

Luke looked shocked for a moment. "Thalia, you will be an actual goddess. You will have everything you can possibly want. You can recreate the entire art of music and remove the genre's you dislike! You can rebuild everything like you want it to be!" said Luke.

Thalia crossed her arms. "Luke ,the titans don't share power. Not really. As soon as Kronos is back he will kill you and throw you in the fields of punishments. Food and entertainment is all we ever were to them!" said Thalai angrily. She may have been angry at the gods but she hated the titans more.

"Right. I was wondering why Kronos thought Percy would be better for this. Now I see he was right. We are heading towards New York. Percy, can you guess why we are going there?" asked Luke.

"You are going to walk upon Olympus, granting the titans the power they need to free themselves" said Annabeth. Hey! Her name isn't Percy. Well neither is mine, but that isn't the point!

"Correct. As Lord Kronos's essence is within me, the god's power will be broken. In the age to come only the ruthless will survive. All others will fall back into the ashes of the monstrosity we cal Western Civilization." Said Luke.

"Question" I said. "What will happen to eastern civilization after western civilization is destoyed?" I asked. I had always wondered about that.

"Shit!" yelled Luke. "We forgot that there is an Eastern civilization! What are we going to do now?"

"You actually forgot about half the planet in your evil plan to take over the world?" asked Annabeth.

"Our planning never really went past...then it will have to be retained. Suddenly it all makes sense" said Luke, probably deep in thought. "Of course, of course, that's why he didn't want us to attack from there" said Luke. Luke looked up. "It appears you found a hole in our plan. No matter. It makes no real difference."

"Lord Luke" came a voice from the intercom. "We are approaching the coast of New York."

"Uh, Luke I know you have immortal powers and everything, but they won't be of any use to you at the gates. Your powers won't work there." I said. Note: It was an after effect of the battle of the giants. Kronos, being the titan of fertilization needed to be in contact with the earth to gain full power. All titans worked this way. But, more importantly, the gates were designed so that, unless you were recognized as a inhabitant of the mountain., you lost your godliness at the gate. And of course, the gate's guardian was none other than Hercules. Who is really tough. The strongest half blood ever. And he is now immortal, though not a god.

Luke smiled and snapped his fingers. Ropes of lightning appeared around Thalia and Annabeth. "Percy, I'm not going to take on Hercules. You are."

"Uh, no offence but he is fully grown and the deadliest half blood who ever lives. We aren't close to the sea so he'll rip me apart" I said.

"That's the plan Percy" said Luke. "That's the plan."

**Note: I did not lie. I said updating would return to normal Wednesday. I did not say I was going to update Wednesday. Thanks for all the rewievs. **


	13. Hand me the fritos, Fat Boy!

**Hand me the Fritos, Fat Boy!**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain**

Fighting Hercules wasn't something I wanted to do. Generally, anything that involves me cashing in my life insurance policy is a sign of a bad day. Almost as bad as the day I had to get a life insurance policy. Now to summarize: Luke had us hostage, and would kill Annabeth and Thalia if I didn't take down Hercules. And if I try to take down Hercules, I will die. Back to my life! Or what's left of it anyway.

"Uh, Luke, you do realize that makes no sense, right?" asked Annabeth. "If he dies trying to defeat Hercules, how are you going to get in?" Her concern for me is so touching. I could go bowling with my mom. Ha! Ha! Take that logic!

Luke smiled even more cynically. "I do realize that. But you see, none of my own warriors are brave enough to take on Hercules. And I can't do it in my, present, um... state, if you will. So we figured Percy might as well try" said Luke. See! Whenever things make sense it ends badly for me.

"Oh yeah? Then why doesn't Percy's dad mind that you are removing his weapon?" asked Thalia. You know, it's time like these you feel others concern. I'm about to get ripped apart. _Now_ would be an _excellent_ time to discuss the logics behind my doom.

"Percy is an unreliable weapon. We have decided that you are to take his place" answered Luke.

"Right, but I'd rather not fight for you. I kind of have an appointment with a, a dentist. A dental appointment. That's it. My one tooth feels a bit iffy." I said.

"Nice try Percy but you did not think your cunning lie all the way through. See, in case you don't remember I have the power of Apollo. I can heal you." said Luke and pointed at my mouth. My tooth felt instantly better. Curse Luke and his amazing dental abilities!

Thalia and Annabeth looked at me worriedly. "We've hit land!" came a voice over the speakers. "So we'll need four hours to repair the ship!"

"Well, my dear friends" said Luke. "It seems that it is time for us to leave the ship. And remember, if you try anything I'll not only blow you up, but carefully. Then I'll kill you, softly. See, these days screams of pain annoy me." We are officially screwed.

We left the ship reasonably safely. Few people stared at us, despite the fact that we were dripping wet, and Luke's dastardly appearance. The mist seemed to be affecting him. Must've been the titan inside of him. He now looked reasonably well. His hair returned to it's former glory. Sure I can fight the guy and probably win, but how will I fight his incredible hair? Luke then hailed a cab.

Luke looked at the cab driver and waved his hand saying "You will take us to the empire state building for free" The cabby nodded and let us in. Gah! He used the Jedi Mind Trick! And now he can, wait. He has the powers of an immortal titan, not the force. Nothing to be afraid of. Right. Right.

"Percy, you may attempt to ready yourself for this." said Luke. "Of course, you may also quiver in fear, marveling at the brilliance of this. If you kill Hercules, an impossible feat by the way, I get into Mt. Olympus and gather a massive titan army. If Hercules kills you, highly likely and amusing, my biggest threat is removed." said Luke, flashing me a dazzling smile.

I didn't really have a comeback for that. Fortunately, my glowing reputation wasn't ruined. Because Luke continued talking.

"It's funny isn't it?" asked Luke. "We half bloods, can in no way kill a god. Yet, we are the ones who either keep them in power or remove them from it. In this war the side with the most half bloods win. See the gods don't trust each other, and they imposed laws to avoid direct fights with each other. Powerful laws. Laws , when broken, will revert the world back to chaos and doom. Unless all three leaders of the world, Zeus, Hades and Poseidon declare war on each other there can be no victory. Otherwise it is over. See if Poseidon declares war on Zeus and vice versa, one will claim the others realm. But they won't have the underworld, nor would they be able to enter it. The combined power of the Big three is considered unreal by some. At the moment, they've redefined the laws of the world itself. If the titans return they won't be able to defeat the gods unless all three of the trio gods ruling the universe declare war on each other." said Luke. "So that's the half bloods are so important. They can move everywhere, unlike the gods. We are the gods' most favored weapon. And that's why Hades tries to kill as many heroes' as he can. Without us, the gods would be powerless to overthrow him." Okay, what were the gods smoking when they thought up this plan, and where can I get some?

"Your stop" said the cab driver wearily. Man, the gods taking over your brain must be tiring. Or maybe he's on his third nine hour shift. Yeah, that's it.

"Come Percy, time to face the music. Or in your case, certain death. I would offer you a scone before you go but I don't have any with me." said Luke. The chivalry was nice, but unexpected.

We walked up to the receptionist. This time he was reading something entitled "Eldest".

"600tth floor please" said Luke with his dashing smile. Hmm. That's a new one. We're up to seven smiles! Who high can we go?

"We stopped letting nutcases in two years ago" said the guard without looking up.

"I want to see Lord Zeus" said Luke with a casual smiled. Eight! Will he do nine?

The man looked into Luke's eyes and then back down. "Sorry kid no one sees the Lord Zeus without an appointment. And in your case, proper clothing."

Your normal villain my have blown up the lobby to prove he wasn't to be messed with. Not Luke. He first had to piss the guy off and then blow up the lobby. He slapped the book out of the guards hand and when he looked up, pointed his hand backwards. Luke flashed the guard a cocky smile. Damn! I hate doubles! A crack appeared directly underneath Luke's hand. It spread, swallowing everything. Cars, taxi, phone booths, people, ants, very small rocks, hot dogs, unreasonably priced telephone guides and even a car.

"You must be Luke" said the guard evenly. "Take this" he said handing him the security card. "Normally I would say make sure no one else is in the elevator with you but now I am pretty sure that is not necessary."

"Come on Percy" said Luke, pushing us roughly into the elevator. "Say your goodbyes to your friends, so that they can watch you die in peace. So don't scream loudly. You'll kill the vibe faster than Hercules can kill you."

Thalia punched me roughly on the shoulder. "Make sure you bleed and drip guts all over him" she said. "That way, at least you will leave a mark on his clothing."

"Your concern is touching" I said. It actually was. Most people would look worried but she didn't. She was trying to keep my spirits up. Or maybe she didn't care weather I live or die.

Annabeth was still standing in the corner of the elevator. The shock that I was about to have my guts ripped out must have finally caught up with her. I hugged her tightly. "Don't worry, I'll be fine" I said. "I always am." She looked like she wanted to say something but couldn't get it out. "Yes?" I inquired brilliantly.

"Percy I" she began.

"Ding" said Luke, and delivered a smarmy smile. Hell Yeah! He did nine! "We are at the top. Percy, it's time for you to do what you were forced to come here, to do." He, Thalia and Annabeth stood at the farthest point of the bridge. "HERCULES!" yelled Luke at his hardest. "Time to defend Olympus!" he yelled.

I didn't have any armor. All I had was Riptide and Timothy. No, that does not sound better. There was a small villa at the side of the gate. A villa I never noticed. A distant rumbling came from the villa as Hercules came out of it. Packets of Lays, Doritos and Fritos fell out before him. Oh, if I kill Hercules, the first thing I'm going to do is to eat those Fritos. I want those Fritos! They're mine! Mine! Oh. I was drifting again.

Hercules stepped out of the villa. You've probably seen some pictures of Hercules, or maybe even a short educational film. He looked like the fittest, most muscled guy you have ever seen. However, three TV shows, seven game stations and a diet consisting only of chips and Nectar later, Hercules had gained over five hundred pounds. He had more lard than your average bakery. I'm talking ridiculously fat. Not slightly overweight. His entire body probably weighed more than your average continent. Excluding Australia. In short, the legendry Hercules is now fatter than that fat bastard guy in Austin Powers. I would say it would be easy to kick his ass now, but his ass is so big I would either lose my foot or break it.

"Who called me?" asked Hercules lazily, eating Doritos non stop.

"My warriors were afraid of this?" demanded Luke. "What were they afraid of, him bleeding gravy all over them?" He had a point. It probably took Hercules an hour to watch his favorite half hour TV show.

Hercules ,however smirked unpleasantly. "You sent this whelp to challenge me?" asked Hercules. "You have better change to win a best dressed award than he has to beat me."

Luke seemed overly fazed. Granted this was unexpected but his hair was actually changing color. Ha! Ha! His hair appeared invincible, but in times of crisis it flees, leaving an icky rip off of its former glory. Wait. I'm about to be killed and I'm still thinking about Luke's hair? The way it falls so casually into his eyes and. Oh Crap. I think I'm going nuts.

"Seriously" yelled Luke. "How, in the name of myself, as temporary titan, are you going to defend Olympus?" He had an excellent question. But I heard it so it's not his anymore! Okay. I'll stop the bad puns.

Hercules smiled. "Like this" he said and slammed his fist to the ground. Shockwaves rippled across the bridge, flinging me, Luke, Annabeth and Thalia into the elevator door. You could actually hear the chips shatter inside their packets. Luke stood up shakily.

"Well, go on Percy. Take him down" said Luke. Oh great. Well, I would say, or think I've had worse, but that would be a lie. The least I could do is ran around him and hope he gets a stroke and die. It's on!

I had Timmy in my left hand, Riptide in my right. I ran at Hercules at full speed and before he could cause a minor earthquake used my sword to launch my self into the air and unto his back. He swung his arm back and almost knocked himself out. I knew this was crazy but the guy was too slow to do anything about me. Scent wise, this guy made a Cyclopes smell good. I stood on his shoulders occasionally dodging left or right whenever he swung his arms around. You may ask why he wasn't running to throw me off. Well, he tried that for ten seconds. That gave me my brake. I pointed Riptide downwards, ready to stab him through the neck when Hercules jumped. And I mean jumped. I was thrown off and landed right next to Luke. I think I broke myself there.

"Die, son of Poseidon!' said Hercules and raised his club.

"Percy!" yelled Annabeth.

"Woah!" yelled Alex. "It would seem we have arrived in the nick of time. No thanks to Oranos." Guess the tour was over then.

"Hey!" protested Oranos. "Do you have any idea how long I waited in line to buy that cam corder?" What? He wanted to tape my inevitable and dramatic demise? Ha. Demise is a funny word.

Hercules looked stunned. Luke looked numb struck. Actually, their expressions were similar but I'm using different words to describe it.

"What are you doing here?" demanded Luke. "Your powers won't work, so you are no match for me!" He had us there. Some of you may note that Luke's powers shouldn't be working either. He still has the power of Apollo, the only god who's power still works at the gate. Something about Apollo providing Hercules' health care. Why can't he simply kill Hercules? Because Hercules' is safe from Apollo's powers. Some kind of sun block and deodorant deal he has with Zeus himself. Isn't that special?

"Our powers don't work" agreed Alex. "But we have these!" He and Oranos then raised twin sledge hammers. Okay. Take on a god with sledgehammers. No wonder these guys have survived all theses years. Wait. That's wrong.

"What are you going to do with those?" asked Hercules irritably. He was probably angry at Alex and Oranos for killing the killer vibe.

"Interesting question" said Oranos. "But first can you hold this and point it at us and Luke?" He then proceeded to throw the cam corder at Hercules, how dutifully pointed it at them.

"You draw your power from Kronos right?" asked Alex, running backwards towards the place where I think they came from.

"And?" asked Luke angrily. "Is this your defense? Annoying questions?" Fool! We haven't even started asking annoying questions.

"And Kronos' body is within this sarcophagus right?" asked Alex, producing the sarcophagus and readying his sledge hammer.

"No you won't!" yelled Luke and gathered sunlight around his hand. Unfortunately for him Oranos took his first swing at the sarcophagus, denting it deeply. Luke fell to the ground in pain.

"The best part about this seems to be we are removing Kronos from the picture. But you are wrong!" said Alex. "The best part is that we have it all on tape! Thanks Hercules!"

"No problem" said Hercules. We hero's stand together when we are not trying to kill each other! That's the way it is, and the way it shall remain.

Luke was grasping in pain. Alex and Oranos showed no signs of mercy. Of course, Luke was trying to bring back the guy who chopped them into convenient (for the fishes anyway) bits and got the other guy strapped to a rock for twenty thousand years.

Alex went over to Luke who was shaking in pain. He drew his long, black blade. Of course it was fireless, but still pretty scary. Alex too. He didn't act like a god, but when he was angry he turned scarier than Hades. Long black scars formed on his arms, his hair turned into fire. Anyway he lifted Luke off the ground with real ease. Easily.

"You didn't stand a chance" said Alex. "Not really. Your are probably the strongest son of Hermes to ever live. You know more about this war than almost every single god. And yet you still lie to yourself. Kronos doesn't reward loyalty. He didn't reward mine, he will not reward yours. Everything he offers is a lie. Even if I haven't decided to kill you now, he would've killed you eventually. You were doomed either way." said Alex and raised his sword, ready to slice of his neck.

"Close the fucking lens" said Oranos irritably to Hercules, who was zooming in on Luke's soon to be deceased body.

And that was the moment the war officially started. Everything was ready, but this was the moment that defied everything. That was the moment when I should've realized how screwed we were. See Alex raised his sword, and a lightning bolt hit him in the chest.

Alex was thrown back, almost as if in slow motion and fell to the ground. Oranos looked to the sky in horror. He then grabbed me, Thalia and Anabeth and threw us in the elevator.

"Ran back to camp half blood!" he yelled, as Luke groggily stood up. "Tell Hades it's time!" I had no idea what he meant. The last I saw, Alex was lying unmovingly on the ground, and Oranos had his staff and sword out. Luke stood up, smiling and surrounded by several guards. And for now, Oranos was as weak as they were.

**Sorry for the delay in updating. I've been really busy, cleaning the swimming pool, replanting the lawn, reading to the deaf etc... However summer vacation is starting! Where I am anyway. I will have more time to write and the updates should come faster. Thanks to Becky and Blooming Author7 for rewieving.**


	14. Shenanigans of the increasingly oblivios

**Shenanigans of the increasingly oblivious**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain**

The war has started. This was not a war where the strongest or the one with the most warriors wins. This is a war where betrayal plays a massive role and the victor is the one who is backing the right side. At first I thought there were two sides. Kronos versus Zeus. But I was wrong. Very wrong. As wrong as I could have been without assuming the gods were actually an evil shadow government controlled by some guy named Allen in a basement in Florida. Back to my life!

"Guess it's time for some mortal combat" said Oranos and checked his sword's balance. Despite the weird ordeal the elevator wasn't moving. Alex's hand was trapped between the doors. But Immortals can't use the elevator. Something about "irritating" any invading gods, titans or Hulk Hogan.

Luke's warriors charged Oranos. He swung his sword in a low arch, brought it up swiftly and thrusted hard, but ever so gently. The guy who was impaled probably didn't think so however. Three more guys fell before the Lord of all titans and gods.

"Dear me" said Luke. "It seems you are capable of holding your own against us." Technically Luke could've easily overwhelmed Oranos then and there with his warriors. See, this isn't some movie where the bad guys attack the good guys one at a time while the rest of the guys dance around, looking threatening. Hear they overwhelm you quickly. Of course, nobody wanted instant death, because that's what would happen to the first few guys who charge Oranos. Luke didn't really need his army. Walking towards us was an old enemy. The Minotaur.

"Percy, shouldn't we get Alex's hand out of the way?" asked Annabeth standing up.

I didn't answer. See, Oranos saw the Minotaur. He seemed ready to meet his inevitable demise. He turned to Alex.

"Sorry, son" he said and whacked Alex as hard as possible with his staff.

"What? Is it July already?" asked Alex sitting up groggily.

"You better bring me back!" said Oranos and made a strange symbol. A rune formed on Alex's chest and he disappeared. That was Oranos's last words to his son. Alex disappeared and the lift went down. The last I saw of him, Oranos plunged his sword into the Minotaur, and the Minotaur gored him. The god of time was no more.

All three of us sat in the elevator, only numbly aware of what was going on. Oranos was dead, or as dead as a god can be, and Alex was gone.

"Look at the bright side." I said. "At least we still have the camcorder."

Annabeth looked at me sadly and placed her head on my shoulder. Thalia drummed her fingers against the elevator wall.

"You know, we need to get to Hades." she said. "We should give him Oranos' message." I hate this. When I get Luke, after somehow destroying his perfect and wavy hair, I will kill him.

Annabeth looked up at me. "Percy this whole thing seemed too convenient for Luke. He planned this perfectly. He knew exactly what we were going to do." She had a point there. Luke probably had a spy close to us. We could trust no one.

"We can trust no one, but our bikes!" I said. Oops. Did I say that out loud?

"Percy that makes no sense" said Thalia. "We don't even have bikes." Hmm. The chance that I actually said that is increasing.

"Ding!" went the elevator. We went out before my retort reputation could be ruined. We hailed a cab and left for camp half blood. The cab ride was awkward. Everyone was quiet, no one really spoke. I get like that when I'm sad. My throat gets all tight and I have trouble speaking. Like eating shellfish if you are allergic. Without the retching noises. Hey! I've made my first actual analogy!

We arrived at Camp Half Blood. We had to go talk to Hades so we went directly to the big house, or as it is now known, the Hades mobile. No, I don't get it either. We entered, filled to the brim with bravado and hormones.

"Welcome to the six o'clock news" came a voice from the TV. "Tonight's top story: Microsoft lost over 30 billion dollars."

"What he hell? I thought we were watching Spongebob Squarepants." said Jeff who was sitting on an altered wig holder at the end of the room.

"Hello Jeff' I said walking into the room, careful not to step on anything.

"Hello Percy" said Jeff. "Can you change the channel over there?" asked Jeff. Woah! He had a one track mind and a good head on his...um...wig holder I guess.

"We have no time for your shenanigans." I said. "We must know the location of Lord Hades."

Jeff grinned crookedly. "About that. See Percy, the war has started. Hades is on Olympus. At the moment no god but Zeus can leave Olympus. Why do you want to see him anyway?" asked Jeff.

"Oh. Oranos has a master plan that has to be implemented or all civilization will be destroyed. So as you probably can guess, this is important." I said.

"Oh. That. Well I heard something about a plan that has to be implemented in three days but that's about it. And Hades didn't leave a message. I guess civilization is doomed then. Can you change the damn channel now?" asked Jeff.

"Jeff you have to give us all Hades' personal books. We must find out what the plan is." I said and almost grabbed Jeff's...um...wig holder.

"Sorry Percy but my hands are tied" said Jeff.

"You don't have any hands" I said.

"Well, I guess that means I really can't help you" said Jeff. Great. This sucks. I'm getting screwed over and over again, but not in a good way.

"Peter" said Mr. D irritably walking into the room. "You are still alive. I guess my karma is worse than yours then. Well, you look depressed. Don't worry; I have speech for the entire camp. Come on! To the dining pavilion! "said Mr. D and walked off. We followed, except for Jeff who seemed to be nailed to the wig holder.

We sat on our unassigned seats. Me, Thalia and Annabeth sat at Zeus's table. We had brisket and apple pie. Coincidence? Duh! We braced ourselves for Mr. D's inevitable speech."

Mr. D stood, ready to woo his audience. Or something resembling that anyway. "Well, now my so called charges" said Mr. D. "You may have heard that a war has declared, which can cause several thousand deaths. Well, you are wrong" said Mr. D. A collective sigh of relief went up, except from some of the traitor god's children.

"This war can actually cause the death of everyone and everything you have ever loved. Doesn't that feel better?" asked Mr. D. Oh! The delivery was a bit off, but brilliant! "Yes children, this war promises to kill hundreds. And hopefully, in the course of the fighting several of you will be maimed, torn to shreds or even incinerated. In fact, there is a very good chance of that happening! Isn't that thrilling news?" asked Mr. D. Several people swapped panicked expressions. No, I don not know what's wrong with them.

"By your panicked expressions I guess yes! Excellent!" said Mr. D. "This war is an attempt to get Kronos to retake the throne of all gods. Now kids, in the course of the fighting we may lose. However we are prepared for the possibility. Don't tell anyone but we have placed a whoopee cushion on the throne, just in case Kronos does get the chance to sit on it." said Mr. D. Wow. D is rocking them. From relief, to panic, to stunned silence in less than three minutes. He should like, give a course or something.

"So now you are better informed of what you, and we all are facing. Of course many of you may die, in fact I'm rooting for that to happen, and some of you may acquire strange facial hair but we will prevail. Of course, the camp's training curriculum has been completely altered to respond to the devilish threat. Now children, do not let the evil twins, despair and hopelessness take you. For I'm leaving you. For three whole days I will be gone. The sobbing may start." hmm. People didn't appear to be sad. Wonder why. I just let my emotional pain wash over me. There. It's over.

"Now, run, walk or crawl towards your classes." said Mr. D. "I'm going to miss you all. And while I'm gone, Chiron is in charge. Of course, over forty teenagers dying at the same summer camp may be seen as suspicious. So we told all your friends and family you were killed and eaten by Spaniards. Bye!" We all went to get our schedules for what to do. But I would rebel and save them all. That does not sound right. Whatever. Well, I plan to use my time to think of a way to steal Hades' personal books. Well, what do you know. I had arts and crafts.

I was inside arts and crafts. In front of me was a hammer, cement and crazy glue. Also some sane glue and a cloth. And this is what stood on the instructions.

_Instructions for assembling of whatever you are trying to assemble. These instructions are solely meant for Percy Jackson. Read and follow them to the letter._

_Step 1_

_Percy, you must use the hammer to repeatedly beat your self in the head._

_Step 2_

_Use the cloth to wipe up any and all bloodstains that may have appeared while doing step 1._

_Step 3 _

_Continue beating your head in with the hammer until you lose all feeling. Note. We have realized that doing so may render you incapable of wiping up any new bloodstains. However, this is a sacrifice we must all make, for art!_

_Dionysus. _

Hmmm. I am unsure if these are my actual instructions or a clever attempt to kill me. But, if these were my instructions, what were the cement and glue for? Ha! The cunning assassination attempt wasn't thought all the way through. Anyway, my brilliant plan for stealing all of Hades' personal books had completely formed, in my head. It was now on!

Annabeth was waiting for me out side the. "Well, have you found a way for us to discover the elusive plan?" she asked.

"I have." I said. "It is brilliant in essentials and awe inspiring in the lager scheme of things." Once again I have no idea what I said, but it still sounds so damn good.

Thalia punched me on the shoulder. "And what is this so called plan?" she asked. Damn. I don't think I'm going to be able to talk myself out of this one. But that won't stop me.

"We walk into the room, tie Jeff up and start searching." I said. Now wait for the brilliance to dawn on them.

"You are a moron, you know that right?" asked Thalia. Annabeth nodded slightly. "Why should we tie Jeff up? He can't move without help!" said Thalia. Ah. It seems my plan was internally flawed. Oh, now it's stinging.

"That was the only bad thing you could discover about the plan?' I asked. Even I did not thing that plan was good for anything.

"Duh!" said Thalia. "Hades has no security or monsters guarding his room. Who told you to think of a plan anyway?" she asked. "Next time, Annabeth is in charge of thinking." Damn! If she is in control of thinking, the sarcastic driven thoughts will lose their edge! I have lost the right to think!

"Okay." said Annabeth. "Let's go into Hades' house, thing." she said. If I had thoughts they would have been here.

We walked into the Hades Mobile. Jeff was sleeping gently. We tiptoed into Hades' study. It was a complete and utter mess. It looked as if everything was searched through.

"Come on guys we have to find any thing resembling a plan." said Thalia. "Now Percy, let me explain the concept of a plan to you." she said sarcastically. Ha! Ha! I'm still thinking she sucks! Wait! I'm still thinking! In her face!

"I don't think we have to search." I said. "Because Zeus's left us a note." I picked up a note that had neatly drawn red letters on it. Here's what stood on the note.

_Dear Percy, Thalia and Annabeth_

_Hades told me that you would search his study so if you are, he will probably kill you. But we will leave that for later. For now, I am the only god capable of leaving Olympus. I shall see you five minutes after you have read this letter. I shall fill you in on what you are to do. This quest will be of the most vital importance for my reign of peace to continue. So as such you better hurry outside. _

_Zeus. _

"We better get outside then." said Thalia bitterly. Guess it was grudge time.

W walked outside ready to face Lord Zeus as he appeared on the lawn. We were not disappointed by his arrival. Lightning flew everywhere. Light shone through the darkness and eagles flew through the air. Man. The gods should start a special effects business. All three of us bowed reluctantly.

"Hello Thalia." said Zeus softly.

"Hello Zeus." she answered coldly. Hmm. Guess she didn't consider him to be her father then.

"I would like to spend more time with you but time is limited." said Zeus. "As you may know, the situation is dire. Kronos seems to have managed to remain in tact and Luke is as powerful as ever. More over, I believe they have found a way to regenerate Kronos even faster. At the moment we can not stop them. We have only one option left. We must destroy Poseidon." You know there is a turning point, where you wish you could change what you did? Well, this is mine.

"I know that Poseidon will leave for the Princess Andromeda tomorrow. I know where the Andromeda is going to be. The only thing I don't know is how Poseidon will manage to leave Olympus. You must bind him." said Zeus. Bind him? Why not straight out murder him?

"These chains," said Zeus. "Are the only chains that can hold a god. They cannot be broken, except by the half blood who put them on the god. Bind him with these, and he will be out of the picture." Oh. Easier. And then I suppose he can be a hostage. "You see, I do not except you to be able to kill Poseidon.. This way, even if they rescue him, they will not be able to free him." said Zeus and handed me a long golden chain. "Oh Yeah. If these are broken or if you lose them, be sure to offer proof that they were lost or broken by some one other than me. Otherwise I will not be able to claim from my insurance company." Guess it's true then. Money is the root of all evil and pointless extra quest things.

Zeus looked us again. "Do you have any questions?" he asked.

"Yes." I said. "How were you able to find out where the Princess Andromeda is going to be?" I asked.

"I use google." said Zeus. It makes sense, I guess.

Zeus looked at Thalia and hugged her. "Goodbye and good luck. End the reign of the sea god." he said and left. It seems we were ready to end Poseidon. To end my father.

**Thank for all the rewievs. I will now take the time to answer two of them.**

**Dartboy: Unfortunately, as the title and this chapter dictates, only one god will die in this part of the trilogy.**

**Henry.W. James: I just have. Thank you. **


	15. Fishing for sea gods

**Fishing for Sea gods**

**Disclaimer; Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain. **

Ever had the chance to get revenge on someone who did something really bad to you? It's funny actually. Well, sometimes when you summon a hellhound to eat your enemy alive it's really funny, but I'm not talking about that kind of happy revenge. I'm talking about the kind of revenge you get on someone that you actually love. Where you want to hurt them, but when you do, you end up only hurting yourself. Like when your postman destroys your copy of the new Artemis Fowl book that you ordered and you get your dog to rape him. Uh, I'll hopefully be able to rephrase that later. Back to my life!

"We are on a quest aren't we?" I asked.

"Not really. We already have train tickets." said Annabeth. That girl thought of everything. I don't mean she actually thought of everything, I mean she has a plan 9 for everything.

"Come on." said Thalia angrily. "Lets go." What? Am I the only one here dreading this?

"But first!" I said desperately. "Lets go make ourselves fashion conscience!" Okay. This may or may not work. Thalia didn't really care about fashion and Annabeth looked good in just about anything so I'm the only one who needs help.

"Nice try Percy." said Annabeth and grabbed my arm. "We need to find a way out of the camp!" Ha! I thought about that problem. The monsters would attack whoever tried to leave camp. We needed a distraction. Annabeth gave me one of those sly looks that always made me wary. "How much to you like being the bait for a massive army of monsters?" she asked. Damn! I really need to set limits of what I do and do not do. For there is no try.

Okay. So here I was, outside the Ares cabin. I was supposed to wake Clarisse and her friends up, noisily and lead them towards the monsters. Annabeth and Thalia will then get the monsters to charge them. I will run towards them, and put on Annabeth's baseball cap. The monsters will then charge the only enemy they can see. The Ares cabin. Risky? Very. But not for me, and that's what's really important.

Okay. Go time. I kicked down the door. No one awoke. I threw water all over them. Nothing happened. I lightly stabbed Clarisse with Timmy. Nothing happened. But I, the awe inspiring, and. Well, I'll figure the rest out later, Percy Jackson, had expected this possibility. I had borrowed a Cd from Chiron. I had borrowed, the Cd, Future Sex/Love sounds. Yes, I was about to play Justin Timberlake to a bunch of hard rock fanatics. The ever scary words filled the cabin, and every single person in the cabin, awoke as one. Except for me. I was already awake.

"Who dares defile the cabin of Ares!!!??" roared Clarisse. I immediately regret my previous decision.

"It's I Percy Jackson, and I'm um, bringing Sexy back into the camp!" I answered bravely. Well, it was true.

"For this atrocity." yelled Clarrisse, throwing the person who was sitting next to her into the speakers. "You must die!"

"Well, I go bravely to my doom, I have only one thing to say." I said. " Good luck trying to catch me!" I yelled running out to the door. "Also." I said before leaving. "You are all very dumb." Okay. I need to work on what I'm going to say in these, improvised situations.

"Grab your swords and get him!" yelled someone else in the cabin. Ha! Our plan has reached boiling point. Our in this case, the slow dressing of casual clothes of really ugly people. Man. I need to get a better hobby.

I was running in circles around the Ares' cabin, singing softly. The second the door opened and they started searching for us, I make for the borders. The door was slammed open. By some guy. Isn't that exciting?

"You better run!" yelled the guy as he ran after me towards the camps borders. Towards a bunch of monsters who would very much like flame grilled morons. That's why we picked the Ares cabin for this. They're as bright as a basement with a power failure.

We were making pretty good time. Those guys were caring heavy weapons with witch they hoped to rip the flesh from my body so they were slower than me. Mentally and physically. I could see Annabeth and Thalia. standing on the hill top. I could also see the monsters. And they had the fire ready. And some heating lamps. They're wood allowance only goes so far.

"I'll get you for bringing Sexy back into the camp!" yelled Clarisse. Hmm. That sounds even worse than before.

"Percy, what does she mean?" asked Annabeth.

"Isn't it obvious?" I asked, pushing my hair back slightly. Well, that got a laugh from Annabeth and a sigh from Thalia. Hmm. I wonder if I could get a refund on that sigh.

I was trapped between actual monsters and a bunch of teens who are actually uglier than monsters. Both groups froze when they saw the other groups. I ran a hand though my hair and my other hand went towards the baseball cap in my pants. This was all about looking good. Really good. I looked at the monsters and then at the Ares's cabin.

"Now this is funny." I said looking around at my enemies. "Have you trapped me, or am I trapping you?" I asked. And then I disappeared. The Ares cabin turned and tried to find me. The monsters charged. Damn I'm awesome. That's what makes me truly great. Looking incredibly cool while running away from a fight. Do you know how difficult it is to look cool while you are invisible?

"Took you long enough." said Annabeth as I handed her, her baseball cap.

"Nice going sea weed brain" said Thalia and led us past her ex-tree. You know, if you are a half blood you learn a whole lot of things that don't make any sense. Damn pine cones.

We walked down the path trying to find a highway. I was all for hijacking the first car that appeared. But no. Annabeth said that would be wrong. So now Thalia was praying to her dad for a means of transportation.

"Oh father" said Thalia. "Hear my plea and send me and my friends the means to journey to Olympus you miserable bastard." Woah! Now that's a new way of praying. Out of the sky, not literally, flew a Pegasus steed. I wonder if there was something subliminal there in it. In the sending of the Pegasus. Not inside the actual flying horse. I didn't check actually.

Thalia sat in the front, Annabeth sat behind her and I sat behind Annabeth. Perhaps I held so tightly to her because I liked her. Perhaps I was holding her so tightly because Thalia was fucking suicidal! Holy hell! We almost hit a house wife! In her house! Ah! Her flying is so bad I think I'm getting constipated! No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Percy, are you okay?" asked Annabeth looking worried. Hard to guess if she worried about me or about Thalia's suicidalness. For the love of spandex! We almost hit somebody's computer. Hmm. They were logged unto fan fiction. Net. Interesting.

"Annabeth." I said. "Please tell me we are almost at Olympus." I said, just managing to get the words out.

Annabeth smiled sympathetically. "Almost Percy. We are currently in some guy's house. I don't know if Thalia can get us out." There was a crash and we were out. The guy is probably going to miss every possession of his that we broke.

"We're here" said Thalia and walked into the lobby. Annabeth followed.

"It's times like these when you wonder why we got the fricking train tickets" I muttered under my breath. Not literally, but you know. Silently.

The guard was now reading more fiction. This time he was reading a book entitled "Ptolemy's gate." We walked up to him calmly.

"You repaired the lobby." said Annabeth conversationally.

"Actually lord Prometheus did." said the guard without looking up. "Oh shit." said the guard looking up. "I mean Lord Prometheus's efficient, lobby fixing services sir" said the guard hopefully.

"Relax." said Thalia. "We're half bloods. And we need to get up there."

"Why?" asked the guard who returned to his book.

"We need to follow my father when he leaves." I said.

"But you already know where he is going." said the guard.

"Right, but Zeus, the cheapskate bastard that he is didn't give us a way to move across the sea." I said.

"Oh. What about the horse?" asked the guard.

"The horse committed suicide. The stress of Thalia flying him was too much. Besides. Do you really think they won't think it's strange that three kids are flying over the ocean?" I asked. Some may note that how would people think it's okay that we were flying over New York. Well, our flight was really low (How to you think we flew into that guy's house?) so the mist made it look like we were galloping while we were actually two feet above the ground. Of course, a horse can't gallop over an ocean, so the mist won't help there. There. Enough unnecessary logic.

"Well, you can't go in. Have a nice life." Oh man, I hated this guy. He just wouldn't cut me any slack. He also, as I later found out, wasn't willing to cut me a slice of the pie at the victory party. He had to be forced. But then I remembered the train tickets.

"If you let us in we will give you these scrumptious train tickets" I said. Hmm. Maybe that was the wrong word to describe train tickets.

"Big deal." said the guard. "I can't go anywhere."

"Why? Are you glued to that chair?" I asked. Ha! Zing!

"Yes." said the guard and he now looked on the verge of tears. One day I 'm going to find Zeus and punch his face in.

"Well," I said drawing Riptide. "Let us see just how mortal you are!" I yelled, slashing at him at great speed. He raised his book in defense. I almost pulled up, but my resolve was firm.

"Okay fine!" yelled the guard. "You can go in!" He handed us a pass and we went. Up to Olympus, to gatecrash a meeting. That sounds kinda weird.

We opened the gates and walked in. I mean right in. Hercules's villa just didn't appear. I guess he only cam when someone was there to threaten Olympus. We walked in, and were shocked. We were literally surrounded by gods and goddesses. Hundreds of them. Most of them were minor gods and goddesses, but still. It was impressive. They were having some party until the next meeting, that is tomorrow.

"Okay, follow me." said Thalia. And started walking off.

"How do you know where my dad is?" I asked.

"I don't. But I know where Hades is." she said. "Listen" she said. I did. That was when I noticed how brilliant Thalia was. She was in her element. She was following Hades' voice.

Hades was standing at the drinks table, yelling at someone. Or something. "Moron" he muttered. And turned.

"Percy! Annabeth! Thalia!" he said. "You escaped from camp! Must have been when my monsters were feasting on the tasty remains of the Ares cabin!" said Hades. Uh oh. You know I was being sarcastic right? I didn't really think the monsters would eat them. Honest! I swear!

"They were really eaten?" asked Annabeth, who looked as if she was shocked and nauseated. The monsters probably felt that way after eating Clarrisse. You know, the electric spear and everything.

"No, just somewhat maimed" said Hades smiling. "How've you been?" he asked.

"We have no time for that." I said. "Oranos says it's time."

Hades immediately drew himself up to his full height. Untransformed full height actually.

"You have your orders then?" he asked, looking around.

"Yes." I said.

"Don't talk about that anymore." said Hades softly. "He has spies everywhere." He then continued in an overly loud voice. "Hi my friendly half bloods. I'm Hades and I enjoy necrophilia. It is very nice." The uh, speech had its desired effect and several people edged away from us. Of course for Hades it's a lot different than it is for us.

"We need to know where Poseidon is" I said. We did need to know! It was the truth! Honest!

"Oh, you want to say goodbye to your dad then." said Hades. Man he was a good actor. Didn't even develop a strange facial quirk. "He's at the mini bar." said Hades. "Getting ready to leave. Bye for now."

We went, like shadows. Loud, annoying and very visible shadows. Poseidon started walking away from the mini bar. He went to the edge of the room, at the balcony. He waved his hands. It was strange. Blue light formed on his right hand. Black light on his left. And white light seemed to sneak behind him and also hit the window. It opened.

Annabeth breathed. "You fool!" I said looking at her. 'You've blown our cover!"

"Shut up Percy." said Thalia and started walking after Poseidon. It seems we've caught the sea god. To the Princess Andormeda! Dun! Dun! Dun! You may ask why we aren't capturing him right now. Well, lets just say that if a half blood harms a god on Olympus his entrails becomes his extrails. And besides, Poseidon just jumped the three hundred feet off the mountain. Hmm. The chase is on!

**Note: I dislike Justin Timberlake very heartily, thus his CD featured in this chapter. I prefer Rock.**

**Note on the Note: It's a note. It has information that is relevant to the story, but not so relevant that it can be inserted into the story without breaking the flow.**

**Note on the Note on the Note: I don't get it either.**

**Irrelevant sign off: All of you who are about to rock, I salute you! Also, crippling is wrong. And I'd like to thank Becky Creighton, Blooming Author7, Tigster5, Dartboy, Henry. R. Williams, A great and terrible beauty, Poseidon fallen Pyro and Sarah for rewieving. Bye!**


	16. True betrayals of a lair

**True betrayals of a lair**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain.**

This was it. Our chance to end Poseidon and to end this war. Of course, as you will learn, things went horribly wrong. I'm mean it ended worse than Spiderman 1. This was a remarkable example of just how good Kronos is at hiding his plans. See, he gave us the chance to save western civilization. We took it and we succeeded. Just like he wanted us too. Just like knew we would. Back to my life!

"How are we going to follow him?" asked Thalia, looking down as my father took a two fifty meter plunge.

"Elementary my dear." I said. "We jump."

""We jump off a two hundred foot cliff. Are you nuts?" asked Thalia. She was wrong. I was Percy. Anyway. This called for some fast thinking. I could take the jump and survive. The water wouldn't hurt me, but at this distance Thalia and Annabeth will be turned into dead sushi. What to do. What to do.

"Annabeth, what will happen if you do hit a whale at the end of a two hundred feet jump?" I asked. Incidentally, this is not cruelty to animals. That whale owes me a favor. Long story. But it involves me, him, a whaling ship, and some weird plot to expose the fairy people. I had saved him from the exploding whaler.

Annabeth looked at me intently. "Percy, we will either be fine, or dead." Hmmm. So either way, no pain at all. I like those odds.

"Give me five minutes, and then jump off the cliff." I said.

"Percy what are you doing?!" yelled Thalia. Fool! This is crucial to success! I jumped off the cliff. That's right. Off a two hundred foot cliff. Now. This is where the plan can go wrong. See I didn't actually check if the see was within jumping distance.

"Holy Shitttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!" I yelled. This was like the time Ares had diarrhea! With a casual "plop" I hit the water. Now. To find that whale.

I looked up. It was the time to utter the faithful call of the whale. "Whale, please come over here!" I called. Hmm. He was probably playing hard to get. "Whale, come over here or I will gradually poison your water and pollute your air!" I called again. Hmm. Okay, at first it was fun, but now he was just being cruel. "Whale, get here or I will stick Riptide right through your blowhole. I'm not saying which one." Wow. That got him here quickly.

"What up Percy?" asked the whale in his deep, telekinetic voice. I can talk to fish and horses. I wonder if Thalia can talk to eagles... I'll never know, unless I ask. "Seriously, what's wrong Percy?" asked the whale. "Has Tyson turned gay? Is Tyson interested in incest? Were showering and found him standing quietly in the corner holding a towel and some skin lotion-

"For the name of all things not related to that stop thinking!" I yelled telekinetically. That was so wrong. So wrong.

"I'm just yanking your chain." said the whale. "Tyson said he was way out of your league. So. What do you need?" Ah. To business. Shit. I'm still shaking. Of course, Tyson was prone to staring in the locker room and, oh fuck.

"Right." I said. "I need you to like stand or lie, or whatever over there so my friends will hit your soft cushiony body and not die horrible deaths when they jump off the cliff." I said. Now, wait for it.

"Are you crazy?" asked the whale. "They would probably die. Can't you just shoot up a waterspout and catch them with that?" Hmm. Why didn't I think off that. It could've saved me a lot of therapy. And clean pants. But at least they were dark. Stupid, stupid whale.

"Okay. Let's hope this works. Can you follow Poseidon for me then?" I asked. The whale nodded, which caused several small fishing boats to capsize.

"Hey Sea weed brain!" called Annabeth, waving at me from the shore.

"Gah! How did you get here?" I asked, looking thunderstruck. (I could see my own reflection in the water.)

"We walked." said Thalia. "Where's Poseidon?" This was so sad. We never had time to talk any more.

"I have a whale tailing him." I said. "So." I said, looking around. "Do you guys fish?"

"Percy, shut up." said Annabeth and jumped into the water. Thalia also jumped. Woah! She looked completely different without eyeliner and gel. Completely different. Like peas without carrots. Damn analogies.

"I'm back." said the whale. "I can take you to Poseidon if you like." Yes! Were back in the game and inside the whale! Man, it's clammy.

"Percy, why do we have to ride inside a whale?" asked Thalia. Ha. She had no eye for detail, no ability to see the finer details, such as I'm not to be trusted with anything which requires strategic thinking. Or mining. I suck at that.

"Come on. It's not that bad." said Annabeth. "But seriously, what does this whale eat?" asked Annabeth, looking at the whales inviting stomach juices. Really. They actually send me a SMS to try and convince me to jump into his digestive track. I wasn't going unless they offered me a free toaster. I always know a good deal.

"Tourists, fishes, harpies, clotheslines, carp, codfish and moronic people who I claim to be giving a lift to." said the whale. It's time like these when I'm glad I the only one who hears this kind of thing.

"He says codfish." I said. Wow. My first censored message. Now I know how the movie guys feel. All hollow and empty inside. Those sick bastards.

"We are coming up on the Princess Andromeda." said the whale blearily. "Shall I ram them while you clime on to the ship, inconspicuously?" asked the whale.

"Yes. That will be excellent. Thank you Jeeves." I said.

"I told you it's Ned." said the whale angrily.

"I told you I don't care." I said.

"Fine!" said the whale angrily and spat us out. The whale then proceeded to loudly and painfully ram the ship while me, Thalia and Annabeth climbed onboard. At last. We were on the fabled Princess Andromeda. For the third time. That does it. Soon, I'm sinking this ship.

"Look." said Annabeth, pointing off towards a direction. Or something like that anyway. "Poseidon." he was walking off. With long, purposeful, strut like strides we followed.

Two guards appeared in front of my dad. He pointed his trident and blasted them straight back to Tartuarus. Man, these guys had strict rules. My dad turned a corner, and two more guards appeared.

"We don't have time for this." Is said, drawing Riptide. These guys were well armed lizard guys. How many of them are there?

Thalia smiled. "Percy, this is why you should be glad you aren't my enemy." Thalia took out her own blade. A sharp wind went thought the corridor. It didn't bother me or Annabeth but it knocked those guards off their feet. Seems I'm not the only one with powers over several elements.

"It's like I always say." I said approaching the guard quickly. "Never strike an evil lizard guy when he's down, unless you are certain he can't get up." Before the lizard guy could do anything else, he lost his head. Thalia stabbed her guy through the back before he could stand up properly.

"Come on Percy." said Thalia.

"You can control the wind?" I asked.

"Yeah." said Thalia, walking off in the hallway.

"What about thunder?" I asked.

She smiled. "Not yet, Percy. Not yet." Guess her powers, while still awesome were no where near as developed as mine. This also makes you wonder what Hades' kids were able to do.

"Stop." whispered Annabeth. We watched. Luke was standing at the edge of the ship, staring at the whale that was still ramming the ship. He flicked his hand, and the whale was blown away. My dad, however, was sneaking past Luke into another hallway. Why was he sneaking? Why am I asking myself questions? Why can't I stop?

Luke was wearing ordinary jeans and a white vest. The bastard. He still seemed focused on something in the ocean, though I swear he saw us out of the corner of his eye. We walked by calmly, slowly and softly. When we entered the other hallway, I could swear I saw a hint of a smile on his oh so soft lips. Oh crap. Here I go again.

We followed Poseidon some more. I admit, I found the lack of guards disturbing... However, as I later found out, that was all part of the plan. As it was, we made it at just the right time. It was just the right time, when we entered Luke's evil chamber of good food and mediocre sarcophaguses. Like I said. Just the right time. My father was standing there, his trident pointing straight at the sarcophagus, energy building up. In that moment, weariness and power flooded through his veins. In that moment, he was defenseless. In that moment, I struck.

"What the hell? Who's wrapping chains around me?" asked Poseidon, looking shocked. His last words were, "Percy! No!" before I wrapped the chains around his mouth. I probably would've tried to take my father to Hades or Alex so that they could finish him, I couldn't, wouldn't do it. Where is Alex anyway?

"Hello Percy." said Luke, walking in as if he owned the place, which he technically did. "You captured Poseidon and bound him in unbreakable chains. Oh deary, me. Whatever are we to do?" Okay. That wasn't your average defeat speech. He had no idea how to do this kind of thing. Stupid inexperienced villains. They just don't give you that good feeling when you beat them.

Luke's smile widened incredibly. "So you didn't know. Hades and Poseidon thought they could actually beat us at our own game." What? Was he referring to a scrabble tournament or something far more sinister? "It would seem Kronos was right. Percy, like it or not, I'm going to let you live. Thalia and Annabeth too. If you are this easily manipulated, well, you've helped us far more than you damaged us. So, off you go."

"Wait, what the fuck do you mean?" I asked coldly. Oh man, I was ready to kick his ass. My adrenalin rush was coming on full force. Riptide and Timmy were taken out of their sheaths and pen holders alternatively.

'Percy, you don't understand. Like it or not, you are our weapon. And I wasn't giving you a choice." he said, and pushed forward with both hands. Some invisible force hit us, and threw us all the way to the New York coastline. The last I saw Luke had drawn his sword and was holding it menacingly above Poseidon. At the coast line, we were greeted by a good friend.

"Thalia, this time, I'm flying the Pegasus." I said as Thalia tried to get on first. We flew in silence. The Pegasus complained of the smell. This was getting ridiculous.

"Why do you think Luke just let us go?" asked Annabeth. This was going to get complicated.

"Perhaps he is laboring under the assumption that he will be able to get me to remove the chain with some weird form of mind control, and then get me to use the chain on Zeus, or maybe he is betraying Poseidon. Perhaps Poseidon is no longer necessary for his plot to overthrow Zeus, so he is now seen as a threat. As such he has to be removed, if only temporarily." I said. Damn, I sound good when I have no idea what I'm saying.

"Even so," said Annabeth looking sad. "He still acted weirdly. It almost looked if Poseidon was trying to destroy Kronos..." We sat their in silence. Each trying to try and figure out what Luke was playing at it. And I'm pretty sure it wasn't scrabble.

We landed at camp half blood. "Well, guys I'm beat." said Thalia and walked towards her cabin.

Annabeth looked at me. "Percy, do you think what we did was right?" she asked. "Did Kronos maybe, I don't know, trick us?" she asked. She as always was right, but I didn't know that yet.

"I don't know." I admitted. "But don't worry. We'll be fine. Or dead. By the way, if I die do you think Hades will let me borrow his AC DC Cd's?" I asked.

Annabeth laughed. "Good night, Percy." she said and walked towards the Athena cabin. I ran towards my own cabin, feeling oddly mystified. Or maybe it was just the fact that the smell of roast Half blood was coming from the Ares cabin.

I plunged unto my bed and fell asleep as soon as I left the waking world. That night, my dream continued. A dream I had over two years ago, the dream that Kronos let me dream about my quest. Too bad he didn't say which one...

_Hail the conquering Hero! _Came a voice. I couldn't see who said it. But the tone wasn't what I expected. The voice actually sounded like he thought I was a hero. I stared at the skeletons standing around me. Grinning at me. Accepting me.

One skeleton, dressed in ancient Greek armor stood before me.

"Take your Blade, Lord Perseus." he said, handing me Timmy.

"I take it Riptide is lost then." I answered, in a deep voice. Man, in an undead state, I look awesome. I wish I could take a picture.

"Yes, my lord." said the skeleton. "Here is your banner." He handed me a long wooden oak staff with a flag at the end. "My lord, you must lead us."

"Lead you?" I said. "Lead you where?" I asked.

"I'll tell you that. It's time to go, Percy." said a voice from the door. Hades' voice.

"But I died." I protested.

"Yes." agreed Hades, smiling. "But that does not mean it's over..."

Then I woke up. Someone was shaking me. Annabeth.

"Annabeth, I was having a good dream." I said, raising my head to look at her.

"Percy, come on. Chiron said Alex should come out of Limbo any second now." she said.

"It was about skeletons." I said and suddenly what she said registered. "What? Alex is coming out of what?" It's odd. I didn't know he danced.

"It's simple Percy. Oranos couldn't throw Alex off the cliff, he was too weak due to the cliff's effect. But, he could send Alex into a time, space limbo thing. Unfortunately he couldn't control it and Alex has been trapped in Limbo all this time, but he should be able to break out now." said Annabeth.

"Coffee. I need coffee. Or maybe even lighter fluid. I am incapable of comprehending what you are saying." I responded testily.

"Come on Percy." she said dragging me out of the bedroom. Its times like these I'm glad that I'm too lazy to bother to take off my clothes before going to sleep.

Thalia and Chiron were waiting for us at the top of the hill. "He should come out right here, now." said Chiron looking up at open air. Where art thou now, coffee? I need thee now more than ever.

Suddenly a massive explosion cut through the air. Now that wakes you up extremely fast. Like waking up next to an iguana or something. Alex jumped out of the hole looking no worse than usual.

"So, what did I miss?" he asked looking all three of us over.

"Well, we succeeded in the quest." I said.

"Oh Yeah! Rock on!" said Alex, throwing his hands in the air. "Everybody dance! Now!" he yelled. "Kronos is back in Tartuarus!" Wow. He was ecstatic.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. "Kronos isn't in Tartuarus, we just tied up Poseidon!"

Alex looked at me funny. "Why would you tie up Poseidon?" he asked.

"Because Zeus told us too." I said, returning his funny look. "He said that was what you wanted us to do."

Alex expression changed from calm to panicked. "He told you, you tied up...Oh shit." said Alex. "Now we're really screwed."

**Now, for some rewiev responses! Yay!**

**RugbyKing0418: True.**

**Beck Creighton: You know what's really awesome? The fact that every single Person In the PJO section despises Justin Timberlake! You rock people. Anywho, what does the other Conscience mean?**

**BloomingAuthor 7: Yes I noticed that, but why is it in audio form? Can someone please type it for me? My browser won't allow me to download it.**

**A great and terrible beauty: Yes. My friends usually play that song just to annoy me. That and some song called "no promises"**

**Henry.W. John: The feelings of elation are mutual. **

**Dartboy: If crippling is wrong, I sure as hell aren't right. Ps. Why do you think Poseidon is the only male god with the guts to stay in the same room as Zeus?**

**Note: I'm now answering rewievs like this because it's easier. I do it at the bottom of the page so you don't have to scroll all the way through it if you just want to read the story. **

**Inevitable sign off: I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed. Unfortunately, this fic is coming to it's end. There are only two chapter left, and then I'm going to start writing the sequel, which is to be titled Deadly Alliance. It will be longer and slightly more serious than Fall of the Sea God. In any case, all my fics end with modified versions of rock , punk, metal, alternative and acoustic songs. As such, if anyone has any suggestions on what songs should be modified, please tell me. Note: I do not do anything but songs of the afore mentioned genre's. So far , I have:**

**Immortal Idiot: Sung by Percy.**

**Modified Fat Lip: Sung by Hades**

**What's my age again?: sung by Alex**

**And, I cause wars not lawsuits: Sung by Ares at Aphrodite and Heaphsteus's wedding. Unlike Last of the Forsworn, I will be hosting the karaoke this time. If anyone wants in, just tell me. **

**There will also be a couple of one shots added in. Anyway, until next time, look after yourselves and your teeth. As pointed out in this fic, dental hygiene is important. **


	17. The penny drops

**The penny drops and loses value**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain. Note: Technically this story is a Drama/ Action Adventure. Unfortunately, this is the dramatic part. **

You know, have you ever heard that some one had shot himself in the foot? Probably. Now, have you ever heard that some one who, through a series of carefully planned incidents caused the death off his own father due to the fact that no one told him his father wasn't the traitor? No? While I just have. My chances of getting invited to the annual hero barbeques are getting slimmer and slimmer. But now, I've killed my father. Killed the only god who could save us. Back to my life!

"He won." said Alex angrily. "We had everything planned out perfectly. Everything. And he still fooled us!"

"What do you mean?" I asked. I don't really get what was wrong with Alex. We had won. We had defeated my dad and locked him up. It would take the titans forever to get through those chains.

"Percy you left your father defenseless upon the Princess Andromeda. He is mostly likely in Tartuarus now!" said Alex. "Curse you Zeus!"

"Wait, why would they kill Poseidon?" asked Annabeth.

"Not kill girl, we can always bring him back but it will take forever." said Alex.

"Fine then, why would they send him to Tartaurus?" I asked. This was getting way to confusing.

"Because your father never was the traitor, Percy. Zeus was" said Alex.

A shocked silence followed Alex's words. I had the feeling we were now really screwed. Like Alex said earlier.

"We should have told you" said Alex. "But we couldn't. It would've cost us everything. Besides, I was under orders from Poseidon himself."

"How do you figure... No screw this!" I yelled. "If my father isn't the traitor why aren't we going back to the boat to save him?"

"Because. By now Luke has probably finished Poseidon off. Oh, man we're screwed now." said Alex. Hmm. He was like one of those overly jittery Hamsters.

"I don't get it." said Thalia. "Why, I mean how can Zeus even be the traitor?"

Alex shook his head. "It's a long story girl. This is going to take some serious explaining." Oh goody! I love stories. Now all we need is a camp fire. Alex seemed to read my thoughts and threw a small fireball on the ground. "It's time I explain, everything." said Alex. "Everything."

"Long ago, fifty years ago, the Oracle of Delphi made two Prophecies. One, was that the next half blood child of the big three who reaches sixteen, will either destroy the gods or save them. Now the other Prophecy was actually just an update on a four thousand years old Prophecy. It was merely a confirmation that, the original prophecy will also be fulfilled when the child reaches sixteen." said Alex. He looked at Annabeth. "Annabeth, why was your mother born out of Zeus's head?"

Annabeth didn't need a lot of time to think. "Because Zeus swallowed my uh, grandmother to stop Athena from being born." she answered. Woah! Even abortion seems a better option than that.

"Right." said Alex. "Now why did Zeus not want Athena to be born?" he asked.

Annabeth thought for a second. Then her eyes went wide. "Oh my gods." she breathed. "Because the oracle said that Athena would be the one to overthrow Zeus, exactly the way that Zeus overthrew Kronos." Damn you logic! Damn you to hell and then to an opera house!

"Yes." answered Alex. "But Athena liked Zeus and Zeus liked Athena. But he always prepared for the day which he would have to dispose of her. And then the second prophecy comes along and Zeus knows that he is about to be overthrown. And then, he reached a conclusion." said Alex. By now Thalia had sat down, and Annabeth had sort of collapsed into my arms. I'm feeling slightly better about logic now.

"If the age of the gods is to continue, it will continue without him. So he has decided that the only for him to survive is to ally himself with Kronos, and bring the titans back. He and Kronos. The deadly alliance." Said Alex. Now that's a mighty tedious speech. Some mighty tediousness there.

""Now." said Alex grimly. "All gods have taken sides, but it's been equaled out. See, it used to be me, Poseidon, Hades and Oranos against Zeus and Kronos. But he's taken care of Poseidon and Oranos. Excellent traps. He even called a meeting so that Hades couldn't tell you the truth. Of course, next time we should tell Hades he should ask for enough details to make sure you are actually doing the right plan!" said Alex angrily. Yep. We definitely got mixed messages there.

"Anyway the only god who isn't aware of the war is Athena herself. She of course, was told by Zeus to hate Poseidon from an early age. And of course, Hades once got drunk and used some awful pick up lines on her so she hates him to. Hades is amazing." said Alex grudgingly. "He was drunk but he was still able to write her a poem. She almost fell for him. That poem was so beautiful." Okay. There's something Annabeth didn't know about her mom. Then again, my dad once made love to a fish so I can't talk. Uh, think.

"See, it was up to me or Oranos to convince Athena to join us before it is too late." said Alex. "Zeus wants to dispose of her last. She is his most powerful and loyal ally. Athena's power actually rivals Poseidon, Zeus or Hades' power. Of course, our chances of convincing her to join up with us are slim. Zeus even once broke into Oxford's offices and altered the mythology books so that they don't mention the prophecy. Few people realize it but if you read what he wrote from right to left, it is actually a very good recipe for Spiced Lamb. Man, some of these gods need to get a life." said Alex.

"There's one I don't get though." Said Thalia. "Why did Apollo and Ares and those guys attack the camp then?"

"Oh, them?" said Alex. "Long story. Basically Zeus had convinced them that I was here to lead the titans back and crush the gods. They were supposed to bring me in, alive. Of course, when I brought Oranos back they weren't stupid enough to try and take both of us on." said Alex.

"That makes some sense." I said. "It explains why my dad didn't attack with those other gods. But why the initial attack, you know, the one that happened when we returned to camp?" I asked. Some questions that have to be answered.

"Oh that." said Alex. "Well, they just wanted to beat Dionysus up. Surprisingly few people like him." Yep. I guess people are just weird that way.

"Now I think I should ask the question that we all want to know." I said. "What is up with the devil cat, and how has he avoided the ever watchful eyes of history for so long?" Stunned silence followed my words, like the grim announcement of the apocalypse.

"Be quite Percy." said Annabeth. "But Luke. What exactly is going on with him?" she asked. Oh. So she's has forsaken me for the sandy haired boy. Her betrayal will not go unnoticed.

"Oh, him." said Alex. "Well, his glorious hair will return shortly. See, Kronos is almost completely regenerated. Soon he will return in his body to walk the earth, with his power. Luke will then return to his normal. Kronos will probably kill Luke then but it's a bit iffy there."

So Luke is pretty much done for. And so is all of western civilization. I know what you're thinking. Fly to Japan and hide out in some guy's basement until the heat gets turned off. But Hero's don't flee. Hero's die horrible deaths by continuing their brave fight. Yes, I'm also doubting my own intelligence at this time.

"So to summarize, Kronos is almost back, Zeus has turned almost every god and or goddesses against us and the only remaining hope is formed by us and Hades." I said.

"And Mr. D and Hermes." said Alex. "I'm pretty sure Artemis is also backing us up. And of course, we've got Hades' entire arsenal of monsters."

You probably think we don't stand a chance in this fight. Or you're wondering how this can make any sense. Well, as my personal by laws say, do not use after 12 October 1997.

"Alex, what was the original plan then?" asked Annabeth. Yes, this should be good.

"Poseidon was supposed to go and blow up the sarcophagus while you guys keep Luke busy." said Alex. " Hades couldn't go. It's weird though." said Alex and looked around. "He would've required the power of three of us to get through the balcony. That was our failsafe. But me and Oranos didn't sent him anything."

"Zeus did." said Thalia bitterly. "I saw some of his own power back Poseidon up. Poseidon actually checked to make sure we were there before he jumped off the balcony"

"Damn, those guys are good at this, plotting game." said Alex. He was right. Inadvertently, I would hate to play Starcraft against Kronos. He seems just to damn good.

"At least we learned one thing from this." I said bitterly.

"That after twenty thousand years, the gods best plan of defense against the children who are going to defeat them, is still swallow them alive?" asked Alex.

"I was going to say that logic really sucks, but that works too." I said. Annabeth and Thalia laughed softly. Even Alex grinned. Alex suddenly stood. He was back into pure undeterred awesomeness mode. Nothing is going to bring us down. Except really heavy weights or somebody who trips us.

"Well." said Alex, a strange confidence returning to his voice. "At the moment we are being hunted by people who want to destroy us because we are trying to save them from certain destruction. But, as always, it's not over until we win and western civilization is saved. Or, until each of us die horribly at the hands of Zeus or his agents. Otherwise, we won't be stopped."

**Rewiev responses! Yay!**

**A great and terrible beauty: I have no idea weather your rewiev is supposed to be negative or positive. Anyway, I have a rhetorical question. If everyone is so proud that they're unique, why do so many people try to be normal?**

**Becky Creighton: Thanks for the rewiev as always, though I do not do Latin. My third language is Xhosa (which I've been doing for three years and the only thing I remember is the word for door.) As you may have guessed I take English as a second language. **

**Henry. W Reily; Once again, I have no idea what I'm doing. **

**Sign on: This is the second last chapter of the story, and probably the least funny and most confusing one. It would have been updated yesterday if not for Grey's anatomy. Then again, in my opinion the funniest thing about this fic is that it wasn't written as a humorous fic. But, there should now be a note on the question of "what the hell went through my mind when I wrote this fic"**

**I've read a lot of mythology before reading Percy Jackson, which is one of the reasons why I love the books so much. Anyway, I've read that Zeus swallowed Athena at birth to stop her from overthrowing him. That, added to the fact that Zeus refused to try and stop Kronos from rising out of the pit in the **_lightning thief_**, made this seem the right way to go. So, Zeus is the actual traitor. How's that for a twist? If you reread the fic you will notice several instances where Alex names Zeus as the traitor. Also, Zeus is dumb.**

**Song that are also go**i**ng to be sung:**

Sexyback by Luke( Modified to Kronos back) Warning! Will only include the parts I've heard as I was lucky enough to be spared from the full song.

And there will also be a short fic thing at the end about Poseidon and Hades. It will be called Stay together for the Kids, dammit! Uhmm, yeah. As always, just say if there's a song you want parodied.


	18. Facing the truth

**Facing the truth**

**Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riodain, songs owners will be listed in following disclaimer**

Hollow. That is the only word that can describe me at the moment. Hollow. I sent my own father to his overly painful demise, because Kronos wanted me to. Well, at least I know how my life is going to end. As some sort of weird general. But if I go down I'm taking Kronos with me. Also some magazines in case I get bored. Back to my life!

That night I entered a troubled and fitful sleep. Now, my kind of adrenalin is different than yours. Imagine drinking twenty cans of Red Bull and then trying to go sleep. It's not easy, nor good for your sheets afterwards. Rage, anger and fear. Everything I was feeling right now. Everything that was molding me, shaping me. Everything, that was changing me.

"Morning traitor boy." said Thalia at breakfast the next morning. She was actually happy that Zeus was the traitor and not Poseidon. She hates her father with a flaming passion. With a pretty good reason. Monsters were attacking her and what did Zeus do? Use his lightning to zap those who were trying to kill her? No, he turned her into a pine tree so that she could still be sued in his fiendish plans, fiendishly. Annabeth also came and sit with me. There's a weird difference between the two of them. Annabeth will sympathize and let you know she cares. Thalia will try to cheer you up and show that she doesn't care.

"Percy, Poseidon doesn't blame you for what happened." said Annabeth resolutely. She really didn't stop doing that. She was like the freaking energizer bunny.

I never really had an answer for her when she said that. But now I think I did. "In the

end, I think that's what my dad wanted. I had a dream yesterday. The message was clear. Death is not the end. My father is trying to tell me that."

It was the last night of camp. The rest of the camp time went by as a blur. We continued doing activities and training, but my heart just wasn't in it anymore. I was starting to feel like Luke did, only for completely different reasons. He lost himself to hate. I'm losing myself to a weird sense of lose. I don't know if I'll be able to find myself again. Unless I'm on the sea, in which case I'll be able to pinpoint myself exactly. Anyway, it was three o'clock in the morning and I was sitting on a hill, arguing with myself. In my head. I didn't want people to think I'm nuts. Which I'm not. As I said before, I'm Percy.

"Are you alright?" asked Annabeth, who for some strange reason was also awake and standing on top of a hill. This was getting horror movie-ish . I can see it now. Hill of the talking silently to yourself. It'll be a nationwide hit.

"Just thinking." I said, and climbed shakily to my feet. "What are you doing up anyway?" Woah. It's a full moon tonight. The light shined softly from the moon, casting glittering spectrals of light over Annabeth's hair. See how screwed I am! I kind even think straight! And by that I mean I can't even think in a way that doesn't make me sound like a fag.

"I couldn't sleep." said Annabeth. "I kept worrying about you." Okay. I'm pretty sure by her imminent blush that wasn't something I was supposed to know. Or maybe she mispronounced the word worrying and was embarrassed about it. I still can't say audible. My audible is inaudible.

"You don't have to worry about me." I said. "I'll be fine. I always am." That's it! That's staying my catch phrase.

Annabeth looked worried for a moment. "Are you sure Percy?" she asked. "All this thinking you do, for you it's not natural." Hmm. She, as you can see is very wrong. I do quite a lot of thinking. I just don't do a lot of intelligent thinking.

"Annabeth, this not your problem." I said.

"It is my problem Percy." she said softly. Oh god. And I don't mean Hades. I did the completely insensible thing. Maybe my adrenalin rushes were changing the way I think. Maybe I drank to much Fanta. Maybe I 'm just stupid. Maybe I'm falling for Annabeth. Cause, see, the thing I did was kiss her. It was the stuff of those chick flicks my mom made me watch. We were standing on top of a hill in the middle of the night with moonlight dancing around us. Damn those chick flicks. Now I'm supposed to say something sweet or even sentimental but I got nothing. Curse you Beaches! You did not prepare me for this! We pulled away. Annabeth was blushing and looking deep into my eyes. What happened next? Well then, let me tell you. Alex happened.

"I'm not interrupting anything?" asked Alex, standing slightly below us on the hill. Fucking moment hijacker. Behind him were the only people capable of resisting Zeus with us. Artemis watched us impassively in her army pants and black t-shirt. Mr. D was in his usual clothes, but he was a lot thinner and tougher looking than normal. Hermes was standing there in a blue track suit. That left Hades. He was standing there, in what you could consider to be classic Hades clothes. He wore pitch black pants with a black shirt with the Red hot Chilli Peppers symbol on it. Thalia was standing next to Hades.

"I see the entire gang is here." said Hades impassively. "We're all here for our first meeting." He looked around at the rest of us. "Wanna go nuke a bridge or something?" he asked. Why do these kind of things happen every time I try to get romantic with a girl? Every single time a bunch of gods show up with offers to go and nuke a bridge with them. It's hard working under these conditions.

"The entire gang?" asked Mr. D impassively. 'Next thing you know we'll be getting t-shirts with a slogan."

"That's actually a good idea." said Thalia. "I'll run it by our treasurer." Curses! They've created a web of complicated financial issues through which I cannot see.

Hades looked over the skyline. "This is what we're trying to save." said Hades, looking over the entire western civilization. No, I also have no idea how he did it. "For we are the X men, and it's our sworn duty to protect humanity." said Hades.

'I'm pretty sure that makes no sense." I said.

"All in all that about sums this up." said Hades. "In this scheme of life we're just a family caught in a feud. Of course, our feuds usually end with entire nations dying out. We are here to stop it. For we are the." Hades stopped and looked for the right word. "We are those who stand against the doom of all humanity. We are heroes. Except for those of us who are immortal. We are gods. But in the sense of heroes as an adjective, we are all heroes." Well, that about sums it up.

The next day we were getting ready to leave camp half blood. It turns out those guys all cam together to try and give me my hope back. Annabeth went ahead to try and find out if I'm in a mood for people. Why couldn't Alex give me a few more seconds? I have feelings you know!

"Time to go then?" asked Thalia, handing me my bag. My mom was waiting for me on the hill.

"Yeah." I said. "Nothing left to do but to survive a whole bunch of teachers who want to eat me and give me essays that say I should give a description of time and then I start telling them of Oranos and it all goes downhill."

"Bye then." said Thalia and left towards her mom, who looked less than thrilled to see her. Of course, you should really feel sorry for Thalia's mom. Thalia was still getting revenge for the abuse she suffered at her mother hands. The abuse her mom gave her because she was a half blood. It wasn't physical, you know. It was emotional like the crap Annabeth's parents gave her. It took me a long time but I realized I was extremely lucky to have a mom who loved me as much as my mom did.

"Hey sea weed brain." said Annabeth, who was walking past me.

"Oh, hi Annabeth.' I answered. Now I was getting nervous around her. This was not going to end well.

Suddenly Annabeth handed me a card. "It's my number and e-mail address." she said. "Can you like, try to visit me?" she asked, looking hopeful.

"I'll try." I said smiling for the first time in several minutes. "I'll try."

**End of Fall of the Sea God.**

And now, ladies and gentleman, as I never promised Karaoke night!

I have no idea how I get myself into these situations. Last thing I remember me and Alex were reminiscing and now, we're both in some bar and signed up for a karaoke contest. For some reason just about everyone I've ever met was there. Even the guard to Mt. Olympus. Hmm. He wasn't lying. He is glued to that chair.

"And now ladies and gentleman, my I present you host, The Leafy Lord himself, theleafylord!" came a dryad who was standing at the end of the hall. Wow. No clapping what so ever. I mean, it was even more silent than normal silence.

"Well, ladies and gentleman." said Theleafylord. "It's time for a badly hosted show, by myself. So please don't strain yourself clapping." said theleafylord smiling. No clapping whatsoever. You could actually hear the air move. Suddenly, the silence was broken.

"Oh I love your shirt." said Zeus, walking hand in hand with Luke into the bar. "Oh dear me. Isn't this Ron's house of faggotry?" asked Zeus, looking desperately around the crowd.

"Uh, no." said Hades irritably. "This is hard rocking karaoke thing. Why would we be in a gay bar?"

"Uh..." said theleafylord, looking uncomfortable. "It's the only place my credit is still good."

Zeus and Luke smiled brightly. "Yes! It's time for a sing a long!"

"Karaoke." said Hades.

"Whatever." said Zeus. Man, I swear that's our saying or something.

"Ladies and gentlemen, let the fun begin!" said theleafylord.

"Get off the stage before in make water color paintings on your eyeballs!" yelled someone in the crowd. So that was a mood breaker.

"Right, first up, we have Percy singing American Idiot, originally done by Green Day!" said theleafylord. Happiness that he finally went off the stage flooded the room.

"Right." I said, standing on the stage. "I've modified this song to be called "immortal idiot!"

"Is he insulting us?" asked Athena who was sitting on a bar stool.

"No." said Hades, sliding closer. "He's trying to prove a point." Ha! Now was the time to prove something that always freaked me out in Mythology! Time for immortal idiot!

_Don't wanna be an immortal idiot_

_Don't wanna engage in rape, incest and pedophilia_

_Can you hear the sounds of hysteria?_

_I think Hades is engaging in some serious necrophilia_

_Welcome to a new sort of family_

_One where you can't be loved like a brother_

_Because that's a relationship unlike any other_

_Ares lost his virginity to his mother_

_And that's enough to argue._

_Well, maybe I'm the faggot Fanfiction. Net_

_But this is just how interest in Athena I'm going to get_

_I know it may be wrong to dig Annabeth's mother_

_But I think she needs a younger lover_

_Welcome to a new sort of family_

_One where everyone's stays away from any sort of wedding_

_The play family games like twister_

_Zeus was desperate and married his sister_

_And that's enough to argue._

_The prophecy tries to dictate tomorrow_

_I'm not the one who's going to follow_

_For that's enough to argue_

"Right." said theleafylord who jumped on the stage. My applause died quickly. "Next up, is Alex, who will be singing What's my age again, a song previously sung by Blink182.

"Yes." said Alex, walking onto the stage. "Whatshisface is right. I'm singing what's my age again, but only in the way it happened to me. It was horrible. I still get flashbacks. And most of them didn't even happen!" Okay, just get on with the fricking song already!

_It started out, it was a Friday night_

_I walk alone, to get the feeling right_

_We started making out, and she took off my pants_

_But then I burned her to death_

_And that's about the time her ashes blew away from me_

_Nobody likes you when your 109423_

_It happens all the time when I'm excited_

_I'm so sorry that she ignited_

_My friends say I should act my age_

_What's my age again, what's my age again?_

_Later on, from a morgue zone_

_I called her mom, from a pay phone_

_I said her daughter died, and I offered her a scone_

_And that's about the time the bitch hung up on me_

_I wish she wouldn't take life so seriously_

_My friends say I should act my age_

_What's my age again, what's my age again?_

Well, that was, a song I guess. Mine was a bit freakier tough. Theleafylord jumped on to the stage, killing the applause faster than it would take Hades to kill a cute little lady bug.

"Next up, ladies and gentlemen, we have Hades singing Fat lip, originally sung by the band, Sum41.Tah Da!" Hades walked on to the stage.

Hades walked onto the stage. 'I must say I agree with Alex. mortal girls mothers get so upset when I accidentally murder their daughters. I mean, how was I suppose to know Arsenic was poisonous? I thought it was a cheap bread spread. Anyway, back to my song!"

_Starting to the party like my name didn't mean death_

_Killed a bunch of people because I thought it was best_

_The only immortal in the party, nobody knew my name_

_The wildest party ever because death himself came_

_I know I'm not the creepy lord you read about in the stories_

_And I'm not as scary or as gory _

_It's none of your concern_

_I guess I'll never learn_

_Do you know how hard it is to get someone out of an urn?_

_But they didn't know me at all_

_I use my powers to let old people fall_

_But what would you except with an imagination so small?_

_Heavy metal and Punk rock, it's my new phase_

_I don't care who else follows my craze!_

_Cause I like having fun at other people expense _

_To me killing you is a minor offence_

_It's not just a phrase, I can have it easily arranged_

_I'll tango while you drown in fishpaste!_

_So, don't count on me, to let you know when_

_Don't count on me, I'm not good with numbers_

_Don't count, the god turned in this_

_Don't pray to me, cause I'm not listening!_

Hmm. He kind of ended on a weird note but bravo, bravo. Theleafylord jumped on the stage. The stage, pissed off by now, threw him off.

"Whatever." said theleafylord. "Now at great personal expense, see I had to listen to the entire song, twice to write this, it's Luke, singing Sexy back, a song originally sung by Justin Lumberpond."

"That's Timberlake!" yelled Luke. Woah! He has issues.

"Timber, Lumber, Lake, Pond, Same diff." said theleafylord. "Now please get this over with!" Okay. Damn no logic zone. Someone stole Riptide to stop me from impaling myself. Must beat self to death with barstools. Damn. Their nailed down. No! Luke is singing!

_I'm bringing Kronos back! Yeah!_

_The gods really don't know how to act! Yeah!_

_Join the revolution, join the wave! Yeah!_

_See my hair baby that means I'm Kronos' slave! Yeah!_

_Here we go! Who brought Kronos back?_

_(Note: I past out and, during the second time, set my carpet on fire during this part of the song. So unfortunately, this so can't go on.)_

Wow! That almost past for music. Now on with the show!

A.N.: Unfortunately these are the only songs I could think of to parody. Now, because I hate posting them in other states, and because they feature OC's from fall of the sea god, one one shot! And it missed!

**Slappy hours: A small ficlet of something's what happened in the underworld when Percy was training there. Note: The laws of the cult are the same as some of the bloodhound gangs rules of Hell Yeah.**

Training against countless monsters for no apparent reason or logic. It's my style. Anyway, this is what really freaked me out in the underworld. Not the dead, or the hellhounds or anything else, but the cult of the typewriter. Yes, I said the cult of the typewriter. Back to my life!

"Percy, I have something special for you today." said Hades and led me off towards the field of punishment. "The field does extremely good work." said Hades, looking over the fields, where people were made to do horrible things.

"Is that Genghis Khan?" I asked, pointing to a tall guy who was being made to repeatedly rip out his repeatedly regrowing beard.

"Yes." said Hades and looked into the crowd. Someone made a weird hand gesture to him. "Fuck you too, asshole!" yelled Hades at the unfortunate guy.

"Uh, I don't mean to be rude but did you just yell that at King Arthur?" I asked.

"Yeah, I hate him the not-very-nice bastard!" I'm going into overdrive trying to find new punishments for him. Sometimes, it's better to just not ask.

"I have a question." I said. "Is Elvis dead?" Hands up! Who here wanted to know that?

"Nah." said Hades. "He went into hiding after he killed John .F. Kennedy." Okay. We've officially entered the twilight zone. "Anyway, I wanted to introduce you to an old friend." Standing right in front of us, hanging from and apple tree, was Tantalus.

"Jackson!" he yelled. "Now he's here? This is crueler than the usual punishment!"

"Shut up." said Hades and threw him a delicious fat free doughnut. Don't ask but Hades' food was both fat free and delicious. The whole, eat anything and you have to stay is a lie. Persephone stayed because the underworld is the only place with this kind of food.

Tantalus caught the doughnut in his mouth. The doughnut then combusted into flames.

"Loser." said Hades, with feeling. "Run along Percy. I have to go spread chaos and discord through my realm by torturing various people who pissed me off. You! The animator of the Bob the builder series! Come over here!" said Hades and marched off.

"Psst." said a voice at my shoulder. "Want to join the cult of the typewriter?" Woah! So I'm am the average target for freak cults and reasonably priced toiletries.

"Sure. I'm in." I said.

"Come behind the big curtain." said the voice. I went behind the big curtain. It was unbelievable. A whole bunch of people dressed in cross black robes with some of them worshipping a typewriter. This is going to far...

"Lord Jackson." said a shade who walked up to me. "I'm the leader of the cult of the typewriter. We are the ones who worship the typewriter that fell out of the sky, in hopes of finding a way out of this horrible place."

"You worship a typewriter?" I asked. "Oh! I get! Does it type freaky messages?"

"No, Lord Jackson. It has however, given us a list of rules we are supposed to follow. You may read them."

_Thou must act according t these rules or thou will no longer be welcome in the cult._

_1. Thou must only commit crimes on a Tuesday._

_2. Thou must never use the word invasion in conversation. It should be referred to as Regime change._

_3. Thou shall make fun of Zeus, thou shall not make a Speed2. _

_4. Raising your left hand is a criminal offence and must be punished by throwing the offender in the fields of punishments._

_5. Muffins are high in calories._

"Okay." I said. "Does Hades know about your little cult?"

"No, my lord. But we are rambling. We must allow you to participate. We are choosing a new leader today. You are going to compete for the prize. It's you against some guy called Jed. Debate him." The entire cult assembled before us.

"Right." said Jed, looking across the entire cult who assembled before him. "See, I believe baths are things which should be done alone, or with a few close personal friends of similar or different gender. But what about Percy!??" he demanded of the crowd at large. Okay, he wants to sling mud. Well, you need to be older than seven to play this game.

"Yes, while Jed may make a good point, I have a written statement here that claims he is actually a ninety two year old woman from Cambridge!!" I said, and brandished a rock.

"Lair!" yelled Jed. "I am from Leeds!" The entire crowd gasped as one. Now, to reclaim my throne of brilliance.

"Hey Jed, catch!" I said, throwing the rock at him. He caught it, with his left hand.

"To the fields of punishment!" yelled a lone voice in the crowd and the grabbed Jed and lifted him above their heads.

"Uh guys, all of you in the violent mob must also be thrown in the fields of punishments. You raised you left hands to keep Jed up." The entire cult ran into the fields of punishments.

"Nice going Percy." said Hades. "They were my chief source of entertainment. To you know how hard it is to get a typewriter down here?"

"No." I said. "But what was up with those rules anyway?"

"They were the result of too much alcohol. Now, continue with your training..."

**Rewiev responses! Yay!**

**Firemasterjtjy: Yes, that is the cause of very visual debate. See, with Mythology, there are several versions of every even. I read two of them. My one version said roughly the same as yours, and another said what my fic said. Yet another version said that Zeus ate Metis because he was hungry.**

**Rugbyking0418: It's been done. There's no turning back now. **

**Harry. J. Potter: Unfortunately, Luke's fate remains largely undecided. But I leave you with these words. If Romulus was raised by wolves, how the hell did he learn to use his thumbs?**

**A great and terrible beauty: Yes, many people suffer under the delusion that by "teaching" other their ways, they're helping them, when really their killing them inside like some kind of acid. **

**Becky Creighton: Actually my spelling didn't get worse. That chapter was written round about the time I put up Kerplunk!.**

**Anyway, welcome to the end of Fall of the sea god. I know the actual chapter was very short, but it just felt right. The sequel's first chapter will begin with Percy meeting Annabeth's parent and her evil step mom. Alex will return to try and save humanity along with Hades. Thalia will try and deal with her own dad's betrayal in her own way. And Percy, well, hell be in the thick off it all, desperately trying to get the plot to loose weight. Anyway, until next time, uh, right. I got nothing. **


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